| My Oral Report | ||
| Pg. ix – 12 | ||
| Emotional Intelligence | ||
| Daniel Goleman |
Table of Contents
Overview of My Report
The pages that I read basically described what the book Emotional Intelligence was all about and about why people have emotions and their impulses to act on them.
Preface:
Aristotle’s Challenge
This section was basically about how the news reflects a creeping sense of emotions out of control in our lives and the people around us. Happiness is an emotion that can be spread, but people rarely spread it. During the last decade there have been reports portraying an uptick in emotional ineptitude, desperation, and recklessness in our families, communities, and collective lives. There has been a jump in depression around the world and a surging tide of aggression. For example: Teens with guns in school, freeway mishaps ending more violently than they need to, and disgruntled employees killing former coworkers. People today are having a hard time controlling their emotions. Becoming angry and acting upon their emotions is easy. But controlling your emotions is the hard part. In the words of Aristotle, "Anyone can become angry – that is easy. But to be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose, and in the right way – this is not easy". There is an onslaught of mean spirited impulses in people today and they are acting on those impulses. This book, Emotional Intelligence, is a guide to making sense of the senseless.
Why This Exploration Now
The last decade has seen a burst of scientific studies of emotion. Glimpses of the brain at work have been made possible by new brain imaging technologies. Neurological data lets us understand how the brain’s centers for emotion move us to rage or to tears. Up until this last decade, emotions were largely unexplored. But now science is able to speak with authority to questions about mapping out the human heart. This mapping offers a challenge to people with a narrow view of intelligence, arguing that IQ is genetic and cannot be changed by life experiences, and that destiny is fixed by these aptitudes. The difference between people with high IQ’s who flounder and people with modest IQ’s who do well is emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence includes zeal, self-control, persistence, and the ability to motivate oneself. These skills can be taught to children to give them a better chance to use the intellectual potential they have. Emotional intelligence is important when selfishness, violence, and meanness of spirit seem to be rotting the goodness in people. Our times call for two moral stances: Self-restraint and compassion.
Our Journey
This book is a journey through scientific insights into emotions. The journey’s end is to understand what it means and how to bring about emotional intelligence. The journey begins with new discoveries about the brain’s emotional architecture that offer explanations of those moments when our feelings overwhelm our rationality. The next step in the journey is seeing how neurological givens play out in emotional intelligence. Part three looks at some key differences this aptitude makes: how toxic emotions put our physical health in as much danger as smoking, how these abilities can preserve our relationships, and how forces in life are putting an unprecedented premium on emotional intelligence for on-the-job success. Part four shows the emotional intelligence lessons we learn as children at school and at home and how they shape the emotional circuits. Childhood and adolescence are critical periods for setting the essential emotional habits that will govern our lives. Part five explores the hazards that await those who grow to maturity and fail to master the emotional realm. One idea to teach emotional intelligence is a new vision or what schools can do to educate children, bringing together the heart and the mind in the classroom. The journey ends with visits to innovative classes that give children the basics of emotional intelligence. The main question is how can we bring intelligence to our emotions, and civility to our streets, and caring to our communal life?
Part One: The Emotional Brain
What Are Emotions For?
Our deepest feelings, our passions and longings, are essential guides in our lives. Our species owes a lot of its existence to their power in human affairs. Our hearts win out over our heads in crucial moments. Our emotions guide us in facing predicaments and tasks too important to leave to intellect alone. For example situations that involve danger, painful loss, persistence despite frustration, bonding, or building a family. An example that was given in the book was the last moments of Gary and Mary Jane Chauncey. They were a couple that was completely devoted tot heir daughter. She was confined to a wheelchair. The Chauncey family was on a train ride that crashed. The couple made sure that they saved their daughter regardless of what would happen to them. An evolutionary perspective suggests that this parental sacrifice is in the service of "reproductive success". Feeling counts every bit as much as thought does. Intelligence can amount to nothing when emotions are absent.
When Passions Overwhelm Reason
Automatic reactions have become etched in our nervous systems because for a long and crucial period in human history they made the difference between life and death. Despite emotional constraints, passions overwhelm reason all the time. Our appraisal of every personal encounter and our responses to it are shaped by our distant ancestral past that can leave us with sometimes tragic outcomes. For example, in the book Bobby Crabtree’s automatic reaction cost him his daughter’s life. His daughter, Matilda Crabtree was playing a joke on her dad. She was supposed to be staying at a friend’s house, but came home early. She hid in her closet and prepared to surprise her dad by jumping out at yelling "Boo!" Her dad heard noises from her room and went to get his gun because no one was supposed to be at home. Bobby went to Matilda’s room to investigate and shot his own daughter when she jumped out of the closet to surprise him. Matilda was shot in the neck and died twelve hours later. We often confront dilemmas with an emotional repertoire tailored to the urgencies of the past.
Impulses to Action
All emotions are impulses to act. Each emotion plays a unique role n preparing the body for a response:
These biological propensities to act are further shaped by our culture and out life experiences.
Our Two Minds
Our mental life consists of two minds: 1) one that thinks, and 2) one that feels. The rational mind (the one that thinks) is a mode of comprehension we are conscious of. The emotional mind (the one that feels) is impulsive and powerful. These two minds operate in harmony for the most part. There is a balance between these two minds (Emotions feed into and inform the operations of the rational mind, and the rational mind refining and sometimes vetoing the inputs of emotions). But when passions surge the balance tips and the emotional mind has the upper hand. The arrangement between the two minds seems to stem from years of evolutionary advantage to having emotions and intuitions guide out instantaneous responses in situations where our lives are in peril.
How the Brain Grew
The main point of this section is the history of the brain and how it evolved to what it is today, and why we behave the way we do. A lot of our reactions evolved from our sense of because that sense helped us to survive. It helped us sense danger, helped us to decide what kinds of food to eat, and it gave us a sense of reproduction. Every living thing has a distinctive molecular signature that can be carried into the wind. From the olfactory lobe the centers for emotions began to evolve. One layer of cells took in what was smelled and sorted it out into categories: edible or toxic, enemy or meal, or sexually available. A second layer of cells sent messages throughout the system telling the body what to do: approach, bite, flee, etc. The limbic system evolved after that. This new neural territory added emotions to the brain’s repertoire. The limbic system refined two powerful tools: learning and memory. These advances allowed an animal to make smarter choices for survival. The neocortex in humans is much larger than in any other animal. It is the seat of thought and it contains the centers that put together and comprehend what the senses perceive. This new addition to the brain allowed the addition of nuance to emotional life.
My Overall Reaction
My overall reaction to my reading was that I agree that if people understood how to be emotionally intelligent, there would be a lot less aggression, selfishness, and irrational behavior. But although I agree with that, I don’t really know how I feel about many of the things that Goleman said about the brain and how and why we have the emotions we do today.
I learned that being emotionally intelligent is important for survival. This is of interest to me because I don’t want to get hurt or to hurt anyone else just because I was acting irrationally without really thinking about what I am doing. I feel that this would be of interest to practically everyone because who wants to get hurt or hurt someone? I think that this is of particular interest to drivers because a lot of the time drivers act without thinking and this causes many pointless accidents to occur. If drivers learned about emotional intelligence and how to improve it, I am sure that there would be a lot fewer accidents.
One concept that I learned is that there are two minds: the emotional mind and the rational mind. The emotional mind deals with feelings and the rational mind deals with thinking. They are normally in balance but when passions surge the emotional mind always has the upper hand. Another concept that I learned was that emotions are impulses to act. When you feel a certain way (angry, happy, etc) it makes you behave a certain way.
I find these two concepts interesting because they apply to everyone, especially drivers. If drivers can control their two minds as well as control their impulses to act, the roads would be safer for everyone.
Questions
Tara Anthony
I think that people would not be better off if they did not have emotions influencing their decisions. I feel that people need both their rational side as well as their emotional side when making decisions. Because if people used just one type of thinking (with their mind or with their hearts) then their decisions would be on the extreme end instead of being sensible and well thought out.
I don’t think that it is realistic to feel that anyone could have complete control over his or her emotions. Having complete control over our emotions would mean that we could control all of our feelings. But if someone close to you died, I don’t think it would be possible to make yourself not feel sad. I think that there are just people who handle themselves and their feelings better than others, but not people who have control over their emotions.
Argyle Bumanglag
Yes, I believe that you should start at birth. You may not be able to really teach the children when they are that young, but the children will take in all of your actions and behaviors and they will always be learning from the people around them. So if the people they are around are emotionally intelligent, then they will also learn to be emotionally intelligent.
I think that if someone who has already taken a class dealing with emotional intelligence could maybe offer classes to the people in their community. And I think that the more people are exposed to it, it will eventually spread and soon everyone in the community will be aware of emotional intelligence and how to acquire it.
Isabel Chang
I think passion often overwhelms reason because people feel with their hearts, not their heads. And when you feel very strongly about something, you will most likely use your heart instead of your head. Like if you are really in live with someone, you may do things that you wouldn’t normally do because of the way you feel. So your passion for the person would overwhelm the reason you had in your mind.
I think that drivers tend to be more emotional on the road. I think so because of all the cases of road rage that you hear about. If drivers were more rational, I don’t think that there would be as many accidents or mishaps ending in shootouts.
Leena Dwiggins
I would like to see emotional intelligence taught through modeling by parents and teachers. It could also be taught in the classroom by having teachers present different situations and having the children react to them. I think that emotional intelligence teaching should begin at birth and continue throughout life.
Unfortunately, I see our evolving as more negative. I think that it will be more negative because I don’t think there are people that care enough in the world about emotional intelligence and there are no real positive role models out there for younger children to look up to and want to be like. The role models today are wrestlers and other famous people who swear a lot and drink beer. I think that if more people cared, then we may become more positive in the future, but for now I don’t think that people really think about stuff like being emotionally intelligent.
Lynne Faylogna
I think that there are situations, like before an accident, that we can’t really think about what to do. All we have time for is to react. I think that it depends on the situations and whether or not we have time to think about the consequences of our actions. If we have two seconds to react to something, then I don’t feel that we can really think things out and we just react to anything negative. But if we had an hour to react to something, I am sure that we would not act as quick on our negative impulses.
Anthony Guerra
I think that if the child is older then the parents behavior wouldn’t really matter as much as if the child were young. Young children are influenced greatly by what their parents do, so I think that it just depends on the child’s age.
I think that they can use them both, but it is just hard to maintain a balance when making decisions because emotions normally tip the scale when the decision is very important to the person. I think that it would just take a lot of control.
Amy Hayashida
I don’t think that there is a way to keep them in harmony, they just usually are except when situations come along where the emotional mind takes over. I think that you just have to try to calmly think things through and try to use the rational mind as much as possible to try to keep the balance during tough times.
Dr. Leon James
I think that people react too quickly because they get caught up in the moment and their feelings are so strong that they just act upon them. Then later on, when they actually think about it, they regret their actions and think that they acted too hastily. When people feel really strongly about something, they tend to overreact when something goes wrong. But later on down the road after everything is said and done, they think that they acted stupidly. I guess that people’s feelings just get the best of them. I think that teaching people to sit and really think things through before they act upon them can prevent this. I think that if people just thought more about the consequences of their actions that they would not react so quickly.
I think that the emotional mind takes over whenever there is something that means a lot to a person. Anytime strong feelings are involved, people’s emotions usually get the best of them. Like with a loved one or with a job. I think that emotions don’t take over when people don’t really feel much for something. If you don’t feel a lot for something then your emotions would take over because you don’t really care in the first place and you won’t be really affected by it. I think that you should deal with it in a similar manner to dealing with reacting too quickly and regretting it later.
Janice Kamm
I think that culture shapes our actions/emotions because the culture we live in shows us how to react to certain situations and how to behave. Every culture handles things differently and so depending what culture you grew up in will affect and shape the way you feel about certain things and the way you handle those things.
Cindy Melo
1. Should an emotional intelligence class be a part of children’s cirriculum? If so, at what age should the class be taught?
Yes, I think that an emotional intelligence class should be a part of a child’s cirriculum. I think that it should start in preschool and just get more complex up until high school.
Tomoko Seino
I think that we could just give support to each other and remind one another to not act too quickly when making decisions. I think we could talk things out and try to use both our emotions and our minds when making decisions. Giving input to each other could help others see things from a different point of view. Maybe people could attend classes together and just in general be there for one another.
Robby Solmssen
I think that the two minds are integrated because when making decisions, people try to think rationally and emotionally. It’s just that the emotional part usually wins.
I think that that is what the author is trying to say. I think that he feels this way because of the complexity and size of our brains.
Sandy Uyehara
I think that automatic reactions are dangerous because you don’t have enough time to think about the consequences of your actions. For example, the story in the book about the man who shot and killed his daughter who was hiding in the closet and jumped out to surprise him.
I think that emotions are related to aggressive driving because a lot of the time when people are driving aggressively then are feelings some kind of emotion that is making them drive that way. Like maybe anger or frustration.
James Yang
I don’t think that there are any set conditions where you’d use either. I just think that if you felt that one side was outweighing the other that you’d try to incorporate more of the lesser one. Like if you were really emotional about a situation, you could try to use your mind a little more instead of just going with your heart and vice versa.
My reaction to my presentation was that I feel I could've done better, but I was extremely nervous because I had to give the very first presentation and I had nothing to base it on. I also got nervous during the question and answer period because the section that I read did not give many answers. It just explained a lot of things. I normally get nervous when I have to speak in front of people in the first place, so the question and answer portion of the presentation scared me a little. But now that I know what to do and what to expect, I am sure that I will have a much easier time with my second presentation.
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