Computer Rage
Computers are necessary in society and they are useful. It does make life easier and communication is one of the greatest things. I have been using computers when it was called for and I have only had my own computer for two years. I understand the basic functions of a computer, but I admit I am still computer illiterate.
The incident occurred last school semester, which was fall of 2000. I was working on my computer and all of a sudden I started to smell something burning. I did not know what it was because it was not an actual fire burning smell. Then my screen starts to blank out and I am trying to figure out why. I try to turn my computer off and then on again. While my computer is trying to start again, I see smoke coming out of my monitor. I looked in the back of it and realized my monitor was burning out. The burning smell was all the wires inside of the monitor. I turned my computer off and just looked at it in shock. Then I got scared and started to unplug everything and I immediately called my uncle who programmed my computer. I had to leave a message and in the mean time I started to get mad. I told my roommate that I hate the computer and that it sucked. Then I got more mad because I had papers that needed to be typed and printed and I did not know when I would get a new monitor.
Another incident that occurred that same semester was an executable problem. I went on my computer and tried to go on the internet through Netscape. A warning sign would come on stating that something was wrong with the executable. I had no idea what that even was and I was completely lost. I tried to have my friend help me, but he could not fix it. He said I had to delete Netscape and reinstall it. I was extremely angry and I did what he said to do. I deleted Netscape and used Internet Explorer to download Netscape. The reason I need Netscape is that my email needs Netscape to configure attachments and all those other things. If I did it the hard way do not tell me because I only did what I knew how to do. The new problem I had was downloading Netscape. I was obviously doing something wrong because the computer would not download it. So, the whole time that I did not have Netscape I had to transfer my email to another email account. I was raging and every time I had to use my computer I would swear at it and tell it how much I hated it.
Step 1: Acknowledge
I acknowledge that rage was the only emotion I was feeling. My computer rage last semester was horrible. In the first incident I realized my rage after my phone call to my uncle. In the second incident I reached my peak anger when I found out my email attachments could not be opened and I had to transfer them.
Step 2: Witness
My sensorimotor behavior was all over the place. I was pacing the floor with my fists squeezing. My face was crunched up and I started ranting and raving about my computer. My arms would fly in the air as I was talking. I was talking loud and harsh and basically venting all my anger. Every time I had to check my email my rage would come back and I would start to pout and tell my computer how much it frustrated me.
My cognitive behavior was full of hateful thoughts. I constantly told my computer how much I hated it and I would break it if it did not start working with me. I dreaded going on the computer and having to deal with all the problems. The computer was a depressing place to go to and the mind frame I was destructive towards the computer and myself. I was destructive to myself because of how I would let my emotions get out of control and my thinking was not constructive.
My affective behavior was frustrated and extremely annoyed. I lost all patience in dealing with the computer problems. I hated my computer. I treated it roughly and I did not care if I made things worse. I wanted to get it fixed and was just waiting for it to work so that I could start doing my work efficiently. I was irritated of the whole situation and I was ready for the school semester to be over. Then I could take a break from my computer.
Step 3: Modify
To modify my behavior I become aware of my situation and deal with it in a productive manner. I need to stop and think before I let the situation go over my head. I need to realize what the problem is and find a solution effectively. If I would control my emotions then the situation could be resolved. By letting my emotions control me I become out of control and if the problems cannot be fixed right away then my emotions go through constant destructive cycle. I try to take things in stride with an understanding that computers can malfunction and they can also be fixed.
Home Self-Witnessing Observations Work Rage Pedestrian Rage Discussion
Class Home Page: http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leonj/leonj/leonpsy14/g14classhome.html