Thursday morning, 9/6/01

I woke up at 6:30 a.m. I felt that I needed to eat a healthy breakfast of wheaties with raisin and soy milk to keep me feeling energized.  Afterwards, I took a shower, put on my clothes, organized my backpack, work bag, and home lunch prior to leaving home at 7:45 a.m.  I drove my mom to work on Nimitz Hwy.  While driving to UH lower parking structure at 8:15 a.m., I experienced some traffic back up heading north on University Ave.  I really wanted to cut in the right lane so I thought to myself that hopefully a nearby driver would be kind to let me in.  I was determined to get in the right lane by signaling with the right blinker, turning around, and checking the right side to make sure there's no blind spots.  Luckily, a lady driver whose face looked very intimidating drove slowly and allowed enough space for my car to come in.  I thanked her with a shaka sign and was satisfied.  After coming out of a research meeting at 10:15 a.m., I was on my way to a dentist appointment at 10:30 a.m. in Hemenway Hall.  However, the president of Psi Chi stopped me since he had to give my binder back and fundraiser sign up sheets.  I really wanted to fax the fundraiser sign up sheets  to Marriott Sodexho Inc., but I couldn't because I was running five minutes late for my appointment.  My heart raced as I checked in at the front desk.  The dental hygienist who is also my friend told me I called your phone, left a message, and thought you weren't coming.  I told her I'm sorry I'm late.  I just came from two meetings in Gartley.  I felt bad for not showing up on time and not showing courtesy to call my friend who is the dental hygienist in advance.  My friend said that's alright you're here now.  When I sat in the chair, the burden and stress lifted off of my shoulders.

Thursday afternoon, 9/6/01

I stepped out of Hemenway Hall at 12:30 p.m. I felt rushed again because I had to eat lunch before going to Psych 459 class.  I hurriedly walked to Gartley Lounge, sat down, and consumed my lunch in five minutes.  I went to the bathroom and headed to Business Administration Building.  I worried that I might arrive late to class; however, I came in ten minutes early.  While sitting in class, I rehearsed the thought that I must leave class at 2:20 p.m. because I work at 3:00 p.m.  I wrote Dr. James a short note of apology prior to leaving class thinking just in case he forgot the previous e-mail I sent regarding this matter.  I worried more about what he would think about me leaving class early.  He reassurred me that he remembered.  It was only after that fact I could release my worry with a "Whew!"  I walked and drove fast to work and arrived five minutes early.  Now, I can stop worrying.

Thursday evening, 9/6/01

I acknowledge that I'm disappointed by the power outage which occurred in my residential area at 7:00 p.m. I just finished putting on my clothes from taking a shower.  I noticed the bathroom light flickered twice; followed by no electricity.  I'm not too thrilled about the timing of the power outage.  I really wanted to read for my Psychology classes, pack my workout bag, and eat dinner.  Now, I must put these tasks on hold until HECO restores the electricity.  Power outage occurred when a ton truck hit the bridge and power line.  When I put my clothes on in the bathroom, I heard a long and loud screech ERRRR...KABOOM!  Crazy thoughts such as I'm afraid there's going to be an accident and what the heck was that driver thinking!  I hope HECO comes to fix the lines right away.  For a moment, I was angry at the driver who crashed in to the electric pole.  I said, "Oh great!"  I quickly walked from the bathroom to my room feeling my way through as I put my dirty clothes in the hamper.  My mother hollered from the kitchen, "Can you call Hawaiian Electric on your cell phone?"  I responded, "Wait, I need my glasses."  As soon as I put on my glasses, I grabbed my cell phone, and dashed out in the kitchen.  I called HECO to report the power outage at my mom's urgency.  I felt relieved after making the call.  Thank goodness cell phones and flashlights can operate despite the power outage.  It's been one and a half hour since we are without electricity; however, this will not stop me from writing and using a flashlight to see about a chaotic night.  Power was restored in our neighborhood at 10:15 p.m.

Friday morning, 9/7/01

I woke up at 5:30 a.m. and my eyes felt a little bit tired.  I tried to think positive thoughts such as I'm going to exercise this morning and I know I'll feel ten times better after my workout so feeling tired wouldn't stop me from going to the gym.  As I ran on the treadmill and lifted weights, I thought about the benefits of exercise--having a healthier body and living an active lifestyle.  After working out at the gym, I took a shower and drove to UH.  I did the normal routine of going to my classes, but several factors made this day different.  For instance, I got a chance to fax eight pages to Marriott Sodexho Inc., borrow three videos from the Audiovisual Wong Center, post a message for Psych 459 on the discussion forum, and study my notes for Psych 342.  I felt very productive as I got a lot of tasks accomplished prior to leaving campus.

Friday afternoon, 9/7/01

I felt rushed as I left campus since I had to meet a friend to drop off something before heading to work.  I also felt pressure coming from my friend because she called me on my cell twice to ask if I'm there yet.  First conversation I mentioned I have to use the restroom.  I 'll see you in ten minutes.  During our second conversation, I said, "I'm leaving the parking structure now.  I'll be there in five minutes."  I thought to myself, I wish she didn't call the second time because those extra few seconds of talking on the phone is slowing me down.  After greeting her, I said, "I gotta go work now!"  She stopped me and asked few more questions.  I felt worried that I would arrive to work several minutes late so I sped to work and walked at a fast pace.  Indeed, I arrived to work about two minutes late.  I apologized to client's mom for coming to work late.  I felt irresponsible for not showing up on time since this is the first time it happened.  Client's mom excused me for coming late and said it's alright.  I felt ten times better as I shifted my thinking from negative to positive thoughts.  Although this change helped me to work with my client, I must've burned off a lot of energy because my body felt sluggish and somewhat dehydrated.  I felt very tired since I asked my client's mom if I could eat some grapes to boost my energy level.  I thanked client's mom for giving me grapes which satisfied my appetite.

Friday night, 9/7/01

My mind was in the mood to study at 9:00 p.m.; however, my body felt sluggish and tired.  I wanted to read my Psych 342 book using explicit memory.  I tried but my eyes began to close and I rested my head on the table for ten minutes.  I really felt hungry again even though I ate dinner earlier.  So I didn't understand why my stomach felt empty again and it seemed like my body wanted to intake more food.  The temptation to eat couldn't be resisted when I saw my mother making a tuna sandwich.  I stood up and made a tuna sandwich too.  I was happy after consuming the first sandwich, but my stomach didn't feel contented.  I helped myself to a second tuna sandwich and water.  Finally, my craving for food for tonight is over.  My heart and stomach is contented with what I ate.  I brushed my teeth and slept at 11:00 p.m.

Saturday morning, 9/8/01

I woke up with a headache.  I'm not sure what triggered the headache in the first place.  I tried not to dwell on the throbbing.  I shifted my thoughts to the dream I remember having prior to waking up this morning.  I dreamed I rode on a motorcycle with a guy wearing glasses who I didn't know.  I grabbed my dream interpretation book, sat on the edge of my bed, and looked for the word motorcycle.  My book indicated to dream of riding on a motorcycle means I will have control of my relationships.  I thought what a cool interpretation.  I was pleased to find out for myself that I had a good dream.

Saturday afternoon, 9/8/01

I felt happy because my mind is in the mood to read and write since I have to study for Psych 342.  Several factors I can attribute my happiness and being alert is I ate my lunch, drank water, and took an hour nap at Sinclair Library.  I feel refreshed and ready to work, work, work.  I called one of my best friends since I promised her earlier.  I told her I won't be attending one of our friends' play tonight and I'm doing my homework at Sinclair Library now, but if other plans come up to please call me.  I thought maybe she would feel displeased by my response.  However, she made me feel much more comfortable and not pressured or obligated to attend the play.  My friend said, "That's alright! I understand. I wish you well in your homework."  I told her, "Thank you"  She really lifted my spirit.  Her message made me realize that she understands that I have to finish my homework.  Later, I left campus and vacuumed the car at a gas station.  Vacuuming the car is an effective way to maintain a clean interior.  While I was driving home, I thought about eating dinner because my stomach was craving to eat rice.  I cooked fried rice for dinner and ate at 5:30 p.m. I felt I had a productive day by completing the work I set out to do.

Saturday evening, 9/8/01

I stayed home, read, and took notes for Psych 342 class from 8:00 p.m.-midnight.  I had lots of energy to study tonight.  I felt more productive because I could understand and absorb the material on neuropsychology and cognition.  I was very happy that I stayed home instead of attending my other friends' play.  I was tempted to go out; however, my inner thoughts kept telling me that school should be my number one priority since I can always have fun later.

Sunday morning, 9/9/01

I woke up at 6:30 p.m. feeling energized.  I ate breakfast, brushed my teeth, tied my hair back in a white hankerchief.  I helped my mom carry several car wash supplies to the garage at 7:00 a.m.  I helped my mom wash, dry, and wax the car so we could finish in a shorter amount of time.  I could hear the water spraying, the wringing of chamois skin used for drying, squeaky clean sound of towel used to wipe off the wax, and the shooting spray sound of chrome and tire foam applied to the car.  I sensed the cooperation and sharing of duties between mother and daughter.  It was a productive morning as my mother and I worked together to scrub the grime and dirt followed by adding polish to the car.  Yeah I'm happy the car looks clean and shiny.

Sunday afternoon, 9/9/01

My mother and I ate lunch at a local food establishment.  We ran into an ex-coworker of mine who now works there.  He told us, "When you're ready to order, just let me know."  I thought, "Oh no! Please don't give us a discount on our order because it cost money to keep a business running."  When we told our order to the cashier, my friend gave us two paper cups and whispered in the cashier's ear.  I sensed by the expression on his face that he told the cashier not to charge us for our drinks.  We told them, "Thank you!"  My mother and I felt really bad so we left our entire change in the tip jar.  The only thing that disappointed my mother and I while we were eating was the char siu tasted cold.  I took a small container of char siu and asked the cashier to please heat up the char siu in the microwave for about 30 seconds.  Cashier was nice and I'm glad they took care of it without any fuss.  My friend was standing there, so I thanked him again and mentioned that the food tastes really good!  He extended his arms and I leaned over the counter to give him a hug.  Excellent customer service and seeing an ex-coworker really made my day!

Sunday evening, 9/9/01

I helped my mother cook Asian stir-fry which I enjoyed and found to be very therapeutic.  I ate dinner and concentrated on understanding the concepts of social beliefs and judgments while reading the textbook for Psych 250.  This experience related to Zone 4-positive red other which was to show supportive and constructive behavior.  I felt appreciative for the great food I get to eat.  I thought about how fortunate I am that my mom taught me how to cook at a younger age.

Monday morning, 9/10/01

I woke up at 7:30 a.m. thinking some pessimistic thought.  Oh no, I woke up late!  I better hurry and get moving.  I had intentions of arriving at SSB 635 Lab at 8:00 a.m. to renew my account.  I stopped worrying when I remembered that my mom could drop me off to school at 9:00 a.m. I got ready, ate breakfast, and left home at 8:30 a.m.  I arrived at SSB 635 around 9:00 a.m.  The lab monitor was very helpful in showing me the steps to renewing my account.  I felt good that I got something accomplished.  I went to Psych 250 class feeling peppy and alert.

Monday afternoon, 9/10/01

My body felt very sluggish as if all my energy was zapped from me.  I'm still confused to why my body is reacting this way.  I ate lunch, drank lots of water, took my iron pill, and had a half an hour nap.  Thank goodness my mom picked me up and dropped me off to work around 2:45 p.m.  While riding in the car, my mom offered some decaf mocha frappuccino from Starbucks Coffee, so my energy level went into overdrive.  I told my mom bye, stepped out of the car, and got in the elevator.  I observed a lady telling a little boy to press 7 twice and finally for the third time she said, "Please press 7"  I sensed her tone of voice and request very demanding which irritated me.  She appeared to be healthy and she didn't have her hands full.  She could've told the boy excuse me and press 7 herself.  The little boy didn't do what the lady asked him to do because he was admiring the baby in the stroller.  To finally make this woman zip her lip, I pressed 7 for her and was the farthest away from the buttons.  She told me, "Thank you!"  I appreciated her comment.  I snapped out of feeling irritated by her.

Monday evening, 9/10/01

I came home at 6:00 p.m. feeling burdened by some issues that needs to be taken care of pertaining to Psi Chi Fund-raisers.  I called the other V.P. at home but no one answered the phone, so I left a voice message on her cell phone.  She hasn't returned my call yet, but I'm hoping she will call as soon as she receives my message.  I also feel that I'm carrying a lot of responsibilities as an officer.  I want to appear to others that I have everything under control.  Yet, I know if I don't ask for help or suggestions, I won't feel good knowing that one person cannot complete manpower on their own.  It takes teamwork to make things run smoothly.  I also recognized that stress compounded when a student from the UH school system asked for a pledge to KCC.  I felt obligated to give some money since I graduated from there.  Then, my grandma calls me to do a really big favor for her since she's coming home late!  I felt my energy level decrease.  I'm sleeping at 9:00 p.m. since I must wake up extra early.

Tuesday morning, 9/11/01

I first heard about the two planes crashing into the WTC on the radio at 7:30 a.m. while driving on S. King St. on my way to UH.  Before I heard about the tragedy, I felt somewhat burdened because ruminations about rescheduling cancelled fund-raisers for Psi Chi occupied my thoughts.  When I found out about the masses of people who died and were injured throughout the world, I felt very sad just listening to the chaos reported on the radio and sorry for the lost lives and their loved ones.

Tuesday afternoon, 9/11/01

I went to work trying not to think about today's terrorist attack tragedy since I didn't want my client to notice and imitate my sadness.  For some strange reason, my client told me that he was sad but he wouldn't tell me why.

Tuesday evening, 9/11/01

I couldn't help but worry about my good friend Jeff who resides in N.Y., especially after seeing live coverage of the attack, and Oahu residents donating blood at Blood Bank of Hawaii really moved me to tears.  I called Jeff at 6:00 p.m. Hawaii Time via cell phone which is 12:00 a.m. N.Y. time.  Luckily, he was safe at home watching the news in N.Y.  I mentioned to him that I'm very happy to hear your voice and to know you're still alive.  Since my good friend couldn't call his family from his cell phone because battery was low and phone lines were busy, he asked me to call his mother and sister in Honolulu.  I said, "Sure, I'll be more than happy to call them for you."  Our last words were please take care and be on the lookout for danger.  I was able to cope with my sadness by calling his mom and sister which is one way to bring peace in to their hearts and minds as well as mine.

Wednesday morning, 9/12/01

When I was driving on Prospect St., a black guy attempted to make a left turn without even turning his head left and allowed the car to roll forward.  I blasted the horn to make him aware that I'm coming through.  As soon as he made the left turn, he yelled, "F**K OFF!"  I was so angry at his comment that I wanted to say F**K YOU!  Instead, I clenched my teeth to halt any profanity from spewing out of my mouth.  Then, I gunned the accelerator and sped away.  As I reflected on my thoughts, I'm happy that I kept my anger under control.  In my view, I should've been more patient and not beep the horn.  Yet, I felt he should've looked and gave me the wait signal before allowing the car to move forward.  I'm no longer thinking about swearing or expressing anger because I've calmed down.

Wednesday afternoon, 9/12/01

I felt as if obstacles prevented me from trying to accomplish my agenda.  For example, I tried to fax a list to Marriott Sodexho Inc. twice; however, I received a print out indicating no answer.  So I called them and was informed that their fax machine is down.  I thought bummer!  I told them I'll fax the information again tomorrow morning.  I left campus in a rush to go to work and arrived in Downtown at 2:00 p.m.  I was disappointed when I saw the entrance to Kukui Plaza Garage blocked due to an accident. So I took a detour to Marks Garage.  Sign indicated lot full.  So I tried to think positive, perhaps I could find meter parking on the street; however, no empty spaces were available.  I parked in another garage which costs $9.00 for the day.  I was disappointed about spending a lot of money that afternoon because I usually spend $3.00 to $4.00 per day on parking.  Yet, I knew spending $9.00 was worth the investment since I would not get a ticket for illegally parking my car.

Wednesday evening, 9/12/01

I came home feeling energized after experiencing a productive day at work with my client.  I ate a healthy dinner with my family.  I'm glad my evening turned out to be positive.  

Thursday morning, 9/13/01

Feeling:  Alert in Psych 499 Research

Thinking: What do I have to do the next time our team meets?

Actions: Write due dates on my calendar

Thursday afternoon, 9/13/01

Feeling: Productive time at work

Thinking: Wow! My client is staying on task.

Actions: I praised, "Terrific!"

Thursday evening, 9/13/01

Feeling: energized

Thinking: I should type my Psych 342 1-2 page paper

Actions: Typing fast on the keyboard

Friday morning, 9/14/01

Situation: Driving to UH

Feeling: Rushed to arrive to class on time.  I felt like speeding faster.

Thinking: Hurry cars! You're driving too slow.  I have to be somewhere.

Actions: Clenching teeth...I had a serious look on my face with my mouth closed.

Bridge: Red for Determination  I'm determined to get to class no matter what obstacles I encounter.

Modified Feeling: Chill out!

Modified Thinking: Be patient! I will get to class on time.

Modified Actions: I sang a song while listening to the radio with my windows rolled up.

Friday afternoon, 9/14/01

Situation: checking e-mail

Feeling:  My shoulders are tense

Thinking: I hope Psi Chi members are not disappointed by the changed dates for fund-raisers.

Actions: Open new messages and type on keyboard to send a reply

Bridge: Blue for Resistance  I told myself that I'm going to feel better about myself by switching emotional style.

Modified Feeling: I felt calm when I received e-mail from my friend.

Modified Thinking: Wow! I got an e-mail invitation to my friend's house party

Modified Actions: I smiled big while reading the e-mail.

Friday evening, 9/14/01

Situation: work first, party later!

Feeling: Anxious to finish my paperwork

Thinking: I don't want to arrive at my friend's house party too late.

Actions: Wrote objective notes faster and faster

Bridge: Red for Determination  I'm determined to finish my paperwork tonight before I leave home.

Modified Feeling: Productive

Modified Thinking: If I get it done tonight, I don't have to worry about it on Saturday.

Modified Actions: I slowed down a bit while writing my notes to be sure all information is correct.

Saturday morning, 9/15/01

Feeling: Tired from staying up late.

Thinking: I wish I didn't have to wake up early.

Actions: Stretched my body

Saturday afternoon, 9/15/01

Feeling: Excited

Thinking: Yeah, my eyebrows are finally waxed.

Actions: I talked to my friend while she waxed my eyebrows.

Saturday evening, 9/15/01

Feeling: Pessimistic

Thinking: I don't think I will get an A on upcoming Psych 342 Test.

Actions: I skimmed through my notes.

Bridge: Red for determination  I'm determined to get an A on Exam 1.

Modified Feeling: Be happy about upcoming exam

Modified Thinking: Think positively about it because I can study for it, if I want a good grade.

Modified Actions:  I read, memorized, reflected, and practiced reciting the concepts.

Sunday morning, 9/16/01

Feeling: sluggish

Thinking: I could just sleep in longer.

Actions: I sat up on the edge of my bed.

Sunday afternoon, 9/16/01

Feeling: My stomach feels contented

Thinking: I ate delicious Korean food.

Actions: I told my mom, "The meat jun is tasty!"

Sunday evening, 9/16/01

Feeling: Anxious

Thinking: Just keep studying materials for Psych 342 Exam 1.

Actions: I read, reviewed, and highlighted the key words.

Monday morning, 9/17/01

Feeling: Anxious

Thinking: I wish we didn't have to take the test so early in the semester.

Actions: I kept my arms folded while studying for Exam 1.

Monday afternoon, 9/17/01

Feeling: Happy

Thinking: Yeah! I'm glad Exam 1 is over.

Actions: I asked my classmate if she thought the test was easy.

Monday evening, 9/17/01

Feeling: Somewhat tired

Thinking: I still have to write a report for work.

Actions: I took out paper & pen and started writing.

Tuesday morning, 9/18/01

Feeling: no intense feeling

Thinking: none

Actions: none

Tuesday afternoon, 9/18/01

Feeling: Overwhelmed

Thinking: Oh! Oh! I have a new project to complete for work plus homework.

Actions: Took notes to make sure I don't forget!

Tuesday evening, 9/18/01

Feeling: Burdened with work and school demands

Thinking: Why me?

Actions: I'm pacing in the hallway and telling my mom, "Why does it have to be me?"

Wednesday morning, 9/19/01

Feeling: Confused

Thinking: Should I workout at the gym or drive straight to school.

Actions: I chose the latter activity and drove to school.

Wednesday afternoon, 9/19/01

Feeling: Happy

Thinking: I finished work 45 minutes earlier.  Yeah! I don't need to worry about traffic.

Actions: Walked to the parking lot

Wednesday evening, 9/19/01

Feeling: Calm

Thinking: I should read my Psych 250 Textbook

Actions: I walked into my room and grabbed the textbook.

Dates

Stress

Satisfaction

Effectiveness/Productivity

Coping

Hope

Negativity/Selfishness

Dates

1

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