Psychology 409b- February 17, 2006

Outline of Men and Sexuality

By Andrea Montague

Dr. Laura C. Schlessinger, The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, Harper Collins Publishers 2004, pages 124-137

Instructions for this activity are found at:
www.soc.hawaii.edu/leonj/leonj/leonpsy24/g24-oral1.htm
Instructor: Dr. Leon James

A. Women’s Appearance

            1.  very essential factor in a marriage

            2.  men like to look at their wives naked, or dressing and undressing

            3.  husband’s sense of well-being connected to wife’s seductive behavior

            4.  women should always take care of herself and care how she appears

                        - if not, men will feel that their wives simply don’t care about them

                        -  husband may feel he is not valued as a “man” and a husband

B.  Women’s Reactions

            1.  Dr. Laura explains many women get defensive and say their husbands should love them for who they are

            2.  Dr. Laura believes this is a women’s selfishness

                        -women must accept reality that we all age and may get out of shape, and try to do something about it.

            3.  She believes that women should take care of their husbands(by giving them sex), just as a husband takes care of the wife by working

            4.  Women should not see it as an obligation, but should enjoy it

C.  Male Sexuality

            1. Dr. Laura explains that many women become hostile when talking about this issue

            2. Sexual Desire in Men

                        -  not as simple and meaningless as many women believe

                        -  man’s desire to feel accepted and loved by their wives (men’s emotional need)

            3.  Sex is a way for a man to communicate emotions to their wives

            4.  Sex is a way of connecting with a wife

            5.  It is not all about physical pleasure- as most women may feel

D.  Marital Infidelity

            1.  When we think of marital infidelity, we think of having affair outside of marriage 

            2.  But marriage involves such words as honor, love, and protect

            3.  Infidelity also happens when women neglect a husband’s need for sex

Related Links:

1.   http://solosingles.com/ssintimate

 This site is helpful in understanding sexual intimacy in both male and females.  Although the male part is mainly dominance oriented, we can see what most people feel about the male and female sexual desires.  It also offers help with what the author believes will be a way of getting over these differences in sex.

2.  http://www.apa.org/monitor/apr03/women.html

This site goes over what a female sexual dysfunction is and how it affects the lives of women.  Some parts are a bit disturbing in that seems to put the blame on the women.  But I think this will further our understanding on female sexuality and how our society views such issues.

3.  http://health.discovery.com/centers/sex/marriage/marriage_02.html

This site looks at the importance of sex in a marriage.  They discuss ways in which problems can occur in a married couple’s sex life and the remedies.  They also include tips on how to keep the spark alive once you are married.

My Home Page:   http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leon/409bs2006/montague/montague-home.htm

Class Home Page: http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leonj/leonj/leonpsy24/classhome-g24.htm