A Review of Emotional Intelligence in
Everyday Life
A Scientific Inquiry
Joseph
Ciarrochi, Joseph P. Forgas, and John D. Mayer
Psychology
Press, 2001
by bliss, Posted on December
10, 2002
Psychology 409b – Emotional
Intelligence – Generation 17
Dr. Leon James, Instructor: http://www.soc.hawaii.edu/leonj/leonj/leonpsy/leon.html
I. Overall Content
INTRODUCTION: IMPLICATIONS OF EMOTIONAL
INTELLIGENCE
The
book starts off by introducing us what is emotional intelligence, one of the
popular interests in the contemporary world, and what is significant about it. By so far, the positive effects of EI on our
lives have been discussed extensively in the media such as many books, popular
magazines, web articles, etc. First, the
author introduces some of the crucial implications of EI:
-
solves
the conflict between what one feels and what one thinks.
-
is
different from IQ and predicts success in life.
-
promotes
health, success, and happiness in everyday life.
The
rationale of the book is based on these implications of EI in our everyday life
and scientifically investigating it in order for EI to be true. It provides us with clear reasons for the
existence of EI, what the concept means, its relevance to our everyday life,
and how it affects our health, economic decisions, relationships, success in
career, etc.
1. Fundamental Issues
What is
Emotional Intelligence? (Chapter 1, P. 3-24)
The
first major topic of the book gives us a broad overview of EI and what has been
done in the study of EI. Two major
definitions of EI are introduced. The
first definition speaks of the general processing of emotional information and
skills related to processing. According
to the author and his colleagues, EI is:
“Emotional intelligence refers to an ability to recognize the
meanings of emotions and their relationships, and to reason and problem-solve
on the basis of them. Emotional
intelligence is involved in the capacity to perceive emotions, assimilate emotion-related
feelings, understand the information of those emotions, and manage them.” (Chapter
1, p.9)
In
contrast, the recent version of EI definition makes an emphasis on motivational
and social aspects of EI. The
traditional view of EI as the ability to understand and process emotional information
was integrated with other life skills.
“Knowing one’s emotions…managing emotions…motivating
oneself…recognizing emotions in others…[and] handling relationships.” (Chapter
1, p.9)
“An array of noncognitive capabilities, competencies, and skills
that influence one’s ability o succeed in coping with environmental demands and
pressures.” (Chapter 1, p.9)
The
entire chapter talks about how important it is to recognize the distinction
between these two EI definitions since two different ways to conceptualize EI
make some differences in the study of EI and its implications to our everyday
life.
In
either case, EI involves the capacity to understand, and use emotional
information, and most importantly, the author says that EI involves the
capacity of the emotional system which can enhance overall intelligence.
Measuring
Emotional Intelligence (Chapter 2, p.25-45)
In
order for EI to prove that it has an important role in predicting success in
life, we need to have a device to measure EI. The second measure topic addresses how to measure EI. The entire chapter talks about two kinds of
EI tests – performance measures and self-report tests. The former measures reflect actual EI while
the latter measures involve perceived EI.
The differences between the two EI measures reflect what people actually
do in a certain situation is different from what people think they would do in
that situation according to their emotional information.
In
other words, accuracy of perceived EI measured in self-report tests depends on
how much insight people have in their own level of EI. For instance, there is evidence of a modest
discrepancy between actual performance and self-reported emotion perception in
recognizing emotions.
The
book talks about how distorted responding can be a problem in self-report
measures. Validity and reliability scales
of the measures come into play as a solution.
Also, problems with the overlap with traditional personality measures (The
Big Five Factor Model) are also addressed in the chapter to make EI measures
more effective and accurate.
One
of the big questions asked in the book is whether EI can really predict success
in life. (Chapter 2, p.22) EI was once
said to be as or more important than IQ in predicting success in life.
(Goleman, 1995) The study done so far
shows little or no evidence to such claim.
Hence, we need to reexamine why EI is important.
The
chapter also talks about how the interest in EI has been manifested in many
organizational settings to predict good performance of people. The workplace has been integrating
self-report EI tests in the selection of employees. Empirically speaking, some of the findings have confirmed the
relationship between self-report instruments of EI and job performance.
Though,
EI measures are often found to overlap with traditional personality
measure. For instance, optimism
measured in self-reports predicts success among salespeople, etc. Disentangling EI from other measures is a
big issue in order to measure EI accurately.
The book addresses this issue by talking about EI in relation to
temperament – positive and negative affectivity.
The
relationships between self-reported EI, temperament, and life outcome are depicted
in the figure in the book. (Chapter 2, p.42)
The bi-directional relationship between EI and high positive affectivity
are both related to life success and high good mental health. In order to see the accurate effects of EI
on life outcomes, the book suggests the use of performance measures of EI since
they tend not to overlap with temperament.
As a result, it was found that performance measures do predict important
life outcomes; therefore, EI is confirmed to have some predictive power over
life outcomes.
What
the author concludes in this chapter is that emotionally intelligent behavior
is related to self-reports despite the fact that in general actual performance
and general intelligence do not correlated with perceived self-reported
behavior. There are some studies that
show the positive impacts of EI on behavior through training to be more
emotionally intelligent which leads to more adaptive behavior and improvement
in one’s mental health. The encouraging results convey that, after all, EI
predicts important life outcomes.
Affective
Intelligence (Chapter 3, p.46-63)
It
is needless to say the crucial role of emotions in our everyday decision-making
as we all have experienced such effects.
It conveys the important relationships between what we feel, what we
think, and how we act. Chapter 3
examines these relationships in consideration of EI and how it plays a role in
handling the relationships.
“Affective
forecasting” is one of the concepts based on the relationships between affect
and our everyday choices and how affect
leads to actual behavior through thinking.
We all make choices in consideration of future outcomes and emotional reactions
to such outcomes. Affective forecasting
refers to our tendency to focus on the salient features of emotional events and
ignoring other features.
Emotional
intelligent comes into play to avoid such misreading or underestimating because
EI allows us to consider all the possible emotional reactions including
negative and positive to the future event.
Also, it helps us accurately see the likely emotional reactions to such
event. EI is a tool with which makes us
skeptical to assess our emotions.
“Affect
infusion” refers to our tendency of thinking good when we feel good. The author says that its influence extends
to some cognitive functions such as memory, attention, decision-making, and thinking
styles of people. For instance,
negative moods are found to facilitate careful thinking with the reality-based
thinking than positive moods. In
contrast, when people feel good, they tend to interact and communicate with
others more effectively. (Chapter 3, p.54)
Obviously, its effect on behavior should be understood in relation to
social components.
Obviously,
the influence of affect on our everyday life is tremendous; it should not be
overlooked. (Chapter 3, p.49) The book ultimately
guides us to realize that the first step to be emotionally intelligent is to be
aware of the influence of affect on our cognition and behavior in social
settings. Emotionally intelligent
people are those who can distinguish the appropriate effect of affect. Knowing when and how such effects operate,
one can control emotional responses which mark crucial implications to social
life of people.
2. Applications of Emotional Intelligence Research to Everyday
Life
The
second major part of the book talks about in what ways EI applies to everyday
life settings of people based on the fundamental knowledge from the previous topics.
Emotional
Intelligence and Empathic Accuracy (Chapter 7,
p.113-132)
Throughout
the book, important implications of EI in social situation are expressed. The concept of “empathetic accuracy”-
reading people’s thoughts and feelings on a moment-moment basis (Chapter 7, P.
113) involves accurate, appropriate recognition of emotions in oneself as well
as others.
There
are two major roles recognized in any kind of relationship including friends,
dating partners, etc.: The perceiver and the target. The basic notion of EA is that getting to know the target better
allows the perceiver to be empathically accurate. In this process, it is important for the perceiver to receive
feedback from the target about their thought and feelings. This often works among people just started
to interact with each other. The more
they communicate, the more they gain to know each other’s emotions.
In
long-term relationships, EA is often thought to decay over time. Acting toward each other in a
stranger-oriented manner will therefore facilitate EA by paying more attention
to each other’s behavior during interactions and thinking more about each
other’s thought and feelings. Moreover,
being unwilling to express emotions or interpret emotions of the partner
interferes with maintaining high levels of EA.
The factor such as overconfidence, interdependence, strong emotional
involvement from the long period of their relationship also reduce EA.
So…. interestingly, EA is not always good for
relationships. There is evidence from
empirical work that EA might hurt marital satisfaction. The conditions in which EA is bad for relationships
are: irreconcilable differences, benevolent misconceptions, blunt unpleasant
truth. The greater EA leads the partner
to doubt and grow uncertainty of the relationship. For me personally, it’s the most interesting aspect of EA.
Though,
the basic assumption of EA is that it is good for relationships. Literature suggests that EA is featured in successful
marital relationships leading to positive outcomes. It is strengthened by significantly high correlations among
commitment to the relationship, willingness to accommodate the partner’s bad
behavior, and adjustment to the partnership.
Emotional
Intelligence and Education (Chapter 8,
p.133-149)
In
this chapter, the importance of social and emotional skills in addition to
intellectual skills is emphasized through the concept of “EQ”, the skills of
emotional intelligence. “The primary
principle of EI is that caring relationship form the foundation of all genuine
and enduring learning” (Chapter 8, p. 133).
What it is basically saying is that the promotion of EI benefit in human
interactions, and it parallels with the definitions of EI as three leading
researcher of EI, Mayer, Salovey and Goleman treat. In other words, EI is useful in any place where interpersonal
relationships are generated- schools, workplaces home, and other organizational
settings.
How
to enhance EI, therefore, is the primary concern for the interest in EI
research in recent years. For that
purpose, EI is emerged as a set of skills, and education is considered to be
the most effective means to enhance the skills related to EI. Learning emotional skills are found to benefit
in improved mental health, preventing problem behavior such as violence,
successful transitions from stressful situations, cultivating positive
attitudes, etc. It has profound effects
on humanity.
SEL,
Social-Emotional Learning, is emphasized crucial in educational settings as a
way in which students learn to be emotionally intelligent. It involves a set of skills that will enhance
school performance and social behavior. (Chapter 8, p.135) The SEL approach in educational settings
will benefit for children in social-competence, prevention of substance abuse,
high-risk sexual behavior, violence, smoking, suicide, etc. Many programs such as “Success for All (SFA),
CASEL, etc. are all to enrich the lives of children and promote well-being by
preventing problem behaviors through teaching EQ to children.
SEL
promotes knowledgeable, responsible, and caring students. Learning various skills including life
skills, positive social competencies, conflict resolution, and coping through social
support for transitions and crises, and positive contributory services.
The
roles of parents and teachers are also crucial aspects to facilitate SEL among
students. Their own EI levels and EI
skills must be recognized in order to promote EI to their children. In other words, learning SEL is a process which
involves learning that is facilitated in a whole community. It is therefore important for everyone to be
corporative to work together in the community for the sake of brighter and
happier children.
AFTERTHOUGHTS ON THE BOOK
It
seemed as if the chapters in Part 2 are designed to lead the reader to
understand how EI is related to our everyday life from individual (micro) to
general (macro) level concerns. First,
we learn the relationship between EI and mental illness and that of EI and
self-actualization. This seemed to be
discussed on the specific level. As the
topics extend from EI and intimate relationships, EI and EA, EI and education,
EI and workplaces, EI and health issues, and so forth, we seemed to gain an
understanding from specific benefits of EI at the individual level to general
benefits for groups at the community level.
Perhaps,
if I could raise a single common feature among all the topics we have dealt
with so far, it would be their relevance to our social life. EI is to help us create a better environment
for everyday life of human beings in every aspect. For instance, the integration of EI into education will make a
base for children to be effective adults through self-actualization, mental
well-being, empathy, good relationships, etc.
And in turn they would become the ones who make a better society to the
future. One benefit will bring another in
other aspect of our everyday life. EI
is like an umbrella that will embrace every aspect of social life.
It
was an enjoyable experience to read this book since I was not really familiar
to the topics I learned in the book in relation to EI, although I had been
aware of the important role of affect in our social life. Applying what I learned from the book to
myself, I became aware of my negative thinking style once again and how it has
been influencing my life choices and everyday decision. I really think that if I had learned these
skills to deal with my emotions effectively, I could have started seeing things
more positively.
I
recommend this book to anyone who is capable of understanding the content of
the book. (Obviously, I suspect that
most of the students in elementary schools are too early to read the book at
this intellectual level.) EI (EQ) is a
very useful tool that one can treasure in various aspects of social life
because it enhances psychological as well as physical well-being. Learning EI is therefore beneficial to
anyone.
II. The Book’s Importance
As
the field of psychology grows, we have come to realize that there are a lot of mental
problems that can be manifested in the minds of human beings. By introducing the concept of emotional
intelligence and its usefulness in everyday life, I think this book makes a
prominent remark on how we can improve and enhance the quality of our society where
there seems to be problems such as increased violence, unconcern for others,
emotional disattachment, etc.
With
today’s fast moving technological world, many of us are blessed with useful
materials and resources to live our lives more comfortably and efficiently. However, some are unable to find a meaning
out of their life since every thing is already given. In my opinion, whether it is unfortunate or not, having
everything can make one’s life quite passive and emotionally blunt.
Looking
back at the school days in my youth, I realized that education was already
served in front of me without requesting it, so did other children. There were many of my classmates who could
not find what they want to do with their lives, which appeared to be a form of
‘apathy’’; as a result, they did not seem to get themselves motivated and
energized, and this seems to be one of the prominent problems in younger
generations today.
In
consideration of that, one of the topics that I really would like many people
to read is the section on the relationship between EI and
self-actualization. I think it is very
important to have a purpose in one’s life, which a self-actualizing person does,
because it will lead one’s life toward the direction in which they can get the
meaning out of their being.
The
self-actualizing process is an active process in which we need to set our own
goals to achieve them, which in turn enrich the quality of our lives. It is also the process that involves
personal growth. To cultivate our own
potentials and make our lives grow to the fullest, we need to have a good
insight into our emotions. The four
abilities to be emotionally intelligent - identifying, understanding,
regulating, and expressing emotions, are therefore important before developing
your potentials and capacities to the fullest.
As
it is mentioned in the book, there is evidence that self-actualization is
related to our well-being and health issues.
I have thought of the increased use of Prozac and other anti-depressants
among many people today. Why are there
so many people who cannot shake their depression? I think that the vast technological advancement today have
created impacts on us. As we shifted
from agricultural to industrial states, it became possible for us to cultivate
our potentials because technology allowed us to have more opportunities, choices,
and more time for ourselves because we no longer have to worry about surviving;
as a result, many of us get lost in search for a meaning of life.
Those
who lack in skills in emotional intelligence can suffer not being able to
devote themselves in self-actualized ways since self-actualization is beyond
EI. So I think teaching EI can be
really beneficial to many people today, leading them to find their own goals
through getting a handle of their emotions and cultivating their
potentials. This active commitment to
their goals and attempt to actualize their potentials are acquired upon the
acquisition of emotionally intelligent skills, and that will eventually blossom
in their lives.
Another
section which caught my attention dealt with the relationship between EI and
empathic accuracy. Being aware of emotions
of oneself as well as others will definitely improve the social aspects of our
everyday life since human interactions are impossible to avoid in normal daily
settings.
As
many of us perhaps have experienced, establishing a good, caring, successful,
relationship takes mutuality, which includes understanding each other’s
emotions. Therefore, it is very
beneficial to know how empathic accuracy plays a role in establishing and
maintaining human relationships in relation to EI, which in turn enhance the
quality of life of the people in the relationship.
Respecting
not only your own needs but also others will lead to a deeper understanding
among the two in the relationship.
Understanding--- from my point of view, that is something all of us seek
for. I leaned in one of my psychology
classes that it is one of the fundamental human needs. Being empathized means being cared for. And it brings the warmth which is one of the
greatest feelings that human beings can experience.
Since
we cannot live without others and seek for others, it is obvious that EI can
make tremendous impacts on the lives of people by adding various positive ways
to handle their emotions in social interactions of everyday. EI is how you deal with your emotions – the
voices of your inner self - which are influenced by various external
forces. It is how you use the
techniques to deal with your emotions to enhance the quality of your life
despite the negative external forces.
It
would be probably very beneficial to society if EI can be understood in many
younger students. They are more likely
to pick up things quickly because they are in the process of development. I really want to recommend learning EI to
students who are developing toward being an effective adult in social
situations such as family, workplaces, etc.
III. The Book’s Structure
The
book starts with the introduction to the concept of ‘Emotional Intelligence’,
which I thought really a good approach.
As for myself, I did not know the clear definition of EI. The discussion on EI itself at the beginning
was really effective to facilitate an understanding of EI along with a
progression into more detailed, sophisticated concept of EI in relation to
other topics.
---Exercises
and Tests
After
the introduction, the book moved onto the discussions of how EI can be
measured. Since the book promotes the
scientific inquiry in demonstrating EI, the measurement of EI as one of the
beginning topics made sense. However, I
thought it could have been more generous to the reader if the book can provide
a couple of the examples of the EI tests.
Occasionally, some pieces of verbal accounts are given here and there,
but I found it hard to get a grasp of how it is done in a broader sense. Also, some exercises can be a helpful
facilitator of the book.
---Diagrams
and Figures
In
contrast, the use of diagrams and figures were very useful for the reader to
grasp some of the illustrated concepts in the book. For example, the effects of temperament and EI on important life
outcomes were demonstrated effectively using the directional diagrams (pg.42,
Chapter2). We can visually perceive the
directionality of the three elements, and I think this made the reader understand
the relationship more easily.
---Citations,
References, Index, Bibliography, End Notes, etc.
The
book also has a good citation style. We
can take a look at the reference section immediately according to the number
given in the bracket for each referred information. The references are listed separately by chapter, which is another
useful factor that allows us a quick, easy look-up of resources used in the
book. This is especially important
since it facilitates an effective literature review if the reader gets
interested in the study.
One
shortcoming would be that each referred information was sometimes represented
only by a number. If it gave the reader
the name of the researcher and the year the study was done, there might have
been more useful to the reader, giving a little more information so that they
can decide if they want to keep looking for the information.
In
terms of the use of index, there are two kinds of them. One is the Author Index, the other is the
Subject Index. I used the latter index
more than the former, and it has been especially useful in the process of
writing up this book review report. The
major keywords such as Emotional Intelligence, Affect, and Mood are broken into
smaller sub-topics which I found extremely useful. I found this index to be one of the places where the author
displayed his consideration to the reader and for the purpose of enhancing the
usefulness of the book.
---Print
and Layout
One
of the things that I thought the book could improve upon is enlarging the print
in some parts of the book, in particular, the Index section. Since it is a reliable feature for the book
to be used sufficiently, the print in references and index should be treated as
importantly as the actual book content.
If
making a distinction between book contents and references is necessary, I would
suggest that it would be more effective to enlarge the print of the whole book
so that the distinction will be retained.
I also thought that doing so could benefit a lot of students like us who
are studying the book, since a lot of us including me like to highlight and
draw lines into the book. Visually,
larger prints are more suitable for that purpose. So, practically speaking, more space between sentences, prints,
figures, would have been better overall.
IV. Critique of the Book
---Quotes
“Being emotionally intelligent requires a
degree of awareness of how and when multiple influences that affects has on
interpersonal behavior operate, as a first step toward controlling our
emotional responses.” (Chapter 3, p. 63)
I
like this passage because it addresses EI as a contributor to facilitating a more
understanding of the enormous influence of affect in human interactions. Since human exists upon social interactions
and we build our lives upon them, the role of emotions that is closely tied to
human life should be understood enormously.
I
also noticed that just simply being aware of the importance of emotions in our
every day life could be the most difficult thing to do since emotions are
attached to our everyday life so closely and routinely. Apparently, the book contributes to opening
our eyes to see the subtle yet enormous impacts from emotions, and I think that
it is the most worthwhile, reflective value of the book.
“EI and social-emotional skills are necessary
if our children are to grow up into adults who are going to be effective in
their families, workplaces and communities and are more likely to experience
positive physical and mental health.” (Chapter 8, p. 149)
I
think that this book has really good explanations of how and why EI is
important in our everyday life raising the issues in relation to workplaces,
schools, etc. I really like the idea
that EI should be integrated into education.
The
recent phenomena among youth observed in school shooting, increased substance
abuse, unprotected sex, teenage pregnancy, etc. seem to convey important
messages on how the youth today have problems with their self-control and
taking responsibilities of their own, including managing their won emotions. I think it would be really beneficial if we
can learn how to deal with emotions effectively from younger age.
---What
I Learned
One
of the most worthwhile experiences through the reading of the book is that I
gained the insight into the role of emotions in life. Emotions influence thinking, thinking influences behavior. Recognizing the threefold self in relation
to affect, cognition, and behavior, is the first and foremost important thing
to be emotionally intelligent. By
knowing how and when affect influences how we think and how we act in social
interactions, we can live our lives more effectively with sophisticated ways to
deal with our emotions through self-control.
---The
Strengths of the Book
I
think that this book is really good for those who do not have any knowledge
about EI to get a broad view of EI, its significance, and how it can be related
to everyday life. After given the
definition of EI, going by one topic to another, the reader can take a look at
EI from various different perspectives such as the educational, clinical,
social point of view, and so forth.
This allows the reader to progress from fundamental issues of EI to more
practical and sophisticated issues, demonstrating how beneficial it is to
enhance the quality of life using EI.
---The
Weaknesses of the Book
It
might be more helpful if the book can address some of the issues regarding how
authenticity of emotions can influence EI.
It is one of the things that called into a question as I read the
book. Can EI be used in a negative
fashion? Being nice to everyone
definitely takes self-control and EI; however, it is uncertain that it has any
different effects from being truly nice in action.
I
also found that some of the topics in the book did not have specific
explanations. For instance, in the
section regarding the relationship between EI and education, although the author
gives some of the programs such SFA and the Child Development Project (Chapter
8, p.137) that have been practiced in schools, it did not address what and how
they do to enhance EI among children.
It
is no doubt that the concept such as EI cannot be explained everything in just
one book. I think the contribution of
the book giving the reader a broader view of EI should be credited although it
lacks in depth here and there. In that
sense, the book might not be appropriate for people who are already educated in
EI but I think as far as the novices of EI are concerned, particularly for the
general public, the book does provide excellent information on what EI is, how
it is used, and why it is important.
---Links
These
are the web resources that I found useful to have a general idea about what EI
is and what it means to our society.
The following will hopefully provide you with the relevance to many
aspects of EI in relation to our everyday life.
Emotional
Intelligence in Schools: http://www.connected.org/learn/school.html
The website
of Consortium for Research on Emotional Intelligence, organizations that
promote high quality research on the application of emotional intelligence in
organizations: http://www.eiconsortium.org/
Test
emotional intelligence with a quiz that discusses love, anger, hate, jealousy,
fear, rage, and sadness: http://www.helpself.com/iq-test.htm
Practical
information on emotional intelligence and its importance to society: http://eqi.org/
A
book review on Goleman’s book “Emotional Intelligence”: http://www.sciencebookguide.com/book.html?book=33
V. Additional Observations
What
I have found a bit disturbing to me about the book is that there are not much
cultural issues mentioned. It is true
that the study of EI is still in its early stages, but I strongly think
cultural issues should not be ignored since different cultures have different
values attached to emotions, ways to express emotions, and ways to perceive
emotions. I have come across questions
such as how differently EI is integrated in everyday life between an
individualistic society and a collectivistic society.
Considering
my backgrounds as an Asian collectivistic culture origin, I am a little
skeptical about EI. In collectivistic
society, it is believed that compassion and consideration for others are as
important as own. Sometimes the need of
others can come ahead of that of oneself, and such phenomenon is not unusual at
all for many collectivistic cultures.
This
‘interdependence’ seems to be related to some of the issues the book discusses
in the chapter on empathic accuracy. In
interdependency, it is very important for one to recognize and understand
others’ emotions, which is said to be one of the crucial aspects of being
emotionally intelligent.
Individualistic cultures, which seem to advocate pursuing their own
needs before others, therefore, might have more influence on people by guiding
them to lean toward the self rather than others. Then I came up with a question, “Are there more emotionally
intelligent people in collectivistic societies?” It might be an interesting issue to study in the further future
research in EI.
---EI
and Everyday Life
From
this book, we learn that EI can be applied to various aspects of our everyday
life. EI enhances our flexibility,
creativity, and productivity, by dealing with emotions effectively through the
awareness of the threefold model of the self.
Overall,
EI, therefore, clearly have some significant implications in predicting
important life outcomes, as the book suggests at the beginning. Furthermore, since emotions often convey
important information, it is understandable that attaining high ability to be
aware of the processing of such information is considered to benefit in many
situations such as schools, workplaces, etc.
EI
brings emotional richness in our lives.
This is the first and foremost value of the book which, I think, everyone
can be benefited. Not only that, EI can
be work as a means to cultivate one’s spiritual, psychological, physiological well-being.
I hope more people would read this book
and gain insight into their own emotions to be emotionally intelligent.
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