Self-Witnessing Report on the Age of Rage
Personal Experiences of Rage

Charisse Ono
Psychology 409a
Spring 2001

Self Witnessing Rage
Shopping Rage

Introduction:

As a consumer I feel that I have had very pleasant interaction with the sales people at local malls.  That is until the weekend of April 6, 2001.  While shopping for a gift for my Mom for her birthday I stopped at a local music store.  I purchased a music book and a video.  Since I was not sure what the rest of my family members were going to buy for my Mom I asked the sales person what was the return policy was.  She stated that the music book would not be refundable but the video would be as long as I held on to my receipt.

The next day I decided to return the video.  With the receipt in hand I walked to two employees at the store.  One of the employees was wearing a uniform, I assumed he was a regular sales person.   The employee was a middle-aged woman where a floral blouse, I assumed she was the manager for the shift.  I began to explain to the manager that I wanted to do  return.  She then told me that "they do not do returns."  I was shocked that just yesterday a sales person told me that a return would be possible. I then explained that I was here the day before and the sales person told me about the return policy.  The manager then hesitated and told me, "Well, since I'm here I'll do the exchange... "  At this point I was rather irritated.  The manger began to shake the video cassette while she stood behind the counter.  As she heard a rattle noise from the heads of the video shaking she gave me a suspicious look and walked over to the rack of video cassettes to compare the rattling noise.  At this point my irritated was turning into frustration.

The manager then told the sales person to issue me a store credit.  I was surprised because I assumed I would be receiving my cash.  In a condescending voice the manager told me that was their return policy and pointed to a paper taped to the counter and the cash register.  At this point I was enraged.

Three step Method


Step 1: Acknowledge

The return policy of the this store was not the reason for my rage.  instead it was the poor customer service that I received at this place of business.  when I was a customer inquiring about a purchase I found helpful sales people willing to help me.  the next day when I was a customer inquiring about a return I received the worst customer service that I have ever received in my life.  As the manager began to shake the video, I became enraged!

Step 2: Witness

Sensorimotor
As the manger's realized that upon that visit to the store that I was not going to be a paying customer to the inquired about return her attitude toward me changed.  In response so did my posture and eye contact to her.  

Cognitive
Affective    
As this episode of rage occurred I thought how could a manger of a store treat the customers with such poor customer service.  I have had a part-time job in sales and thought back to my experiences.  In every incident I maintained an appropriate level of customer service.  While thinking of this I became more enraged because I never would have thought  a manager could serve a customer with such poor customer service. 

Affective
While the thoughts of poor customer service were running through my mind I became more aware of my rage that the frustrations of the managers.  At this point my main focus was on my needs and wants at that particular moment, getting my money back.

Step 3: Modify
Sensorimotor
During these episode of rage I attempted to maintain appropriate body position and eye contact with the manager.  In the beginning this was easier by as the conversation continued it was harder and harder for me to do so.

Cognitive
Toward the ending of this  this episode I attempted to calm my emotions down.  Through this my main point remained the same, that I wanted what I wanted, my money back.  About midway through this episode I came to the conclusion that if the manger knew my rage it would only make the situation worse.  By the end of this episode calmed my rage and left the store with a thank you to the sales person. 

Affective
In the end it was the love for my family that restrained my rage.  I truly did not believe that my Mom would want me to experience a fit of rage in order to get/ return her gift.

Summary:

Conclusion:

Through this experience I have come to the conclusion that the manager's poor customer service is comparable to how a child acts. At the page, Anger Tool Kit, Understanding the Goals of Negative Behavior, it  discussed what an adult should do when a child makes them feel annoyed/irritated and powerless/out of control.  In the following chart from the website it briefly what to do it that particular situation.

When I read this information I felt that it related to my experience with the store manager.  The left column explained what I was feeling.  On the right side it explained what I thought the manager was thinking.  By reading this website I found comfort in knowing the rage I experienced was not unheard of.

For more information of the topic of rage that occurs while shopping, see my Shopping Cart Rage section of by Report 1.

Self-Witnessing Observations:

Phone Rage
Pedestrian Rage

Discussion of Self-Witnessing Experiences