Outline of My First Third Oral Presentation
Analysis of Behavioral Indicators in a Relationship
This is a presentation of My Understanding of the Unity Model of Marriage by Leticia Valle (G21)

 www.soc.hawaii.edu/leonj/409bf2004/valle/409b-g21-report2.htm

By Michelle Horst

Instructions for this oral presentation are found at:
www.soc.hawaii.edu/leonj/leonj/leonpsy22/g22-oral.htm

1. Contrasting the 3 views of gender relationships

     A. Dr. Laura Schlessinger Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands

a. represents dominance model

                          b. husband controls wife at all three levels of threefold self; destructive

             ex: The man makes all final decisions (Dr. Laura Yes, D. Tannen No, Dr. James No)

      B. Deborah Tannen Gender and Discourse

                          a. represents equity model

b. traditional and cultural differences of communication between sexes; consequence/indicator of culture

             ex: Each person need to provide 50/50 effort to make relationship work (N, Y, N)

      C. Dr. Leon James Unity Model of Marriage

                          a. represents unity model

b. husband internalizes wife’s emotions and feelings, using them to consult when he thinks, acts, decides, etc.; eternal

             ex: The woman makes all final decisions (N, N, Y)

Significance: Each viewpoint provides insight into relationships, and also gives examples of each level identified by the Unity Model of Marriage, providing information that anyone can use to assess their own relationship.

2. Behavioral indicators and their importance

      A. Dr. Leon James: Dominance, Equity, Unity

             ex: Partners tolerate disagreements as normal and inevitable ( Y, Y, N)

             ex: Husband cooperates with wife’s attempt to change him ( N, N, Y)

             ex: Partners try to make each other happy ( Y, Y, Y)

a. dominance/equity 84% overlap, dominance & equity/unity 16% overlap

       B. Leticia Valle: Dominance, Equity, Unity

             ex: While arguing partners bring up unresolved, past occurrences ( Y, Y, N)

             ex: Each partners reciprocal differences help create person as whole ( N, N, Y)

             ex. When conflict can’t be negotiated, divorce is always an option ( Y, Y, Y)

                          a. dominance/equity 92% overlap, dominance/unity 8%, equity/unity 16%

             C. Create your own chart

                          a. understand which model your relationship operates on

                          b. guideline to identify and set goals within relationship

Significance: Using Dr. James charts and generating your own chart, a couple obtains valuable info of their current relationship status and values to obtain a higher level of unity.

3. Anti-unity values: behaviors which physically or mentally go against and delays progress toward reaching the unity model

      A. Media’s influence

             a. living together out of wedlock

                          ex: Ross and Rachel’s relationship on Friends 

             b. separate interests and activities accepted for partners

                          ex: Deborah and Raymond on Everyone Loves Raymond

      B. Relationship of parents on developing child

             a. may produce stereotypes of gender behavior

      C. Years of exposure to anti-unity values result on threefold self

             a. affective: abusive, manipulative feelings toward opposite sex

             b. cognitive: chauvinistic stereotype of opposite sex

             c. sensorimotor: aversive, unsympathetic actions and words against partner

Significance: The effects of Anti-unity values on the threefold self produces an environment of conflict and inconsistency between the sexes, even as both partners strive for unity.

Helpful Links

http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leonj/leonj/leonpsy21/409b-g21-lecture-notes.htm#field-observations

http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leonj/leonj/leonpsy22/409b-g22-lecture-notes.htm#Table%206%20and%207a

http://www.drlaura.com/letters/

My homepage http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leon/409bs2005/horst/home.htm