Report
2
My
Understanding of The Unity Model of Marriage
By:
Christina Ramirez
Instructions
for this report are located at: http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leonj/leonj/leonpsy23/409b-g23-report2.htm
I am answering
questions 1, 2, 3, 11, & 12
The
Question I am answering is Question 1:
It is sometimes wrongly asserted that men have less feelings than women.
(a) Show that this is not true by discussing the
threefold self and the role of the affective in relation to the cognitive and
sensorimotor.
Men and women are raised differently. Women are taught to show emotion and express
their feelings when they are hurt. Men
are encouraged to hide their feelings.
This leads many people to interpret a man to have no feelings. Men express their feelings in ways that they
were taught to express them. The way
that the three-fold self interacts with one another can help a man express his
feelings. Women are more likely to
express their feelings because they are more motivated to figure out how they
feel. The first part of the three-fold
self is the sensorimotor self. This
outer layer mandates perceptions, sensations and motor skills. The middle layer is the cognitive self. This layer controls logic, thinking and
reasoning. The inner layer is the
affective self. This layer is the
purest layer and mandates feelings and motives. Since this layer is the purest layer it is the truest self and is
the most important layer that will lead the way when we think or act. The intertwining of the three-fold self
leads us to see and control the world around us.
(i) Personal life
In my personal life I
witnessed my husband express feelings that he would not normally have. The birth of your child is a momentous
moment and one that parents treasure. A
man may or may not show more feelings than normal when experiencing this
event. My husband truly expressed
happiness and emotion when our daughter was born. Our wedding day was another occasion that I saw true genuine
feelings of happiness in my husband’s eyes, facial expressions and words that
he said. I believe that he felt that it
was appropriate to show these emotions because of the events that were taking
place. Normal everyday events are times
when he may have emotions but does not express them as how I would.
(ii) Media
Whenever you turn on the
television to watch the news, you assume that the newscasters are taught to
hold in their emotions and not express how they truly feel. It is their job to inform and not to
criticize or pass judgment on the events that take place. From time to time, I notice that some
newscasters find it hard to hold in their emotions. When the tragic events of 9/11 took place. Many male newscasters were at a lost for
words. As the planes plowed into the
buildings, there were many silences that took place during the live broadcasts.
The situation was very tragic and male newscasters while at a loss for words
expressed silence as an emotion that they were feeling at the time.
(c) Do men and women
have the same awareness of
(i.) Their own feelings
Men and women have
differences in the awareness of their own feelings. They react differently to situations and express their emotions
in different ways. Women want to
conjoin with their mate and focus on the feelings that they have and the
feelings that their partner has. It has
been proven that women speak more than men and this is prevalent when we see
how women are aware of how they are feeling.
Men speak fewer words than women, which may be a factor in why they do
not recognize the types of feelings that they are having later than women do.
(ii) There partners
feelings & how do they differ
Women are better at being
aware of their partner’s feelings.
They focus on the feelings of both individuals in the relationship. It is a woman’s goal to create a unified
relationship with their partner so in the beginning the woman may have to work
harder than the man to recognize what they need to improve on to make the
relationship gradually move into the unity model of marriage. The man may resist in the beginning because
of the unknown.
(d) How does this difference affect the dynamics and progress of the relationship?
A woman intuition is to
prod her man so that she can make him aware of her feelings and
motivations. She also does this so she
can try to understand his feelings and motivations. Men do not like this process.
When active prodding is present it can cause a ripple or strain in the
relationship. When a man rejects this
process, the woman feels that he is not allowing the process to conjoin to
continue. Once this happens, the woman
feels that the man is prohibiting her satisfaction in the relationship.
(e) My opinion
At a young age boys and
girls are taught to express their feelings and emotions in a certain way. Boys are told not to cry and girls are
comforted when they cry. This cycle has
continued to be encouraged time and time again. Although the three fold self in gender relationship involves
biology, socialization, cultural and spiritual make up, the way children are
taught to express themselves is usually practiced as adults. Children watch how their parents interact
and believe that is the way a married relationship should be. This is why it is difficult to instill new
ways for men to express themselves because they have been brainwashed to
believe otherwise.
The Question I am answering is Question 2:
(a) Contrast the four
views of gender relationships expressed by Tannen in Gender Issues,
Schlessinger in The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, Coleman in The
Lazy Husband, and James in The Unity Model of Marriage.
The following information
consists of four perspectives on gender relationships. The focuses of these views are male
dominance, conversation style, appearances of women and power.
MALE DOMINANCE
Dominance should be non-existent in the unity model of marriage. Society has taught us to believe that the male should dominate the relationship. A male should put these teachings aside and begin to learn that a successful relationship that seeks entering the unity model of marriage should not be dominated by the male.
Coleman view
While equality is an important part of a relationship, a woman learns to expect the way that their husband is. A man needs to be trained to stop his dominance traits. A woman has to understand that a man was taught to have a dominance view on domestic issues and needs to remind him of how much a woman does so he can change to help the family.
Schlessinger view
The man is responsible for providing for the family. The wife must adhere to her spouse and his wishes. She must remember that she is a lucky woman for having a man that is willing to provide for her and the children. The man works all day to provide for the family and should be allowed to state what he wants specifically in the home and in the marriage. He has the right to tell the wife how he wants their life to be and how he expects her to act and treat him while in the marriage.
Tannen view
If the man than dominates a relationship the conversation will most likely be dominated by him in every instance.
CONVERSATION STYLE
James view
For a couple to be in the unity model of marriage, they must take the time to listen when one is speaking. They must touch each other in a conversation and look at one another. This allows each person to recognize that they are listening to one another. Communication is very important in the unity model of marriage and helps to avoid misunderstandings.
Coleman view
If a woman wants a man to help with the household duties she must talk to him in a certain way. She cannot just tell him to do it and expect him to listen to her. She must first compliment him then ask him to do something for her. A man is more likely to do what you ask him to do if you approach him with kindness rather than authority.
Schlessinger view
Men usually remain at a distance while in a conversation. It does not mean they are not listening. A man does not have to give you their full attention that includes eye contact when you are in a conversation.
Tannen view
When a man is in a conversation with a woman they tend to look around and not directly at the woman.
APPERANCES OF WOMEN
James view
A woman’s appearance is not important. When you are conjoined with someone, you love him or her internally and not externally. You find that the inside of your woman is the most attractive thing and do not concentrate on the outside. When you are in the unity model you are conjoined spiritually and do not depend on the exterior of a woman to make you happy.
Coleman
view
When a woman wants something done by a man, they must put on a happy face. A man is more likely to respond to a woman in a pleasant mood.
Schlessinger view
It is important for a woman to look nice for their spouse. They should put on make-up and look presentable when their husband comes home from work. It is the responsibility of the woman to make their husbands happy. If the woman chooses not to dress and primp accordingly than she must suffer the consequences. If the man cheats, than it is the woman’s fault for not looking her best for her man.
Tannen view
If a woman wants to maintain a conversation with a man, she can smile for the conversation to be positive one.
POWER IN THE RELATIONSHIP
James view
When a couple is in the dominance model the husband
holds all the power. The wife accepts
that her husband holds the power and his decision is usually final. The equity model couple shares the power in
the relationship. They both feel that
they should make decisions together but may still follow the dominance model with
the male having the slight advantage over the woman. In the unity model the marriage is guided by the wife. This is not considered power in the
relationship. It is considered guiding.
Coleman view
Although, equity is important, the wife has to manipulate the husband to believe that he has the power. Actually, she holds some of the power because she is manipulating him without him knowing. The husband also has power because she lets him believe that he does.
Schlessinger view
All men should have the power in the relationship. Women have power over men because they are simple creatures. Women sometimes forget that they have this power over man and misuse it.
Tannen view
Power is associated with asymmetrical relationships in which the power is held by the person in the one up position.
(b) Your analysis
should also include a chart or table that shows the differences between the
four books in a systematic way.
(d) How do your own
views compare to what’s in the chart?
|
VIEWS ON GENDER
RELATIONSHIPS |
JAMES |
COLEMAN |
TANNEN |
SCHLESSINGER |
MY VIEW - RAMIREZ |
|
A woman’s appearance is important to a relationship |
NO |
YES |
YES |
YES |
NO |
|
Dominance is learned |
YES |
NO |
YES |
NO |
YES |
|
Men should be trained to not be dominant. |
YES |
YES |
NO |
NO |
YES |
|
Women should talk to men a certain way when they want something |
NO |
YES |
YES |
NO |
YES |
|
Power should be equal in a relationship |
NO |
YES |
YES |
NO |
YES |
|
Power is important to a relationship |
YES |
NO |
YES |
YES |
YES |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
(c) As well, give your
personal opinion on the elements or entries in your chart.
I believe that Dr. James,
although part of his basis is on evidence from Swedenborgs work centuries ago
is the most innovative and new. It is
new because it presents information on how men must adhere to the woman and her
needs. Dr. James teaching showcases
that a woman does not have to bow down to a man and that a man should respect
his woman.
Coleman’s view is
humanistic based and requires the woman to manipulate the man when she wants
something. Women have been doing this
for years but no one but women knew about it.
He believes that if you want something from a man that they must be
trained to do it because mentally they are not aware of your feelings.
I think that Tannen
strictly bases her information on linguistics so she may not take into
consideration the makeup internal self.
She believes that the way a woman presents herself may help the
conversation. This leads toward a woman
having an impact in a conversation rather than the male ignoring her.
Schlessinger takes a very
male dominated stand. It is very
difficult to understand why and how she chooses to base her information on how
woman must let the man rule the world.
She believes that the man should hold the power in the relationship,
although the woman should remember that she actually has power over her spouse.
(e) How are your ideas
influenced by each of these four three different perspectives on marriage?
The four views are all
different. I am influenced by all
views. We are taught to believe that
Dr. Schlessinger’s views are what our parents or grandparents faced when they
were married. Now, many people are
following what Coleman has presented.
Coleman’s views are similar to what Dr. Phil teaches. Dr. Phil is a very popular talk show host
that many people follow. Tannen’s views
are based on linguistics and that can be placed in a biological category. Dr. James has presented information that can
be described as heavenly. I believe
that I take a little bit from each. The
influence of society and the media is an important factor.
The Question I am answering is Question 3
A husband
and wife seem to get along real well together, enjoying the same activities,
having fun, being popular with friends, etc. Then they have a fight over some
disagreement and they show disrespect and hatred for each other.
(a) Explain why this turnabout can happen and what is its cause. Be sure to use some aspect of the theory given in the Lecture Notes.
It is normal for a
happily married couple to argue on issue that they disagree on when they are
not in the unity model of marriage.
They are not conjoined and have not achieved unity at all of the
levels. They are externally conjoined
which means, they like spending time together and doing activities
together. They are engaging in
activities that require the use of sensorimotor skills. There is less focus on what the other is
thinking. The concentration is more on
the outward appearances of one another.
What appears on the outside is the external self. In the unity model of marriage, unity means
that the couple must be conjoined with the affective and cognitive self and
these are not visible. When the couple
is only connecting externally, they may have resentment, disappointment, and
competiveness toward one another and not even recognize it. A couple will have an argument, say things
that they may or may not mean, agree to disagree and make up. This cycle will continue unless the husband
is willing to give up is dominance and allow her to guide him.
(b) Discuss how
married partners can reverse this flip-flop cycle so that it never occurs again.
In your explanation be sure to apply the unity model, the threefold
self, and the conjoint self, as explained in the Lecture Notes.
Married partner can work
toward avoiding the reverse flip-flop cycle by concentrating on the three-fold
self. It consists of the affective self
that operates feelings and motivations.
The cognitive self operates thinking and reasoning. The sensorimotor self operates sensations,
perceptions and motor acts. If a couple
is ready to conform to a more rewarding relationship they must be willing to
let go of the old ways that they were to taught to rectify disagreements. If they work on the three-fold self they
will gain a better understanding of one another, which will make the relationship
easier to understand. This will cease
arguments and fights.
(d) The unity model says that men are resistant to mental intimacy and to conjugial unity. Collect data to either confirm or disconfirm this prediction. Interview several women of varying ages (to the extent possible). Make up a checklist consisting of 10 to 20 items that highlight what the women have said about their experiences with men's resistance to intimacy. Discuss the list and what it can be used for.
The following is a list of what women
said when they were asked why men are resistant to mental intimacy and
conjugial unity.
When I asked women why
men resist mental intimacy, I thought that I would get different answers from
each person. I was wrong. Many women’s
answers were similar. Most of the women
felt that men are born with the inability to encompass mental intimacy. They also felt that men are taught to be
men. They are taught that if they must
not succumb to mental intimacy because they will not be considered men.
This list can be used to
educate men. If men are taught at an
early age that mental intimacy is not a sign of weakness, than they will know
no other way. If society is taught that
is acceptable for a man to participate in mental intimacy than we will not have
a problem of men not committing to mental intimacy. This will lead to happier and healthier relationships. This may also help to facilitate how men and
women chose their significant other.
(a)Consider Tables 1a,
1b, 1c in the Lecture Notes, which is in the Section called Sensorimotor,
Cognitive, and Affective Conjunction It shows how to construct
an ennead chart using the threefold self and the three levels of mentality
creating the preference for each model. One illustration is given in the area
of sexual behavior.
Section 6.
Unity Model in Marriage:
Ennead Chart of Growth Steps
This is Table
1a (READ TABLE FROM BOTTOM UP)
|
MODEL THAT GOVERNS THEIR INTERACTIONS |
THREEFO0LD SELF |
||
|
SENSORIMOTOR |
COGNITIVE |
AFFECTIVE |
|
|
UNITY |
7 |
8 |
9 |
|
EQUITY |
4 |
5 |
6 |
|
DOMINANCE |
1 |
2 |
3 |
Section 7. This
is Table 1b (READ TABLE FROM BOTTOM UP)
|
MODEL THAT GOVERNS THEIR INTERACTIONS |
THREEFO0LD SELF |
||
|
SENSORIMOTOR |
COGNITIVE |
AFFECTIVE |
|
|
level 3 |
7 |
8 |
9 |
|
level 2 |
4 |
5 |
6 |
|
level 1 |
1 |
2 |
3 |
This is Table
1c (READ TABLE FROM BOTTOM UP)
|
MODEL THAT GOVERNS THEIR INTERACTIONS |
THREEFO0LD SELF |
||
|
SENSORIMOTOR |
COGNITIVE |
AFFECTIVE |
|
|
level 3 |
7 |
8 |
9 |
|
level 2 |
4 |
5 |
6 AFFECTIVE |
|
level 1 |
1 sensations and pleasures felt as consequences of maintaining control over the partner |
2 involved with thoughts about how to keep pressuring the partner to cooperate or be non-resistant |
3 |
(b) Explain what has been discussed in class and the Lecture Notes as "sexual blackmail." Describe the development of your thinking regarding this concept, from initial reaction to now. Collect some data on how others you know react to this concept when you explain it to them. How do you interpret their reactions and comments?
Initially I thought that
“sexual blackmail” meant that men say that sex is equal to what women feel is
bonding. They feel that a woman should
give them sex when they want because if their woman wants to talk they will
usually listen, or least say they are.
According to the Unity Model of Marriage sexual blackmail is…..According
to this cruel social rule, the wife must give her husband sex at a rate that
can be mutually negotiated, but she has no legitimate right to rely on her own
feelings whether to have sex or when. This means that the woman should agree to having sex
whether she wants to or not. It must be
agreed upon and not forced because when sex is forced it is rape.
I interviewed five
women. I explained to them what sexual
blackmail is and how they felt about it.
The following are their statements.
Age 25 – “I believe that
I have been sexually blackmailed by my partner. He often gets upset if I don’t have sex with him when he wants me
to.”
Age 30 – “Unfortunately,
I have been blackmailed. I usually just
give in because I want to avoid a fight”
Age 18 – “ I have yet to
be blackmailed, but I think that woman should just say NO and men should leave
it at that. It is easy for me to say
this because I am not married. I may
have a different answer if I was married”
Age 29 – “ I feel for
woman in this predicament, but I believe that we have all been there. If the relationship is dominated by the man
than they have a higher risk of being blackmailed”
Age 21 – “ Luckily, I am
not married and after hearing this, I may not want to ever get married.”
Many women are put into
the position where they feel that they should just give in and have sex with
their husband. They are trying to make
their husband happy and feel that they can by just giving them sex. They also do not want their husband to feel
that he is not getting what he wants at home and does not want him to stray
elsewhere. They do not want their man
to feel as if he needs to get sex from someone else because he is not getting
it at home. Most women feel that men
are biologically trained to be unfaithful.
(c) Copy Table 1c and
replace the characterization of each illustration (in each cell) into an
example of your own. Think of a couple you know in reality or from TV. The
three tables should cover these three topics:
This is Table 1c HOUSEWORK
|
MODEL THAT GOVERNS THEIR INTERACTIONS |
THREEFO0LD SELF |
||
|
SENSORIMOTOR |
COGNITIVE |
AFFECTIVE |
|
|
level 3 |
7 |
8 |
9 |
|
level 2 |
4 |
5 |
6 AFFECTIVE |
|
level 1 |
1 Husband is happy when the wife does all the cleaning. |
2 Thinks about how he can convince her to be a stay at home housewife. |
3 |
This is Table 1c JEALOUSY
|
MODEL THAT GOVERNS THEIR INTERACTIONS |
THREEFO0LD SELF |
||
|
SENSORIMOTOR |
COGNITIVE |
AFFECTIVE |
|
|
level 3 |
7 |
8 |
9 |
|
level 2 |
4 |
5 |
6 AFFECTIVE |
|
level 1 |
1 The husband feels happy when his wife answers her cell phone. |
2 The husband thinks about how he can make his wife not go out with her friends. |
3 |
This is Table 1c SPENDING TIME WITH FAMILY
|
MODEL THAT GOVERNS THEIR INTERACTIONS |
THREEFO0LD SELF |
||
|
SENSORIMOTOR |
COGNITIVE |
AFFECTIVE |
|
|
level 3 |
7 |
8 |
9 |
|
level 2 |
4 |
5 |
6 AFFECTIVE |
|
level 1 |
1 The husband does not want to spend the afternoon with family, instead he goes fishing. |
2 Husband thinks about how he can go out with his friends in the evening, without his wife getting upset, which doesn’t matter because he is still going |
3 |
(a) Consider Table 9
in the Lecture Notes, which is in the Section on Making
Field Observations. It lists two dozen AUVs – anti unity values that
are commonly portrayed in the media – soaps, comedy, drama.
This is Table 9
1.
Living together unmarried
2.
Having children out of wedlock
3.
Making each other jealous on purpose
4.
Adultery for various reasons
5.
Promiscuity and bi-sexuality
6.
Sexy dressing for men other than one's partner
7.
Having a same sex best friend who is placed ahead of
the partner or in competition for certain things
8.
Having a heterosexual best friend who is placed ahead
of the partner or in competition for certain things
9.
Same sex friends going out as a group for fun and
entertainment without their partners
10.
Flirting with other gender as retaliation against one's
partner (or other reason)
11.
Separate interests and activities accepted for partners
12.
Manipulating partner through deception
13.
Accepting the idea that it's OK to "agree to
disagree" about some things
14.
Promoting the idea that one should not try to change
one's partner but should accept them with their faults, etc.
15.
Girls only or boys only entertainment
16.
Acceptance of the idea that men are more important
17.
Promoting the idea that men are more rational than
women
18.
Promoting the idea that women are generally frivolous
as part of their gender
19.
Making it look normal for a man to exploit women
20.
Making it look normal for a man to abuse women
21.
Making it look normal for a man to have prerogatives or
perks that women should accept and honor (e.g., serving men, doing what they
want no matter what, being dominant, etc.)
22.
Making it look like what women say and think as less
important
23.
Accepting the idea that a man does not need to
"grovel" when he apologizes for something bad he did to her (the
minimum is enough and she should not ask for more even if her feelings are
still hurt or else she is being "unreasonable" etc.)
(b) Select at least
three programs for which you can watch several episodes or shows. Briefly
describe a few scenes from each show to illustrate the portrayal of gender
interactions that are contrary to having a successful marriage.
I have decided to
describe Gilmore Girls which has a couple in their mid 60’s with a high class
background. Desperate Housewives has
couple in their early 30’s that has a couple with a high status
background. The George Lopez Show has a
couple in their mid 30’s with a middle class background.
The wife discovers that
her husband has been having lunch with his ex-girlfriend for over 20 years. She was very upset and declared that she
wanted a separation because she felt betrayed.
The husband did not feel that he did anything wrong because he felt that
he was just having lunch with a friend and nothing more.
The husband held a very
demanding job. He worked many hours and
did not pay much attention to his wife.
She decided that she wanted to get back at him so she slept with the
gardener. The husband grew suspect to
her mischievous actions and sought to find the man that she was sleeping
with.
The husband mother lives
with them in their home. The husband
has a fight with his mother and tells his wife that he is asking his mother to
leave. The wife insists that his mother
stay because she felt that his mother had nowhere to go. The husband tells his wife that either his
mother goes or he goes. The wife told
him to go and he went to live with his best friend.
(c) Now describe the
affective, cognitive, and sensorimotor aspects of these interactions.
Affective: The wife felt hurt that her husband hid
something from her for over 20 years.
Cognitive: The husband thought that this would bother
his wife and kept it a secret.
Sensorimotor: The wife thought that he might be having an
affair because he continues to see his ex-girlfriend after they were married.
Desperate
Housewives
Affective: The wife felt alone.
Cognitive: She tried to think of ways she could get
back at her husband.
Sensorimotor: She has the affair.
The
George Lopez Show
Affective: The husband could not believe that his wife
chose his mother over him.
Cognitive: The wanted to teach his wife a lesson so he
gave her a choice.
Sensorimotor: The wife chose his mother and the husband
was shocked.
(d) What are your
reactions to these observations?
Gilmore Girls
I
would be very hurt if I discovered that my husband was having lunch with a
former girlfriend. I have been married
for 10 years rather than 20 years like the couple in this television show and I
can imagine how she felt. I believe
that holding a secret like that for more than 20 years is an indication that he
did not consider how his wife would feel when she found out what he did. He believed that he did take her feelings
into consideration because that is why he did not tell her but really, he
didn’t because if he did, he would not have done it.
Desperate
Housewives
The
wife should have first talked to her husband about her loneliness. If the relationship had good communication
than she would have not been lonely and had an affair. The husband should have been able to tell
that his wife was feeling the way she was and he could have recognized that
there was a problem in their marriage.
They were both wrong but two wrongs do not make a right.
The
George Lopez Show
The
wife should have always taken her husbands side. She should have recognized that the husband has feelings
too. She did not seem as if she was
aware of his feelings. She assumed that
he had no feelings and she could make the decision for the both of them.
(e) What is your
explanation as to why these interactions are portrayed so often?
I
tried to find a television show that showcased the Unity Model of Marriage and
I was unable to find one. The only
portrayal in the entertainment business that comes close to the unity is “What
Dreams May Come”. This movie is about a
couple that finds one another again even though the wife went to hell and the
husband to heaven. The husband chooses
to stay in hell with her and they are both able to go to her heaven. The entertainment industry believe that by
portraying couples that are in turmoil, the audience can relate to them because
they may be facing the same issues.
What everyone seems to forget is that the television shows are for
thirty minute to an hour. Most of the
problems are presented and fixed within that time. That is not real. None of
us are able to fix our problems in that amount of time.
(f) What might be the consequences for couples and society?
Unfortunately, our
society does not look down upon couples that marry on a whim and do not take
the time to really get to know their mate.
They see couples on television that experience love at first sight and
assume that they too can find that sort of love. They see couples meet and marry in a movie that only shows a span
of a couple of weeks. The couple long
for that kind of kinship because it is so easy and looks so wonderful. People forget the amount of time that is
actually place in the movie and that we don’t get to see what really happens in
the relationship as it progresses.
My Report on the Previous Generation:
Tawny Antonio: http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leon/409bs2005/antonio/409b-g22-report2.htm
This
report was very organized. It has a lot
of interesting information. I enjoyed
her answer to question twelve. She
chose to watch three shows that I am familiar with. She mentioned how the characters were too young and unable to be
entering the unity model of marriage.
She also mentioned relationships that cannot be applied to the unity
model because they were bi-sexual and the unity model applies only to a man and
woman.
She
believes that the relationships are being portrayed on television because they
are common in the “real world”. It is
easier for someone to relate to a television show that portrays familiarity.
I really enjoyed her
paper. Of the three that I reviewed
this was my favorite one. She took the
time to read the question and answered all the questions clearly and precise.
Stephanie Lea Regucera: http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leon/409bs2005/regucera/409b-g22-report2.htm
At first, I found
Stephanie’s report to be very thorough and concise. She was very clear when making distinctions within the different
parts of the unity model. She concluded
each question with how she felt.
Then as I read further, I
found that she answered question number twelve, the same question that I had
chose to answer. She did not follow
directions when answering the question.
She only illustrated information for one television show rather than
three. The question is pasted before
her answer so I thought it was strange that she didn’t answer it.
The overall portrayal of
the unity model of marriage was clear but she did not follow the
directions. If she had read the
question and directions
Nancy Miyake: http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leon/409bs2005/miyake/report2.htm
Nancy illustrated what
the unity model is and what it takes to get there. Her opinion on the unity model is that it is far fetched. She feels that because it may possibly take
20 years to get there it is a buzz kill.
Basically, that was the
only information that she provided. I
believe that she did not use her time wisely and was not able to finish the
report in the time allotted.
Advice to Future Generation:
This report was the most
difficult report I have ever done. I
did not expect this report to take so much time and effort. I realized that once I started this paper
that it would not take one or two days to write. I am thankful that I started two weeks before it was actually
due. I worked a little at a time. It
took time to look at the questions and make sure that I understood what Dr.
James wanted me to explain. I had to go
back and change my answers as I discovered what I really wanted to say.
To succeed in this
course, you must work hard. This is not
a course that you can procratinate and do your assignments at the last
minute. You must try to understand the
concepts and put the work into your outlines, readings and reports. If you can manage your time, you will
definitely succeed.
In the beginning, I
thought that the computer literacy part was the most difficult. Later, I found this paper to be the most
difficult. I discovered many
interesting things about my relationship and what others thought about men and
their relationship. I realized that I
have a different opinion about The Unity Model of Marriage now than I did on
the first day of class. I now want to
have a relationship that strives for unity.
I hope that one-day my husband and I work toward unity because I know
that I want to be with him in my heaven and I hope that he can join me.
My Home Page: http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leon/409bf2005/ramirez/homepage.htm