Emotional Intelligence in Everyday Life: A scientific Inquiry is not just a book about Emotional Intelligence but about what it is, how it affects us, and how to attain it.  In order to relay information on EI in the most effective way possible the authors of this book broke it down in to three main parts and further divided in to chapters.

Part I: Fundamental Issues - Part I introduces the reader to Emotional Intelligence and gives some background information on EI.  In the early 1900's when EI was first introduced the psychology it was considered separate from intelligence or IQ.  Slowly EI began to receive more recognition and how emotion and thought or intelligence influenced each other.  As more time passed EI became a topic that was studied separately from thought.  During the most recent years EI studies have become "popular" and further research is being done. 

Chapter 1: A Field Guide to Emotional Intelligence - The is chapter answers the questions, ?How did the field begin (and how was it popularized)?  Which EI are we talking about?  How is EI best measured?  Is EI the best predictor of success in life? and Why is EI important?

Chapter 2: Measuring Emotional Intelligence - A constant problem in psychology is determining whether a topic of study is of value and can be tested reliably, this is also so with EI.  This chapter discusses the how EI is measured and the tests that are used to measure it.  Some of the tests that are used is the Multifactor Emotional Intelligence Scale or the MEIS.  The MEIS is reliable over all but the MSCEIT or Mayer-Salovey-Caruso Emotional Intelligence Test was designed to assess some of the problems with the MEIS.

Chapter 3: Affective Intelligence: The role of Affect in Social Thinking and Behavior - People sometimes react to certain situations and have no idea why.  This chapter attempts to explain the effect of affect on peoples thoughts and behaviors

Part II: Applications of Emotional Intelligent Research to Everyday Life - EI affects us constantly in most situations, because of this, part II of this text attempts the explain how people apply EI in different environments and different relationships.  It also attempts to explain how EI plays a role in some forms of mental illness.

Chapter 4: Low Emotional Intelligence and Mental Illness - There has been on going research as to what factors cause mental illness.  There have been a numerous amount of theories that have been backed by research.  This chapter explains how low EI could be a factor in some mental illnesses and psychiatric disorders such as eating disorders, drug abuse and alcoholism.

Chapter 5: Emotional Intelligence and Self-Actualization - 

Chapter 6: Emotional Intelligence and Intimate Relationships - We all want or have some kind of intimate relationships.  There are times when problems arise and nothing seems to iron out kinks.  This chapter discusses how people in an intimate relationship specifically married couples can effectively communicate by strengthening their EI skills.  Although this chapter is directed more towards the married couple it can also be applied to those who are not married.  The key ideas here are that we first understand what EI is, how we perceive and communicate emotion, understanding and reasoning with emotions and how to manage and regulate them.

Chapter 7: Emotional Intelligence and Empathic Accuracy - I'm sure that you have been told, told someone or heard of a situation in which someone has said that they aren't mind readers.  Fact of the matter is that EI people are in a sense able to read minds or at least have the ability to infer.  This chapter discusses how to be empathetic and attentive to the feelings of others and how to effectively communicate you own feelings.

Chapter 8: Emotional Intelligence and Education - Children are our future, and we need to equipped them with the necessary tools to survive and thrive in the real world.  EI education is a tool that can effectively help them manage their emotions and communicate them in the most effective way possible.  This chapter discusses educating children with EI. 

Chapter 9: Emotional Intelligence in the Workplace - EI can be used in all levels of business, from corporate management down to the maintenance crew.  Effective handling your emotions and being able to empathize with those around you will make the work environment a pleasant place to be.  In to days world we spend most of our time with the people we work with.  It makes sense that we try to make that environment the best it can be.  This chapter discusses how EI can be used in the work place when interviewing applicants, communicating with employees and working with co-workers.

Chapter 10: Applied EI: Regulation Emotions to become Healthy, Wealthy and Wise - Although EI is good for relationships it is also a way to keep healthy and stress free.  In this chapter we see how EI people report fewer incidence of doctor visits  and have lower stress levels than those who have a lower EI.  It seems that those who are able to regulate their emotions are physically healthier than those who aren't

Part III: Integration and Conclusions - The last section of the text is based primarily on Robert Sternberg who sums up most of what is in the text.

Chapter 11: Measuring the Intelligence of an Idea: How Intelligent is the Idea of EI?  This chapter discusses the value of studying EI.  They determine its value by holding it up to three criteria: analytical value, intellectual value and practical intellectual value.  The conclusion given by Robert Sternberg is although not perfect, EI does fit the criteria for a valuable area of research.

When you arrive at school, you encounter office workers, professors, and other students with whom you interact.  There are times when EI would enable you to be patient, have empathy and understanding for the office workers who send you to 10 different offices before you can pay your fees.  Then there are the times when EI will allow you to effectively regulate your feelings when the professor, who the class unanimously agrees, does not give clear instructions, gives you a failing grade on your exam or paper.

When you get to work after a hard day at school there are times when we encounter the co-worker who is absolutely loved by the boss but does absolutely no work.  Being EI individuals we are able to look ?from the inside? rather than just ?from the outside? and effectively regulate our emotions.  Everyone has a boss or superior who just pushes their luck with you but because you are EI you are able to handle the situation with the experience of a person who has extensively studied and mastered EI.

Later, at home, EI enable you to deal with the parents who drive you absolutely crazy for reasons that you gave up counting years ago.  Finally the ?other half? and the kids who like your parents, dive you insane but EI enables you to deal with their feeling and your feelings in the best, most effective manner.

It is apparent that EI effects us, the public, everyday.  I'm sure there are situations which I have not mentioned in which EI plays a factor in our lives as well as the lives of others in society.
 
 

It seems evident that the media plays a large role in affecting the EI of children.  Children as well as teens are constantly watching television, playing video games, reading magazines and listening to the radio.  The content of those venues of entertainment can, at times, be inappropriate.  As much as I hate to admit it, children learn a lot from what they see, hear and read in the media.  Many times those forms of media teach children that all our problems can be resolved in a 20 minute time period because most sitcoms tell them so. 

As adults we think that we are not susceptible to those kinds of influences, that we choose but the fact of the matter is, we don't.  We are influenced by the societal norms.  The media tells us what we should eat, how we should dress, what we should look like and so on.  These kinds of influences give people a distorted view of people, places and relationships.  It causes them to have expectations that are not real.
 
 

Emotional Intelligence is important not just in our lives but in the lives of everyone in society.  The twenty first century is full amazing things; computers, cellular phones and flights in to space and amazing people like; Tiger Woods, Michael Jordan, Mia Hamm, yet more abundant are self help books, drug and alcohol programs, increasing prison population, teen pregnancy, murders and homeless.  Why is this so?  I am by no means saying that EI can solve all of these problems but it is a start.  To date, our schools have taught children many things most of which groom them to be intelligent, musically inclined and athletic.  We have failed to educate them in EI, a tool that is needed everyday even during the early years of development.  Perhaps if we educated our children on how to effectively handle anger and frustration, empathize with others and be understanding individuals they wouldn't turn to drugs, alcohol or deviant behavior in order to cope. 

Most of the people in society who turn to deviant acts or self destructive ones report some kind of emotionally straining incident, a relationship gone bad, mistreatment, abandonment, loneliness or a negative self image.  EI deals with all of these issues by guiding the person to regulate their feelings instead of holding it in or releasing it at inappropriate times.  It is an effective tool for everyone from children to adults alike.

The text did not provide any exercises or tests for us to take but I shall describe some of the tests used to measue EI. 

There are two main types of tests which measure EI.  The first kind of test is the performance test  which is scored using a set scoring method and the second is the self report questionnaires which is simply a report of the persons individual answers to each question.  There are a few different types of performance tests, the most widely used is the Multifactor Emotional Intelligence Scale or the MEIS.  It is a fairly lengthy test which involves 4 different branches.  It is a reliable test which measures emotional perception, understanding and the managing of emotions.  A person who scores high on the MEIS is said to be high in EI whereas a person who scores low on the MEIS is said to be low in EI.

The Mayer-Salovey-Caruso Emotional Intelligence Test or MSCEIT is another type of EI test which only measures the ability a person has to understand and manage their emotions.  The reason for the limiting measure is that it was designed to test some of the areas that the MEIS did not.  This test is not as lengthy as the MEIS, although long, and has a shorter version which is used by professionals and researchers who don't have the time to administer a for a long drawn out test taking process.  Although the MSCEIT is shorter it is more accurate measure of EI or EQ.

Bar On Emotional Quotient Inventory or the EQ-i is a self report test which contain 12 subsets.  Some of the subsets that the EQ-i includes are emotional self awareness, assertiveness and independence.  This test has shown to have high levels of internal consistency as well as a high test-retest reliability.  It has been used to determine employment, academic history and prison status. 

Your score indicates that you have an average EQ.

1. People who typically score in this range are usually able to recognize and understand their feelings and to express them in an appropriate manner. They are fairly comfortable with who they are. In most circumstances they are not afraid to show love, empathy and compassion for other people. In general, they are comfortable with intimacy, and giving of themselves to other people. 

They are pretty good communicators. They are fairly in tune with themselves and those around them. They generally know how to say the right thing at the right moment. They are good friends and partners. They are normally able to show anger in appropriate ways. More often than not, they are able to stand up for themselves when necessary, but also are not afraid to cry if they are hurt. They are able to admit when they are wrong and take steps to correct their mistakes. They are rarely unable to say they are sorry.

They are generally happy, well rounded people. They accept challenges. They can stay motivated and focused in the face of setbacks. They are able to set goals for themselves and often achieve them. They are positive and optimistic about themselves, others around them, and their future.

However, just because people with an average EQ have a pretty good grasp on their emotions they still have plenty of room for emotional growth. They can continue to be introspective. They can continue to communicate with the people around them and continue to work on their goals. They can utilize what they have and continue to identify areas within themselves that need work.

Remember that a personas emotional intelligence never stops growing. Because we are always evolving as people, EQ is something that must be nurtured. If it isn't cultivated, emotional intelligence will disappear

There were many problems presented in the text which had some interesting solutions, here are a few.

1.  When people are unable to manage their emotions it can often lead to stress.  In certain cases stress becomes such a strong emotion that it can produce what is called neurotic cascade.  Neurotic cascade is basically stress but a magnified stress.  People in who fall in to this category tend to blow things out of proportion and over generalize issues.  They may, for example, feel that no one, anywhere cares for or love them when fact of the matter is that they have just broken up with a significant other. 

The solution given for cases such as these is simple.  The person needs to make a conscious effort to be aware of this kind of destructive thinking and try to analyze their thoughts.  By doing this the person can determine whether they are thinking rationally or irrationally.  Getting the opinions of others is also a good way to sort out all the details.

2.  When people are faced with problems they usually deal with them in one of two ways; either they react immediately and vent or they keep everything bottled up inside.  According to the text both ways are destructive.  Holding everything in will cause the person an unnecessary amount out stress and worry with can ultimately lead to health issues.  On the other hand exploding in order to release emotion is equally as destructive because you must still face the aftermath of the explosion.  This to can cause an undo amount of stress for all parties involved. 

The solution given for this is not what you might expect.  One would think, or at least I did, what to discuss the problem with someone -  calmly.  The text suggest that we write it down.  Talking about it they say can sometimes cause the person to get negative feedback and make the situation worse.  Constantly going back over the situation can continue to stir up negative feelings which does not make the situation any easier.  By writing down your feelings you can get it all out then throw it away. 

3.  In today's society we are constantly thinking of the future.  We dream of what we want and how we would feel if our dream became reality.  This kind of thinking is called affective forcasting and can be dangerous.  We tend to think of all the great things that could happen if say we had a six figure income but we fail to think about all of the negative aspects that come along with more money.  In the same respect we tend to avoid all the things that we think are bad but are not as bad as we might think, for example we avoid going to clubs because we think it's only for a certain type of person.  Fact of  the matter is that you might have fun but  you missed the opportunity.

The solution to this is simple.  We must consider all the aspects of these events and assess our real needs not the superficial ones

Emotional Intelligence affects our relationships with everyone we encounter on a daily basis, this we have established.  An aspect of EI that may not be so obvious is that strong EI skills will allow us to be healthy and stress free individuals if we use it effectively and correctly.  Low EI has been shown to be a factor in several mental illnesses such as substance abuse disorders and eating disorders.  These are obviously health issues, but there are more health issue that may not seem so obvious. 

Over expressing your emotions as well as keeping them bottled up inside is first, not and being emotionally intelligent and second, it also affects your health and stress levels.  A person who can be described as cynical, are typically known to have outbursts.  These outbursts an the anger behind them can affect your health.  When a person is hostile and angry, it puts a strain on the heart which leads to symptoms that can potentially cause a heart attack.  This can be worsened when a person who deals with anger relies on smoking, drinking, drugs or food to calm themselves.

If expressing your anger and hostility is unhealthy then it seems only natural to think that the opposite is better, but that is not the case.  Studies have shown that keeping our hostile feelings bottled up increases our blood pressure and in some some studies, although few, have shown that keeping our negative emotion inside so a link to the susceptibility of cancer.  The answer - write it down.  Studies of students, prisoners and unemployed  professionals show that writing down their emotional experiences enabled them to better deal with the health issues cause by the outbursts or the bottling up of negative emotions.

Stress and health go hand in hand.  Those who are better able to regulate their feelings have lower levels of stress and in turn visit the doctor less frequently than those how are unable to regulate their feelings.  A study done with college students showed that those who were better able to regulate their feelings where sick less often.  Stress causes the immune system to lower which causes a person to be more susceptible to colds and illness.  Therefore by effectively using our EI skill to regulate and repair our negative feelings then our health will be less of and issue.

Psychology plays a very important role in emotional intelligence and emotional intelligence plays a very important role in psychology.  A psychology student who learns about emotional intelligence will be able to aid a great many people.  If the psychology student decides that they want to council people, their background in EI studies will allow them to tap into the EI of their patients and clients.  They will be better able to advise them in they ways of understanding, emotional control, perception and empathy.  Learning these techniques will enable the psychology major to council the clients and patients on the most effective ways to deal with each other without triggering conflict and unmanaged emotional outbursts.

Another role that psychology can play in EI is with parenting.  A person with a psychology background who has studied EI can effectively teach parents how to be EI and communicate with their children with out causing an enormous amount of conflict.  Parents are always looking for better ways to deal with their children especially those in adolescence, in order to effectively communicate with them as well as keep disputes down to a minimum.  EI is important in this case because adolescent teens run very high on emotion.  In order to communicate with them and understand them EI is needed.  These are very intense years in a person life and EI will enable both the adolescent and the parental figures to make it as pleasant as possible.  Perhaps the trouble with many psychologists and psychiatrists is that they haven't had enough EI training where as psychology students today who are more in tuned with EI can discover new more effective ways for parents to deal with the adolescent years.

Aside from the counseling and therapy aspect of psychology and EI a psychology student might be interested to know that EI relates to psychology in a more psychiatric approach.  EI can also be examined in people with psychiatric disorders and mental illness.  According to Emotional Intelligence in Everyday Life, "...there is clinical evidence and research that suggest that when a person is emotionally unaware and has difficulty regulating emotion, which corresponds with low EI, some mental disorders can occur or get worse."  EI can be associated with illnesses such as substance abuse disorders, eating disorders, somatoform disorders, anxiety and depressive disorders and borderline personality disorders.

I especially enjoyed  the section on Understanding and Reasoning about Emotion in Marriage.  I am not married but I was still able to apply it to my current relationship.  I also enjoyed Chapter 6 on Emotional Intelligence and Intimate Relationships and chapter 7 on Emotional Intelligence and Empathic Accuracy.  I am now able to see that we, my, "other half" and I, are on different levels when it comes to EI, and we both have different strengths and weaknesses.  Despite the differences we were able to understand that there will be differences but that we must discuss them and become better in regards to our perception, understanding and communication. 

The  most important lesson I learned is that my EI needs some work.  I need to get to know people more "from the inside" rather than "from the outside."  This take a lot of dedication, hard work and time.  Patience, understanding and communication is key.  This book enabled me to take the first big step which is recognizing that EI is more important that I thought and now I am one step closer to becoming emotionally intelligent.

Aside from learning about my intimate relationship I was also able to learn techniques on how to better deal with my family and my co-workers.  I tried to see them from the inside rather than from the outside and to be a bit more empathetic.  When I was consciously being empathetic not only was a I better able to communicate with them but I was also able to control my emotions.  I have to admit that I learned how much I dislike being so accommodating, although the book says that being accommodating is a positive aspect of being EI.
 
 

Although the book was easy reading because it was brief and to the point, it was also weak because of that.  There were some section in the book that I felt could have been a bit more detailed.  After reading some of the sections I was left asking "and..."  I felt that they didn't give me enough information and I wanted to know more.  Chapter 4 on Low Emotional Intelligence and Mental Illness discusses some mental illnesses in which EI plays a role.  The descriptions of those mental illnesses are seemingly short.  Another example would be chapter 7 Emotional Intelligence and Empathic Accuracy which discusses the accurate appraisal and expression of emotion.  The sections that followed also seemed brief and vague.

Overall, I enjoyed this book because not only did I learn about psychology but I learned about myself, my "other half," by family and by co-workers. 

This text was compliled in sections meaning that each chapter is written by a different person.  It is a copulation of the works of many different people.  In the back of the book there are references to the information on the specific chapters if the need to know should arise.  Thre is also an author and subject index.  If a literature review or end notes is what your looking for, sorry, there aren't ary there.

My opinions are just that, my humble opinions.  Here are some reviews by others who have read the same text.  There isn't much to each site but they basically say that the book is a worthwhile read.