Psychology 409b November 14, 2006

Outline 8: Unity 16

By Christina Afonin

Instructions for this activity are found at:

www.soc.hawaii.edu/leonj/leonj/leonpsy25/g25-oral1.htm

Instructor: Dr. Leon James

Leon James (2006). Seminar on the Unity Model of Marriage for G25. Section 16. Online at: www.soc.hawaii.edu/leonj/leonj/leonpsy25/409b-g25-lecture-notes.htm

Areas of Observation

I. Sensorimotor Zones 1, 4, 7

a. Who gets control/hold remote

b. Whose choice prevails what movies

c. Who chooses the restaurant

d. Interaction dynamics of each other’s appearance

e. Influence from partner about behavior w/ family/friends/others

f. How they talk with each other

g. What are the conditions of physical intimacy, actions and reactions

h. Coordinated movements

i. Facial expressions when alone together

j. Preferences in tastes, colors, odors, sounds, lighting

k. Who changes topic or introduces new one

l. Who is attentive to other

m. Who doesn’t answer/looks away/avoids/ignores/walks out

n. Who yells/expresses angry & hurtful words/hits/acts threatening/throws things

o. Who marks special dates

II. Cognitive 2, 5, 8

a. What do partners think of each other about who controls who/when/how

b. How “equity philosophy” is used in relationship

c. What is attitude about one partner influencing other

d. What does each partner think of other’s opinions/views

e. What do partners disagree about/argue about w/o resolution of problem

f. How much agreement/disagreement exists between partners regarding God and being together eternally

g. How intellectually influenced does each partner let themselves be by the other

h. How clear is each one when discussing things

i. How much does each believe in marriage myths

III. Affective 3, 6, 9

a. How motivated is each partner to remember relationship things

b. How motivated is each partner to putting partner ahead of everything else

c. How committed is each partner to total unity

d. What motivates each to consider the other ahead of everything else/or not

e. How much does each try to hurt each other

f. How passionate is each towards the other

g. How much is each motivated to stay together as much as possible

Related Links:

http://www.solvedating.com/soulmates-definition.html -After making this outline, I was curious as to what the definition for soul mate was, or at least what I would find online concerning soul mates. I suppose that by comparing the term to what a united couple is, they have many similarities and basically mean one thing, that when two people’s thoughts and feelings unite they become one. How poetic.

http://www.innerwhispers.net/id10.html -This website is promoting a newsletter about soul mates and the search for one. It also says that there is more than one soul mate, which I suppose according to theistic psychology is correct as well. This website mentions a woman who supposedly can channel spirits, or so it seems from what they’re saying, I just don’t understand new-age lingo. From what I gather, the term or idea of a soul mate stems along the lines of spirituality and new age practices.

http://www.prodigalsonmagazine.com/life/2006/01/top_10_ways_to_connect_with_yo.php -Of all the websites that I have visited, I have to say that this is the most rational advice that has been given, minus just a few of their statements, indicating a “pray together” approach, the others seem to fit well into a lasting relationship.

My Homepage: http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leon/409bf2006/afonin/afonin-home.htm

Class Homepage: www.soc.hawaii.edu/leonj/leonj/leonpsy25/classhome-g25.htm