Annotated Bibliography Report

 

By: Tanja

Psy 409 (Fall 2002-Generation 17)

 Instructor, Dr. Leon James

Instructions for this report can be accessed here

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☻☻Spirituality in Sports☻☻

 

I. Introduction

 

          In my first section of annotated bibliography report, I decided to write about the harmony between body, mind and spirit and ideals of athletes that cherish and value spiritual aspects of sports.  Being an athlete myself, I have experienced, through sports, a spiritual awareness that was deeper then just focusing on winning the game, scoring the points or building the perfect body.  The history of sports has evolved from a fight for survival to the art of the expansion of consciousness and discovery of an unlimited potential within us.  Our existence is not just in our brains, it is a fine interaction between physical, mental, emotional and spiritual aspects of ourselves.

 

            There is natural athlete in each of us and we all live a game of life.  People can do amazing things that seem unreachable by truly believing in themselves.  Every person should join their physical workouts with the workings within their mind and soul in order to triumph in the biggest game ever, the game of life.  Athlete has to practice obedience to his/her athletics and  fitness and this cannot be separated from the search for life’s truths.  From this we should learn and appreciate the continuing process of discovering who we are and what we can be as an athletes and a individuals.

 

            

 

1.  Improving Health and Well Being from the Inside Out

 

SUMMARY

 

The overall content of the book Working Out, Working Within by Lynch and Huang gives us the explanation of how, during physical exercise, we can experience something deeper than just the burn of working out by using The Tao of Inner Fitness.  We can achieve spiritual awareness and learn how to find harmony between body, mind and spirit.  This harmony can be reached by using:

☻breath watching, a simple Tao technique to encourage awareness of our bodies, and to discover our “Tao minds”

☻ visual recording, through which we imagine our bodies in motion, employing all of the senses in our visualization

☻ affirmation reciting, a way to confirm our thoughts by repeating them aloud

☻ valuable ancient Tao wisdom and strategies to synchronize body and soul.

 

 

The authors of this book explained how all sports and exercise deserve better than the traditional athletics and fitness battle grounds used for war against an opponent, or even a clock, scoring goals and other external concerns.  Instead, The Tao of Inner Fitness views sports as an arena for the battles within.  The Tao philosophy explains that obedience to athletics and  fitness cannot be separated from the search for life’s truths.  If we exercise our psyches while we work our bodies, we will achieve not only outer fitness but inner fitness as well.  Every person should join their physical workouts with the workings within their mind and soul in order to triumph in the biggest game ever, the game of life.

 

 

Reaction

 

 

Two years ago when I held this book in my hands for the first time, I was thrilled just by the title of the book.  I knew that this book would answer many of the questions that I had about finding harmony between body, mind and spirit.  This book became my personal guide in achieving spiritual awareness.  Reading Working Out, Working Within was a rewarding experience for me because the book is dedicated to the natural athlete in each of us.  This book caught my immediate interest because it offered me, as a reader and athlete, a new level of consciousness.  It helped me to see sports and exercise as a ground, not only for exploration of my athletic potential and physical growth, but also for accepting the challenges within where the opponent is myself and the reward is deeply private and personal.

 

After reading this book, it was interesting to realize that we are all seekers.  We take an endless path of self-discovery.  We seek the answers to life’s deep, sacred questions and we realize how difficult it is to discover the sacredness in every day.  Despite the difficulty, we do not stop seeking.  This journey of searching for the experience of working within, is not a finished product, it is the continuous direction of the body, mind and spirit with no particular destination.  By working within, we slowly begin to let go of the illusion of control and only than can we experience all physical workouts with a deeper, inner sense of wonder, joy and satisfaction. 

 

 

Opinion

 

 

In today’s society where our success is judged by how it compares with others, this book offers a system whereby we become our best and by becoming our best we will be the best.  I enjoyed reading this book over and over again because it helped me to create more joy and pleasure while working out over these past two years.  It has shown me how I could use sports activities as powerful methods to learn the ancient truths of life that are actually lessons in criticism, patience, mastery, crisis, loss, loyalty and many others.  From this I began to learn and appreciate the continuing process of discovering who I am and what I can be as an athlete and a person.  This book was a very useful and meaningful source.

 

Before each of my daily athletic events, I now use the breathing and visualization techniques.  I strive to apply the Tao Mind and visualize the activity I am about to begin.  I must also carry the breathing techniques and the state of mind over into my physical routine in order to achieve the best possible results.  Applying Taoist principles to my volleyball game has greatly enhanced my enjoyment and improved my performance.  I saw passion, love, cooperation, excitement and support that are all qualities of healthy relationships, engaged in successful actions.  I highly recommend this book to everyone because it will help to experience the most and the best in life.

 

 

SEARCHING REPORT

 

 

The book Working Out, Working Within is my most prized book.  It is my all time favorite and I enjoy reading it over and over again.  My team psychologist Michael D’Andrea introduced me to this book three years ago.  When I first read it, I knew I wanted to own it as I found it a valuable and challenging source.  After Michael saw how much I liked the book, he gave it to me as a birthday present.  This book remains one of my favorite birthday gifts ever. 

 

I can honestly say that it was not difficult to find this source for my annotated bibliography report because I already own the book.  I have chosen this book because it gives convincing and valuable information for reaching the world within ourselves.  Every time I read it, I feel like I am reading this book for the very first time because I always find something new and meaningful within those deep pages of words.

 

 

 

2.  Fly when running

 

SUMMARY

 

In the article The Spiritual Athlete's Path to Enlightenment by Holly A. Schmid, it was explained how all people are capable of doing such incredible things that we would never believe them possible.  Schmid used both Marathon Monks of Mount Hiei and Lung-gom-pa Runners of Tibet to explain how to reach these amazing things.  These running monks appear to fly when they run.  When running, they seem to float apparently in a trance.  Many are said to be faster than horses and at times they were used to convey messages across a country.  These amazing monks practice training that develops uncommon nimbleness and gives them the ability to make extraordinarily long trails with amazing speed. They run at a rapid pace without ever having to stop for days.  These teachings are amazing.

 

Only by truly believing in ourselves can we accomplish what was once thought of as impossible goals.  Our existence is not just in our brain or just in our body, it is a fine interaction between physical, emotional and spiritual aspects of ourselves as known thousands of years ago by yogis, Zen-masters and martial artists.  A variety of methods towards this end are coming from many traditions such as: yoga and meditation, Zen stories and martial arts, tracking and outdoor observation, vision quests etc. The main core of all teachings is, "The science that liberates the mind from dullness", aiming at freeing us from our past, making us fully conscious and yielding to a continuous happiness.

 

We must pass through seven stages to achieve this.  These are represented by the seven layers of the mind and reflected in various cultures and teachings in mythological symbols and stories.  The seven stages are: freedom from the senses, freedom from the intellect, freedom from intuition, freedom from concern about the mundane world, freedom from egocentricity or action-awareness, freedom from being and pure freedom.  Also, we must become spiritual warriors who are a people that have found their inner spirit or truth and understands that in order to be a human being, one has to be attuned to it at all times. This includes the struggle and fight against all inner and outer obstacles. Therefore, spiritual peace or bliss is often a result of fight, personal vigor and the sheer application of will power.

 

REACTION

This article caught my interest as soon as I read the first sentence saying, that throughout this world, there are many mysterious and amazing achievements that can be found. People can do amazing things that seem unreachable by truly believing in themselves.  It was amazing to read about incredible dedication and the spiritual techniques that those running monks used to reach extraordinary limits.  I found it very interesting how Schmid explained that these monks had proven that when we are running and think we can go no farther, this is not quite true.  When running, legacies of these runners should help us to speed up our pace. They have gone to extraordinary limits in their runs and maybe someday, the rest of the world will be able to come across the wonderful talents of these people.

These "spiritual athletes" fascinate me and I would like to find out new, interesting information about their lives.  Their spiritual dedication is intriguing.  I cannot believe what they go through to reach their astonishing potential.  They are said to travel nonstop for forty-eight hours or more and can cover more than 200 miles a day.  In order to qualify as a lung-gom-pa runner or a Marathon Monks of Mount Hiei, the trainee must first learn to master many tasks. They had lots of emphasis on breath control and visualization techniques. They had to be able to imagine their own bodies as being light as a feather.  

What I found the most interesting about these monks, was that when running, they are wearing white robes and around the waist a rope with a knife attached. These two items remind the runner that they should take their life by hanging themselves or by using the knife if they cannot complete the marathon task.  Sometimes they run for 40 kilometers per day.  These runners follow the idea of completely anonymity and therefore no one is allowed to talk to them or see any part of their bodies.  The basic rules are very important and must be followed. The rules are: during the run the robe and hat may not be removed, no deviation from the appointed course, no stopping for rest of refreshment, all required services, prayers, and chants must be correctly performed and no smoking of drinking.

 

OPINION 

This article was an astonishing and interesting reading.  It would be remarkable to reach the spiritual phase like those marathon monks did.  For me, being an athlete, just the idea of floating when running creates an admiration.  I wish I could reach that stage, instead of struggling when running.  When we run, we only cheat ourselves by pushing, pressing and competing.  This reading expands on, there are no standards and no possible victories except the joy you are living while dancing your run.  This great statement is a perfect way to describe the lung- gom-pa runners of Tibet and the Marathon Monks of Mount Hiei. They do not run to simply be quick or to win. They are in a way dancing when they run. They are to totally focus on running and let the running take them away. Their trance-like movements show that they are completely focused and are at peace.

Schmid said that "our spirit is not separate from our body anymore than the water is separate from the stream.  The water is the stream". This has to do with the fact that running is dancing. It has to do with the emptying of one’s mind of all subject-object relationships.  This means that a runner is not a man who has the ability to fly through air, but one who can control his energy and concentrate it in a new direction. The spirit is with the runners when they are running.  I believe and know that these practices and beliefs are far away from my personal reach.  I could never see my self doing sacrifices like running 40 kilometers per day.  However, I wish I could reach this stage of spirituality.

 

SEARCHING REPORT

I used the Google searching engine.  I typed in the words “spiritual athlete” and it resulted in over 50 search results.  I just scrolled down the page, clicked and looked through numerous sites, until I found this particular article (The Spiritual Athlete's Path to Enlightenment).  Saying this, it was not difficult to find this source, rather I could say it was an interesting experience.  To start with, I red the beginning of the article and I found that I could relate this to my specific topic.  I then copied and pasted this article in a word document, just to make sure that I could find it again.  I searched through 7 or more sites before deciding that this was the best choice for my research report.

 

By using Google, I was able to get more subject matter than I had expected.  The ability to type in small phrases was very useful and easy.  There were a lot of articles to pull from, but I wanted to concentrate on something that had subject matter and meaning.  I wanted to write about something that I could easily relate to and then be able to discuss it with others.  I spent two hour on computer searching for this source.  This search of finding fascinating information about spiritual athletes was interesting and useful experience.

 

3. Sports and Religion

Summary

 

In the book Sports and Religion by S. Hoffman, both religion and sports have finally met on the same playing field for one friendly game.  Throughout his research, the author of the book has brought these two teams together to a championship game resulting in understanding of the connection between sports and religion.  Religion is seen as a cultural form that can stand outside of most traditional forms.  The tradition would take us back into the walls of church, but the cultural religion can take us outside, into a place like a football field.  The book describes a great need for human beings to belong and to believe.  Sports has it’s own gods and they are the stars and athletes who will, through their game, bring the miracles to the commoners.  

 

Hoffman sees a close connection between symbols in sports and in religion.  In his book, sporting events are equivalent to the rituals in religious practices.  One of those rituals is the Super Bowl.  It is one of those events that are played on Sunday, the same day that people go to church.  According to Hoffman, the Super Bowl is the “Christmas Eve” of sports.  It gathers millions of people and brings faith to those masses.  Church, as a house of worship, is compared to the sports Hall of Fame.  The Hall of Fame is the temple where fans can worship their gods even after they are gone.  The true fan will support and follow its team (religion) and worship it’s gods despite their losses.

 

 

Reaction

 

After reading this book, a thought struck my mind.  How could I have been so blind?  Being an UH volleyball player I was not aware that every time we played a game at the UH Arena, some fans were looking at us (players) as if we were gods.  I was worshiped and adored.  Even when I played badly, the fans would wait for me with smiles and encouraging words and would cover my head with many beautiful flower leis.  My teammates and I were actually role models to many young women in the State.  In every game we played, we brought hope to young people who wanted to be just like us someday.  Looking back at the games I played at the UH, I realized that our Arena was the temple, and every time we won it was a miracle for everybody.  We never did play just for ourselves but for the people of Hawaii. 

 

Being from Croatia, I could also relate this sort of worship to their soccer events and players.  In my country, the soccer is the main religion.  The whole nation prepares months in advance for the main soccer event.  Ever since I could remember, our lives would change during those events and just for the moment we also believed that gods were on the field in front of us.  The schools would close early, people would leave their jobs early and streets were closed for traffic and re-opened for sport fans.  A river of people would flee the city, their song and cheers could be heard from miles away.  The parade would take us all the way to the stadium and than a moment of silence: the gods were coming.  Those few moments were breath taking.  In the eyes of every fan you could see enormous love and happiness.  We all knew that we were, even just for the moment, part of an earthly heaven.

 

 

Opinion

 

In my final opinion, after reading this book, I can see sports as a religion with more influence than any religion known.  It does not matter what color your skin is or what your cultural background or sex is, if we are fans of the same team, we are therefore, all the same.  Once you are in the crowd and sitting in the stands eating your hotdog, you then anticipate the miracle to happen and your team to win.  The game can unite all fans by one perfect cheer.  Once the game is over, you go home knowing that you can experience that same sensation next week.  It is amazing but true that sporting events are visited more than any other religious gathering.  

 

Sports as a religion do not have any boundaries and rules.  You can change your beliefs (team) any time you want.  You do not have to follow the footsteps of your family and can pick your own religion.  Offerings or donations are not necessary and they do not make you a better person nor save you from your sins.  However, they will be highly appreciated, especially for those smaller teams that are in financial need.  Athletics can inspire masses of people who try to do the same things that players can do.  They want to be just like those special athletes.  When organized amateur games are held, people still relate to the great athletes and try to lead healthier lives even if it is just to play catch with their children.

 

 

Searching report

 

Once I decided what my topic was going to be, I found it was not easy finding my source.   For a change, I went to the public library instead of going to the UH libraries.  I accessed the library search engine and typed the words “religion and sports” and found many books that related to my topic. The wide selection of books I found was mainly located in the sports section where many other books about the world of sports are found.  I spent about three hours in the library as I discovered many more books that caught my interest.  Before I made my final decision, I reviewed many other books and for a moment I was not sure which one to pick because they all looked so promising.  

 

The majority of the books I reviewed were describing the relationship between sports and religion, however, when I came across the book Sports and Religion by Shirl J. Hoffman, I knew immediately this was the right choice as it perfectly fit as one of my annotated bibliography source requirements.  I especially liked the way Hoffman started his preface by relating sport and religion into the same domain.  I then realized that this information was what I was searching for.  It was not just because it appeared easy to read and easy to understand the author’s writing, instead, I found this book to be valid and the most interesting resource of my topic.  The more I read this book, the more convinced I was that I made the right choice.

 

 

4.  God and the Game

 

SUMMARY

 

The article Sport competitors put their faith in prayer, by Sue Davis Smith gives us the insight of Gods visibility in the sports competitions and teams.  Does God care who wins the big game?  Does God give one team advantage over the other?  Many religious athletes are interested in questions stated before.  Today, athletes are becoming more open to the idea of allowing God to be a part of athletics.  Visibility of God, faith and religion on the field or court is expanding.  This phenomenon is a reflection of openness to include God in all parts of life.  Thanking God for victories is an popular act in today’s athleticism.  God does not care who wins or loses, but how we play the game.

 

A spiritual athlete plays for bigger focus, not just for the team, parents or friends.  If the athlete is playing for the God, he/she is required the very best.  In this case your expectations rise and the intensity level is higher.  In sports main focus is not how you win or lose, but how did you perform and did you give your best.  This view is more important in youth sports because winning is not everything.  A lot of athletes embrace God because of an emptiness in their lives.  This emptiness cannot be fulfilled just by athletic achievements.  However, we have to keep our faith besides the field too.  Athletic performance can be enhanced with a strong relationship with God.    

 

 

REACTION

 

This article caught my interest because I am an athlete and Christian.  I am an active member of Athletes in Action group that are mentioned in this article.  The group members are Christian athletes and we go to church together, we met weekly for discussion and we do fun gathering activities over the weekend.  There are about hundred athletes who are members of the Athletes in Action on our Campus.  The majority of Athlete in Action leaders are former athletes who experienced personal revelation with the God. 

 

Long ago I wondered, should I pray to God to win the game I had to compete in?  Now, I do not pray to win, I pray for health, safety and best of both teams, not necessarily to win.  I pray for a lessons of a win or directions in learning the lessons, if I have lost.  Before every volleyball game I played for the University of Hawaii, my teammates and I prayed.  We did not pray for win but for safe and injury free games.  When one loses the game, it is not God to blame.  I found it reassuring to read that athletes, from all over the world and all backgrounds can find spiritual harmony, not just before competing, but at any time. I am surprised to find, even now, that people will turn to God, when they are faced with uncertainty.  I have been very fortunate to have God in my life since I was a child.

 

 

 

OPINION

 

I thought the article was real interesting because I could relate with it.  I found myself walking in the same path as many of the athletes mentioned in the article.  I changed my game after incorporating God into it.  I used to easily lose my focus, become frustrated and I was only concerned with winning.  Now, that I have God in my life, I am able to let him rule my actions and become the corner stone of my life.  I have noticed, that it is not whether you win or lose, it is how you play. I found importance in the impression I leave with the people who watch me play.

 

I believe the article has a hidden message.  We are all athletes in this game of life.  Life and death are all around us.  As athletes, we enjoy the spirit of completion.  As Christians, we give our lives to Christ.  The two can be separated, but together, they are an unbeatable foe.  Sports allow individuals to compete.  But, we must remember, when you playing for God, your expectations rise and the intensity level is higher.  We must enhance our athletic performance with a strong relationship with God.

 

 

 

SEARCHING RESULTS 

 

I went to Hickam AFB’s library and used their data back, News Bank, Inc.  The computer system was very easy to use.  I typed in, “spirituality in sports.”  I was rewarded with over 15 different subjects, in which there was numerous articles to chose from.  I clicked on the subject of “spirituality,” the computer displayed all the different articles on the left side by title.  And on the right, it displayed the specific articles and their entire text.  After viewing the specific article, all you had to do was hit the print button and in no time the article was printed.  I was satisfied with outcome of this search because I found valid source that covered information and ideas that I was looking for. 

 

I spent less time in searching that particular data bank, than I have on the Internet.  I would recommend using that system to anyone, who doesn’t have patience.  Being already tired of looking for the sources for this repot, I found it refreshing that I did not spent much time looking for the source I like.  The librarians were very helpful and courteous.  The facility wasn’t crowed and it was easy to move around in.  There were fewer distractions than the campus library.   I was surprised to see such a small facility so well equipped and staffed.

 

 

5.  Spiritual Olympics

 

 

SUMMARY

 

In the sermon, Spiritual Olympics, by Michael P. Audrus, he correlates spirituality and sports.  Mr. Andrus, points out that, “The Christian life is definitely not an initial spasm followed by chronic inertia.  It is a race, not a 100-yard dash.  Rather it’s a marathon that lasts throughout the believer’s life.”  The Apostle Paul is highlighted thought this sermon.  Paul was apparently a great sports fan. Or, at least he was well aware of the import part sports played in the life of the ancient Greeks.  No other biblical writer used more athletic metaphors and terminology, than Paul.  The athletic contests, Paul witnessed, left an indelible impression on him.  And he saw very specific application of them to the Christian life.

 

We are told that the Christian life is like a marathon race.  Both require rigorous training.  Just as it takes rigorous training, self-discipline and self-denial to be a good physical athlete, so it takes the same sort of dedication to be a spiritual athlete.  Using a metaphor, Paul says, “Not all of us are great boxers.  We make loud noises about our faith when we’re in church, but when we get out into the real world, the boxing ring, we never land a blow for Christ.  In fact, many of us are so ill-prepared we are a sitting duck for the sucker punches landed by those who deny the faith!”

 

Mr. Andrus, also believes that, both spirituality and athletics require playing by the rules, both yield a coveted prize and both necessitate extraordinary endurance.  The prize for the modern Olympics is a gold medallion.  Not so for the Christian runner.  They do it for a crown that will last forever.   Paul suggests that, God is looking for the steady climber, the growing disciple, the one who breaks through with a second wind, and third, a fourth, and so on. 

 

Reaction

 

First, I had to remember that I was reading this to do a paper.  Then, I had to read it again to formulate my reaction and opinion.  This sermon hits on all the points that I have been trying to cover for my report.  I was impressed with the way Mr. Andrus used different passages of the bible to illustrate his points.  He was also able to use his own experiences in explaining what he was talking about.  When he spoke, it was if you were sitting right in front of him and he was directing his thoughts right at you.  Yet, he didn’t speak down to you.  His words were uplifting and inspiring.

 

When he spoke about the Apostle Paul, he gave us a little history about where he came from.  I can’t stop thinking about the one quote:  “Most people, including Christians, are.. slaves to their bodies.  Their bodies tell their mind what to do.  Their bodies decide what to eat, when to sleep and get up and so on.  An athlete cannot allow that.  He follows the training rules, not his body.  I guess use my body in that way, however I am not aware that I suffer spiritually also.

 

 

Opinion

 

Yes, I agree with everything that was written.  It is hard not to, being a Christian.  When Mr. Andrus writes, “The road to life is as narrow as a cross.  It is the cross.  Jesus died for you.”  He paid the penalty for our sins and he offers us the free gift of eternal life.  He only asks us to put our faith and trust in Him.  That’s how we have to join the race.  You win by enduring, by preserving, and finishing strong.”  I have been so swept up in the American system of values, that I have almost forgotten mine.  This article helped me remember the things I were taught and raised to believe.

 

Mr. Andrus mentions that, for every day out of training, it takes 3 to get back to where one once was.  That is absolutely right.  For every day I am out, it takes me much longer to get to the competitive level I want to stay in.  I am very inclined to believe that all of his examples will strengthen anyone.  No greater words can be spoken, when Mr. Andrus says, “The Christian life is not a race to achieve entrance into Heaven.  We are saved by grace, not by effort or discipline or obedience or good works or anything else.  We are saved by believing, not by achieving.” 

 

 

SEARCHING REPORT

 

I found a lot of my research materials lacking in substance, so I decided to check out Google, one more time.  Only, this time, I typed in, “Spiritual athlete.”  I was rewarded with over 14, 000 searches.  I scanned through quite a few, until I came across this particular article.  I read through almost 20 of them before this one caught my eye.  I wanted something that would express not only one athlete’s opinion, but a majority’s.

 I had to read through this article three times until my mind focused on the similarities in athletics and spirituality.

 

Finding article on spirituality wasn’t a problem, I was trying to find something that I could relate to in and with my own experiences.  The, I had to be able to gather my thoughts, put a few of them down, then try to think just how I could write about something that would interest someone else.  I used road runner in getting through onto Google.  It was fast and efficient.  I would recommend it to anyone who is trying to get information in writing a report such as this.

 

 

I.  CONCLUSION

 

          Working on this report was rewarding and interesting experience.  I found it very significant because to live our life to fullest we have to be strong mentally, physically and spiritually.   We are all athletes in the game of life.  Spirituality should be an important aspect in our lives.  It is essential to find a harmony between body, mind and spirit in our lives.  Our existence is not just in our brains, it is a fine interaction between physical, mental, emotional and spiritual aspects of ourselves.  After a number of long hours spent on researching and writing this report, I found this effort valuable in the way that I realized that I have to focus on my spirituality with greater energy.  Hopefully, the readers of my report will realize the same. 

 

 

I.  REFERENCE SECTION

 

Andrus, M. (2001, April 8).  Spiritual Olympics.  [Online].  Available:

 

http://www.efree.org/sermons/1_corinthians/spiritual_olympics.htm

Hoffman, S. (Ed.). (1991).  Sport and Religion.  Illinois:  Champaign.

Lynch J. & Al Huang C. (1998).  Working Out, Working Within: The Tao of Inner Fitness Through Sports. 

New York, NY:  Putnam Book.   

Schmid, H. A. (1996, December 11).  The Spiritual Athlete's Path to Enlightenment.  [Online].  Available:

 

http://www.lehigh.edu/dmd1/public/www-data/holly.html

 

Smith, S. D. (2001, November10). Sports competitors put their faith on prayer.

 

The Gazzete. News Bank, Inc. [CD-ROM]. Record Number: 0031030F0094FC 1F044E

 

 

 
 

 

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☻☻The Differences between men and women in how they handle relationships☻☻

 

 

II.  INTRODUCTION 

In the second section of my annotated bibliography report, I am going to discuss the differences between men and women in how they handle relationships.  I used different sources to get my point across to an audience.  I want to broaden and expand your awareness about women issues.  While reading this paper, keep in mind, no two people are alike, and no two relationships are alike either.  We all come from different backgrounds, and have a variety of beliefs.  It was a challenge for me to write this report without being overly opinionated.  However, when you write about relationships, there must be some humor.

I have chosen this topic because it is essential for a success in a relationship that couple has awareness and understanding about these issues.  For a successful relationship both partners have to put effort and work on relationship.  Many relationships are ineffective because men are so insensitive.  Men and women are biologically different.  Also, we are raised differently from the begging of our lives.  Men are supposed to be strong and competitive, while women are supposed to be gentle and dependent.  The way in which men and women are raised leads to the major difference between them, their communication styles.  I hope you will enjoy reading my creation and possibly learn something from it. 

 

1.  We are different

 

SUMMARY

 

In the article, Baseball and Baby Dolls, written by, Annie Briggs, she states, “Contrary to a popular symbolic cliché, men are not from Mars, and women are not from Venus.  They are both from the Planet Earth, the same planet both share today.”  Ms Briggs points out that men can learn a lot from the women’s movement, as they have not had the option of choosing their own role in life.  “Lust is still instilled in boys as children, and love is still instilled in women as children,” she writes.  The world is changing and we no longer need a system of order, in whereas, men have their role and women have theirs.  She points out that people from the east coast have different attitudes than people from the west coast when it comes to preserving heritage, culture and religion.

 

It’s her belief that all harmful sexual acts, as well as sexual promiscuity in men, is a direct result of the intimacy men are deprived of in our culture.  She writes, “Women can also be affected by such stimuli but, it is less prevalent because society’s view of sexuality in women differs from that of men.”  She defines male fantasies as sexual, and women’s fantasies are relationship fantasies.  One point that was pointed out was, being who we are, requires that we talk openly about things that are important to us, that we take a clear position on where we stand on important and emotional issues and that we clarify the limits of what is acceptable and tolerable to us in a relationship.

 

 

REACTION 

 

The article by Annie Briggs, was well written and precise.  Each of her points was supported in detail.  I was surprised to find that the men’s role was so clearly clarified at such an early age.  I was appalled again when I read that men and women aren’t created equally. Social and physiological indifferences have prevailed since the birth of humankind.  Society is hampered by family values and sexist attitudes. It seems to me that continuity doesn’t exist between the two sexes. 

 

It reaffirmed my belief that men will always see women as sex objects to justify their emotionally shortcomings.  I wanted to ask the author how she could correlate the deprivation of intimacy, in regards to violent crimes.  That left a bad taste in my mouth.  I was also offended that the two female authors, that were quoted in Briggs article, would suggest that women should learn to accept less than what they are, instead of advocating change in traditional male roles.  From my perspective, we should be seeking common ground instead of accepting less than what we deserve.

 

 

OPINION

 

Men have a lot to gain by the women’s movement according to this article.  I strongly believe that men need to take responsibility for their own actions.  I think we should start instilling in our children, both male and female, that women aren’t sex objects.  We need to nurture our little girls, by building upon their self-esteem. Men limit their relationships with their own children and with women because of their weakness in the area of tenderness, warmth and sensitivity.  I think the only compromise we will accept is, we will not be emotionally feed upon.  Relationships cannot have role restrictions. 

 

Intimacy is the nourishment long sought after by women and secretly by men.  The source of nourishment that some men still fear as foreign ground but, live a ordinary existence without it.  I would like to see more feminists write about exposing all male flaws.  Not just the ones, they feel important.  I do, however; respect the feminist’s right to stimulate change in attitudes, with not only women, but men as well.  I believe sexual discrimination always exist until sexists attitudes are changed.  Then and only then, will relationships, be it work or domestic, began to work.

 

 

SEARCHING REPORT

 

I used the AOL search engine and it took me to the AOL hometown page.  I typed in “difference between men and women,” and it resulted in over 14,000 finds.  I just scrolled and clicked on numerous sites, until I found this particular article.  I had to read the whole article more than once to see if I could relate this to my specific topic.  I then copied and pasted this article in a word document, just to make sure that I could find it again.  I searched through 7 or more sites before deciding that this was the best choice for my research report.

 

By using AOL, I was able to get more subject matter than I had expected.  The ability to type in small phrases was very useful and easy.  There were a lot of articles to pull from, but I wanted to concentrate on something that had subject matter and meaning.  I wanted to write about something that I could easily relate to and then be able to discuss it with others.  I found this article to be suitable fit for my bibliography report.

 

 

2.  Macho

 

Summary

 

In the article, “Perspectives: Men, Latinos in particular face outdated notions of their roles in U.S. society today.  What is macho?,” written by Kim Lamb, she talks about what it means to be macho and how both Latino men and women perceive it to be.  Macho, according to Webster, is “overly assertive or exaggerated masculinity, especially as characterized by show of virility, domination of women, etc.”  Macho is an enigma, people know it when they see it, but they can’t really name it. When asked to define a “macho” man, 14-year-old Miguel Hernandez says; “When he doesn’t like women he hits them and stuff.”

 

Machismo stays alive because the learned behavior keeps getting passed down through generations of males.  Women who are in relationships with men practicing bad machismo are oppressed.  In extreme cases, “machos beat their wives. Wives, in describing men who cling to bad machismo, often phrase it in terms like, “He’s very traditional.”  Machismo is tearing away at the very heart of this ethnic group.  Yet, the more educated Latino men get, the less likely they are to embrace bad macho.

 

 

REACTION

 

I am in shock.  The very thought that one group of people who still believe that it is okay to put down and batter women, when they want, just to feel macho, is disgusting.  I had a hard time reading the article.  I understand that all peoples have struggles, but why, in this day and age, would anyone want a relationship with someone who believes in such backwards mentality.  I felt very sad to read that the women were justifying these actions by calling it, “traditional.”  It will be a long uphill battle to change this group’s view of point.

 

The one bright spot that caught my interest was a girl named Cortese, who was fighting to get out of this situation.  She realizes that this belief isn’t always present in the lower classes, nor does she say it never occurs in the upper classes.  She can’t change her background, just her education level, and her children’s way of thinking.  She is making a sincere effort to break the macho tradition.  She no longer accepts, “It’s my culture.”  Women like her will become great role models, not just for Latinos, but also for all women.

 

 

OPINION

 

I disagree with the cultural idea that it is okay to be “macho.”  No relationship can be based on one-sidedness.  Most of the opinions, of the males in this article, reflect just what women have been going through for ages.  I cannot nor will I, sympathize with this type behavior or reasoning in their treatment of women.  I do see where there have been great strides made in changing this hypocritical assumption.  I think men shouldn’t care what other men think of them or about them, when it comes to relationships with women. 

 

This article is very useful.  It is an article that women of all ethnic groups, ages, and educational backgrounds should read and study.  I think this article would inspire more women and men, to try to understand that sex discrimination and sexually bias, are both alive and well.  By reading this article, both sexes should be able to visualize themselves in their relationships, and make the appropriate changes.  I find this type of behavior to be repulsive.  With sexists views such as these, it makes me wonder where I would be if all men thought this way.

 

 

SEARCHING REPORT

 

I went to Hickam AFB’s library and used their data back, News Bank, Inc.  The computer system was very easy to use.  I typed in, “Differences in men and women in relationships.  I was rewarded with over 30 different subjects, in which there was numerous articles to chose from.  I clicked on the subject of “people.”  The computer displayed all the different articles on the left side by title.  And on the right, it displayed the specific articles in their entire text.  After viewing the specific article, all you had to do was hit the print button and in no time the article was printed.

 

I spent less time in searching that particular data bank, than I have on the Internet.  I would recommend using that system to anyone, who doesn’t have patience.  The librarians were very helpful and courteous.  The facility wasn’t crowed and it was easy to move around in.  There were fewer distractions than the campus library.   I was surprised to see such a small facility so well equipped and staffed.

 

 

3.  Mr. Clean’s buddies

Summary

 

In the article, “Mr. Cleans’ buddies find that chores have some rewards,” by Amanda Temple, she writes about sharing the cleaning duties in relationships.  Amanda is fascinated that one, Brian Schwartz is the one who is actually doing the house cleaning.  He doesn’t use the newfangled cleaners.  He is strictly a bleach and bucket, kitchen cleanser, elbow grease king of guy.  He splits the chores with his fiancée, Susie.  Susie says that sharing this responsibility has greatly enhanced their relationship.

 

Most men assume that going to work everyday is a demonstration of love.  But, with the results of the good job markets for women and men, there is an ever decreasing of time to do the household chores.  The article points out that the number of hours women spend on housework has dropped steadily since 1965.  While the number of hours for men during the same time have increased.  And it’s not just the young guys who are learning new cleaning tricks.  Women are also finding out that men are trainable even when they are advanced in age.

 

 

REACTION

 

This was one of the most refreshing articles I found to write about.  It was very easy to read and understand.  I had no problem understanding the subject content.  The characters expressed their thoughts with humor and honesty.  The data on the decline in the hours women spend on housework was informative.  Yet, the data on the increased hours men spend could have been higher.  I didn’t know you could train old dogs to do new tricks.  I found that very funny.  And, finally, I have read where has mother trained both of her sons to shop, cook, clean and do laundry.  This is the first article that has used an example of someone making a change in raising children.

 

 

Cleaning isn’t something anyone likes.  It is a chore that must be done.  No one wants to live in dirty surroundings.  And here we have two couples that not only enjoy cleaning, but share all of the other chores as well.  I found that by sharing these things, their relationships are greatly enhanced.  I wish more men and women could read this article and maybe get few hints.  I could only hope for something like this to happen to me. 

 

 

OPINION

 

I can only assume that the figures of hours that women spent cleaning are right.  I would have to do more research to find out more information about the accuracy of these statistics.  With new and improved cleaning products, it doesn’t take as long to clean an apartment as it once did.  With both men and women finding better paying jobs, they are also paying someone else to do the cleaning for them.  Allowing them, more time to do other things in their lives.  Yet, when two people share the duties the cleaning doesn’t take as long.

 

I think more men and women should share the duties of cleaning.  It is only fair when both individuals cohabitate.  More men should clean the bathrooms.  Women aren’t the only ones’ who use them.  More women should train their boys that cleaning is a responsibility shared, not expected.  More men should realize that it’s a turn on to a woman to have a man help with something she really hates to do.  The article shares a secret in that: more housework, better sex life.

 

 

SEARCHING REPORT

 

I went to Hickam AFB’s library and used their data back, News Bank, Inc.  The computer system was very easy to use.  I typed in, “Differences in men and women in relationships.  I was rewarded with over 30 different subjects, in which there was numerous articles to chose from.  I clicked on the subject of “couples.”  The computer displayed all the different articles on the left side by title.  And on the right, it displayed the specific articles in their entire text.  After viewing the specific article, all you had to do was hit the print button and in no time the article was printed.

 

I spent less time in searching that particular data bank, than I have on the Internet.  I would recommend using that system to anyone, who doesn’t have patience.  The librarians were very helpful and courteous.  The facility wasn’t crowed and it was easy to move around in.  There were fewer distractions than the campus library.   I was surprised to see such a small facility so well equipped and staffed.

 

 

4.  In the minds of Men

SUMMARY

In an article, “differences between men and women” the author Brenda Lee, read a book about men and found a few excerpts that bother her.  She takes what is one man’s fantasy in one part of the article.  Also, she found a disturbing realization in man’s justification as to why they do what they do.  When a man finally fulfills his long time fantasy with a woman his treatment, his attitude and character change towards her.  After his conquest, he is uncaring, cold and hostile.  Where did this beast come from? 

          In another part of the article, Lee finds men unable to deal with anger. She describes a situation where a man having sex with woman, is unable to understand a woman’s need to be sexually gratified.  She wants to know what are his thoughts; he wants to gather his thoughts.  His inability to understand leads to frustration and anger.  The author states that rage is a natural instinct for men, which they have to consciously work hard at containing.  While women are much more emotional and resort to crying.  She also realizes that when she became self-confident, she was able to unload unnecessary weight, both emotionally and physically.

 

REACTION

Brenda Lee is right when she was describing a man’s inappropriate view of women.  Men have a hard time talking about what is on their minds.  What bothered me the most, is the way a guy can so easily separate himself from a situation.  Most men I know, almost always pretend to be something they are not.  When they become mad, they can easily become violent.  I could not keep up with the content, later on in the article because she jumped from anger, to revenge, to defending this particular man.

I could really relate to some of the things that were discussed in her article.   I have had friends who had been in situations just like these.  I have had men come up to me, expressing boyish thoughts and displaying rude behavior.  I could easily place myself in the author’s thoughts and understand her pain.  Brenda expressed what bothered her and why.  I respect her for putting her thoughts into words.  It’s hard to put one’s true thoughts and feelings out into the world for all to see.  I could not stop reading the article once I had it in my hands.

 

OPINION

My final opinion is, I would like to have had more excerpts from the book to see what else made Brenda angry.  I didn’t have much to go on, except what she read to formulate a true opinion on my own.  Some of the things discussed did not necessarily upset me.  I don’t believe that all men and women reactions will be the same as Brenda’s.  Yet, most will.  Brenda was justifying her beliefs by describing her past situations.  She put herself out on a limb when she posted this article and people took advantage of that.  I found that hurtful.  It saddens me to know that people can be so cruel.

I have to agree that men’s thought processes are different than a woman’s.  After reading this article, I have gotten more insight into different people’s experiences and thoughts.  I still don’t understand why someone would resort to physical anger than expressing his or her feelings or thoughts.  Having a fantasy doesn’t necessarily mean taking advantage of someone else in achieving it.  Fear consumes me, when I read things like this.  But, without more subject content, I am left with just my opinion and Brenda Lees’ point of view.

 

SEARCHING REPORT

I searched for “differences between men and women,” on the AOL Browser.  It took me to the Google Groups.  There were over 378 search results for this topic.  After viewing for about two hours, clicking on one topic to another, I finally found one where it was one written by a woman.  It was disturbing to see that more men had written articles on this subject than women.  It was time consuming to read though all of the contents of each article.  Not all of the articles had enough substance for me to write about.

By using AOL, I was able to get more subject matter than I had expected.  The ability to type in small phrases was very useful and easy.  There were a lot of articles to pull from, but I wanted to concentrate on something that had subject matter and meaning.  I wanted to write about something that I could easily relate to and then be able to discuss it with others.  I found this article to be suitable fit for my bibliography report.

 

5.  HIS view

 

SUMMARY

 

I interviewed Calvin  Nixon, my good friend, to get his insight into relationships.  He is 40 years old and was married before, so I thought that he would give me good illustration of a man’s view.  When I asked him generally what is his view on relationships, Calvin stated he first had to find out who he was.  Without knowing that, he felt it was unjust to himself and his partner to start a meaningful relationship.  Calvin realizes his faults and strengths, but knows he has weaknesses.  Calvin believes women trust with their heart, mind, body and soul.  Where as, men on the other hand, rarely know the meaning of trust.  Calvin also stressed that communication is a big key in a long lasting relationship. 

 

With the advancement of women in the workplace, he says that men are still inconsiderate of women.  Whether, working with or working for women, he is more conscious of their presence.  Instead of, treating them as equals, he states, that women haven’t been treated fairly and that they have a long way to go for equal rights.  With women getting advanced degrees and becoming more involved in politics, their involvement will change some of the injustices.  But, unlike men who are more geared towards power in achieving a goal, women work with each other, understand the purpose, and march towards common ground.

 

 

REACTION

 

I was thrown a curb ball.  Here was this man talking away about understanding.  He still misses the point.  Calvin tries, don’t’ get me wrong, but I don’t want his pity about women issues.  I want his respect, period.  I kept looking at him to see if there was a hint of male chauvinism.  Yes, he has a few hidden one’s that I know of, but were not expressed during the interview.    Every now and then, he would stop, choose his words carefully, and then he would answer.  Calvin is very considerate and tries extra hard in being politely correct about women issues.  His depths of understanding women issues were higher than I thought before.

 

I thought, what better person to interview than the friend I enjoy being with. He has really high opinion and respect towards women. Being educated, having traveled throughout the world, and military background, I felt that his thoughts on his experiences, would provide me with food for thought.  I wanted to share his point of view with others.  His involvement with volunteer organizations shows his compassion and commitment to issues much greater than his own being.  He gives his time freely to those in need.  When I asked him, would he be willing to work towards a good relationship, he said, that he always puts an effort into this.  I just laughed.

 

 

OPINION

 

I didn’t agree with Calvin on every issue we touched on during my interview.  I listened to him, and tried to relate his views in terms of my experiences.  I agree with some of his beliefs, but some I don’t.  He can only talk about his experiences and past, of course, from a male’s point of view.  He has a much more understanding than most, but without being a woman, he can’t truly feel what it is like to walk in my shoes.  His communication skills are good, but he has trouble talking about his feelings.  Calvin thinks I am supposed to read his mind.  He’s just a man.

 

His opinion is very useful in what I perceived that I saw in him.  Calvin, not once mentioned his  relationship, which I thought was remarkable.  Calvin was able to separate himself to talk about issues that I found important.  I did not find this surprising.  His understanding of giving a woman a free space is uncanny.  He always thinks that she has enough free space.  I don’t agree with him about many issues.  Since he is a man, that was expectable.  He thinks he knows everything.  Yet, what man doesn’t.

 

 

SEARCHING REPORT

 

For this source, I decided to do an interview with a man, to get his opinion on women issues.  I did this interview because I thought it would be interesting to have the other sex’s point of view.  I thought to myself, what would make my interviewee talk?  How could I involve him?  I approached him by asking, what he thought about helping me.  I knew this would bring some type of uneasiness.  We spent almost an hour just talking about different issues, and then I gradually eased my questions into our conversation.

 

After a few straight-forwarded questions that directly related to his persona, he became awkward and remote.  It was if, his life was flashing before him.  I just kept asking questions that would relax him, and then I would sneak another one in.  I knew his inability to stay with one subject matter would play into my hands.  I even got up to get him something to feed his stomach, as I was draining his mind.  Our interview lasted one hour.  When I had enough information, I smiled, patted him on the back, and thanked him. 

(T. Nikolic, personal communication, October 1, 2002).

 

 

 

 

6.  He is just a man

 

Summary

 

In this article by Paul Mertron, on the “Differences between Men and Women, one basic truth exists: men and women are different.  Mr. Mertron states, “We are different—in our habits, and the way we react to environmental stimuli and the way we spend our leisure; and we are especially different when it come to our attitudes regarding relationships.”  He uses different settings and situations in explaining the differences.  He uses humor to as a method to explain the significant difference between men and women.

 

Mr. Merton admires woman, while she is out driving, and finds her in unfamiliar surroundings, she will stop at a gas station and ask for directions.  Men, on the other hand, consider this to be a sign of weakness.  Men would never stop and ask for directions.  They would rather drive around in circles for hours, all the wile saying things like, “Looks like I’ve found a new way to get there.”  Or, “I know I’m in the general neighborhood.  I recognize the Texaco’s.”

 

 

REACTION

 

My first reaction was loud laughter.  I needed to take a break from my studying and something funny to read, was just the ticket.  It was refreshing to know that after all this writing, I was still alive.  Mr. Merton writes, the average number of items in a man’s bathroom is somewhere around 6.  I know for a fact, my boyfriend has 8.  He leaves his socks and underwear in the corner.  Where as, the typical number in a woman bathroom is somewhere around 237.  Well, I don’t have that many, give or take 50.

 

It was nice to read an article that uses humor in relationships.  After writing on men and women differences, with serious implantations, this article fitted me and I hope my readers.  Mr. Merton states, women will sometimes admit making a mistake, but they usually try and make it look like it was the man’s fault.  Well, he is wrong.  It is always the man’s fault.  Us women only make mistakes in choosing our men.

 

 

OPINION

 

I disagree with his assessments on relationships.  He informs us that a man does not call it a relationship.  He refers to it as a romance, or a period of dating, of going out, or, in some unfortunate circumstances, “that time when we were just doing it on a semi-regular basis.”  He farther suggests, when a relationship ends, women will cry and pour her heart out to her friends.  I normally jump for joy and pour champagne for my friends.

 

I think that when it comes to relationships one must have some sense of humor.  This article would be very useful to break a tense moment or situation.  Not all men are bad and not all relationships are domed.  Though my own personal experiences, I have uncovered many significant differences between men and women.  However, there are times for humor and then there are times to be serious.  

 

 

SEARCHING REPORT

 

I went to Hickam AFB’s library and used their data back, News Bank, Inc.  The computer system was very easy to use.  I typed in, “Differences in men and women in relationships.  I was rewarded with over 30 different subjects, in which there was numerous articles to chose from.  I clicked on the subject of “humor.”  The computer displayed all the different articles on the left side by title.  And on the right, it displayed the specific articles in their entire text.  After viewing the specific article, all you had to do was hit the print button and in no time the article was printed.

 

I spent less time in searching that particular data bank, than I have on the Internet.  I would recommend using that system to anyone, who doesn’t have patience.  The librarians were very helpful and courteous.  The facility wasn’t crowed and it was easy to move around in.  There were fewer distractions than the campus library.   I was surprised to see such a small facility so well equipped and staffed.

 

 

 

II.  CONCLUSION

 

Taking into account all those long hours working on my annotated bibliography report about the differences between men and women and how they handle relationships, I came up with many conclusions.  There is no one fundamental view to look at it.  I believe that it is not worthy to fight against differences because every single person is different.  We have to realize and understand our differences and work on relationship with the same goals.  We should not generalize men and women because for an individual in relationship, the only importance is, his/her own partner.  This partner might not fit in that generalization.  We are all different individuals. 

 

However, it is true that there are differences between men and women generally and in how they handle relationships.  The differences are in how we think, what we think and how we react towards each other.  We must take a clear position on what type of relationship we want in our lives.  We have a long road ahead of us, in achieving equal rights.  The subject matter that I gathered was very informative.  It allowed me to support my reactions and opinions.  My different sources left me with a growing need to seek out more information.  It is important to understand our differences in relationships because without this understanding people cannot grow as a couple or an individuals.

 

 

REFERENCE SECTION

 

 

Briggs, A. (2002). Baseball and Baby Dolls. [AOL.  Available:  Http://hometown.aol.anniebrigg/

 

myhomepage/profile.html

 

Lamb, K. (2002, April 7). Perspectives:  Men, Latinos in Particular face outdated notions of their roles in U.S.

         

Society today.  News Bank, Inc.[CD-ROM] Record Number:  011770F2A1B1052D04E13

 

Lee, B. (2001, October 6). In the minds of Men [Online] Available:  http://groups.google.com/groups=

 

Merton, P. (2002, October 1). Differences between Men and Women [Online] Available:

 

http://paul.merton.ox.ac.uk.misc/menwomen.html

 

Nikolic, T (2002, October 1).  [Interview with Calvin Nixon]

 

Temple, A. (2002, May 15). Mr. Clean’s buddies find that chores have Some rewards. News Bank, Inc. [CD-ROM]

         

Record Number: 002760F38945BA6656821

 

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