Annotated Bibliography Report

By: Tara Aoyagi

Fall 2002 - Generation 17

Instructions for this report can be accessed here

The following report focuses on informing you the reader first about the differences between men and women in relationships. What the differences are, what each sex needs in a relationship, and why. The second part of my report discusses pet loss primarily focusing on entertaining the idea of pet afterlife.

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Differences Between Men and Women

There are many differences between men and women. These differences can be physiological, developmental, value, esteem and/or social. The author organizes and lists the differences making them comprehensible and easy to read. Additional to the list, there is a section dedicated to the conflicts that may arise due to the gender differences and how we can “work with these differences” with the hope that the reader can “use the differences as a way to enrich (their) relationship.” I think that the author successfully gets an important message across, that gender differences are inevitable. An individual can either work with these differences and manipulate them in their favor or fight against them adding more strain to the relationship then necessary.

My immediate reaction after I finished reading this piece was how obvious some of the differences are, and how I overlook them in my relationship. Then I thought that if I take these differences for granted, there is a good possibility that other people do the same as well. Maybe that is society’s problem, we tend to make problematic situations more complicated then they really are.

The most interesting part of this piece for me was in last two sections that mention the conflicts that can arise from gender differences and ways we can take advantage of them. In conclusion, I do agree with the author. I think that it is important to educate people on existence of gender differences. The information is useful because it brings the differences to the surface and pushing the reader in the right direction. “To get along you must accept, expect and respect these differences.”

I found this article using the CompuServe search engine. I used this engine because it is my internet provider and it was a good place to start. I didn’t have a hard time finding this information, actually it was quite easy. After you find the right combination of key words, the engine does the rest for you.

www.relationship-institute.com/freearticles_detail.cfm?article_ID=151

Marriage and Relationship Needs Differ from Men and Women:

He needs a Playmate, She needs a Loyal Friend

The title of the piece gives the summary of the article in a nut shell. Men and women have different needs when it comes to happiness in their relationship. The author says that a man requires recreation, while a woman needs loyalty and security. Men find fulfillment in the relationship when their partner has similar recreational interests, but if the relationship lacks recreational similarities the man will often times look elsewhere to fill the gap. Women on the other hand need loyalty which in turn fulfills their need for security. Women want their man to be their best friend as well as lover and similar to men, if this need isn’t met in the relationship the woman may look to someone else for this comfort.

I think the message that the author attempts to get across to us is that there are definite needs in a relationship. While men and women need different things, it all boils down to either working towards meeting these needs or risk loosing your mate to another who can. My initial reaction to the reading was how much sense the piece made. Men always are involved in some kind of recreational activity, whether it be sports, games, or hobbies. Recreation allows a man to relax. Women on the other hand wants to feel safe, to know that her mate only has eyes for her and will take care of her needs no matter what.

What interested me the most about the article is how the author gives no alternative to these needs. You can either choose to fulfill them or eventually lose your loved one. The author didn’t try to sugar coat the situation, the reading was short and straight to the point. In my opinion the piece was very well written, the statements made were very general and easy to relate to. The only problem that I found was that because the statements made were so general, there was a lot of room for interpretation. But, the broadness makes the piece useful to more people, because it doesn’t limit itself.

I found this article using Google. Google I up to this point is my favorite search engine, it is faster then CompuServe and offered more research possibilities. I used the same key words for both engines and found different information with both. The search wasn’t very difficult, making the article easy to find.

http://www.cyberparent.com/gender/needs.htm

Power & Love: power issues in intimate relationships

What this piece says is that men and women are complements. They each posses qualities that allow the other sex to express their gender roles. Society has places gender roles on us from birth, each sex learns that they have roles that they must play in order for their role as a man or woman to be fulfilled. For the man, he needs to take responsibility for the “major decisions, after consulting with his woman, providing the basic necessities, creating a structure” of rules and routines, “protecting her from the business world, and protecting his family from the dangers outside the home.” The woman’s role is to let the man take care of these responsibilities while she supports him allowing him to “express his masculinity.” I interpret the message to be that the man’s role is to take care of the woman while the woman steps aside allowing him to provide for her and the family. The woman has the role of the silent partner.

My initial reaction to this piece was that this author has some really old fashioned values. I was a little appalled because there are no longer these cave man ethics, instead the uprising is towards the equality among sexes. Woman nowadays can do the same for her family as the man can, and if there are two responsible and financially stable parents then the children are better off because they have two very strong role models to admire. It is very interesting to see that there are still people out there that feel that a woman’s place is in the home and not the office.

In my opinion I feel that in no way should the woman be dependant on the man. There are so many problems that can arise, and what will the woman do if she has no skills of her own and her man leaves her? I don’t agree with this reading and I don’t think that it is right or useful. I choose to include in in my research for argumentative reasons. To show that there is good advice on relationships as well as bad advice, and as a reader you must be selective of what you believe and follow.

I found this article using Google. I was still using “gender differences” as my key words and it was very easy to find this piece.

www.powerandlove.com/power/power_n_love/masculine-feminine_model.html

Gender Differences

Gender Differences puts a humorous spin on the whole man and woman thing. It gives specific ways that a man differs from a woman. This is the only piece that I found that gave a set detailed report on exactly what a man and woman have or don’t have in common. At first this piece may seem very strange to read, but like the other readings there is a point to be made. Men and women have quirks about them, but these quirks are what makes the different genders unique.

Differences that the author mentions range from types of socks to sex, from magazines to maturity. I think the author is trying to sarcastically put into perspective how many different ways that men differ from women, at the same time keeping the seriousness contained by mentioning that “we are different -- in our habits, and in the way we react to environmental stimuli and the way we spend our leisure time; and we are especially different when it comes to our attitudes regarding relationships.”

My initial reaction to this reading was that it was really cute, it wasn’t all serious and boring making it a quick and easy read. Its simplistic and comedic ways caught my interest right away and I knew that I was going to use it as part of my research. Unfortunately though, I can’t really say that I agree with the piece in totality. The author goes out on a limb on some issues. I think that it is very useful though because I am sure that I may agree with some aspects of the reading while another person may disagree with me but agree with the author on another point.

I found this piece using the Dogpile search engine. I have found that Dogpile unlike other search engines lists the top 5 hits from a number of engines. Using Dogpile you can find the search engine that contains the best matches for your particular search.

www.interweavers.com/brett/humor/men.women.html

Gender Difference The Mars - Venus Perspective

The idea that is presented here is that “difficulties in relationships between a man and a woman lie in the lack of understanding and acceptance of the differences between the two sexes.” Neither sex is better then the other, they are just different and if one would just take the time to try and understand the basics of the opposite sex relationships would run a lot smother even during the bump times. Men have to understand that women are naturally emotional and like to talk about their feelings and women have to understand that a man wants to be “trusted and admired.” Men talk generally to exchange information.

My initial reaction to this piece was how objective the author was. I think that the author thought that being objective was the best way to get both sexes interested in the material. There is no sides to be taken, only helpful information on how to have a healthy and successful relationship. The interesting part of this piece was that the author also wrote the book “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus,” and I have always wanted to read that book, but I just haven’t had the time.

Like the other readings I am using for my research I have found that a lot of the information is the same. Having so many pieces saying the same thing makes me come to the conclusion that it really must be true. Of course there is room for individuality but the overall picture remains the same and I agree that men and women are very compatible, it just takes time for both sexes to find the right person that fit’s the best.

I found this reading while searching on Dogpile. I used the key words Gender relationship differences. I found a lot of useful information with this engine key word combination.

http://psychology.about.com/library/weekly/aa080102a.htm

The Emotions of Pet Loss

The loss of a pet can be a very emotional time for a person. There are many stages an individual goes through after the pet’s passing. The author breaks down the different emotions in stages and states that everyone basically follows the same pattern. First comes the anger, then guilt, followed by denial, and finally depression. It has been discussed that the experience of losing a pet can be very similar to the death of a family member. So understanding the pattern of feelings and ways to cope is a healthy start for emotional recovery.

Initially, I thought that it was important for me to find information on what a human being goes through following a pet’s death. I thought that I needed to first express this situation because it is important to understand exactly what a person goes through during this trying time. I am sure that not everyone has experienced a pet loss, so my goal was to get everyone on the same page before I got into discussing pet afterlife. The idea of life after death gives those still living a peace of mind because now there is the possibility of reuniting with your lost loved one.

I truly believe that a pattern of emotions exist and the reason for my belief is because I personally witnessed my mom go through them. Although the amount of time in each stage may vary, the general idea in my eyes is right. And posting these stages publicly I’m sure will help other’s dealing with the pet loss situation.

I found this information using Google, this was the only information I found useful on Google. My main focus is on pet afterlife, but unfortunately that topic is very hard to research. My search gave me a lot of information similar to this piece.

www.pet-loss.net/emotions.html

A Spiritual Perspective on Pet Death

The Bible says, “God exists not only in man but in everything that lives.” The author of “A Spiritual Perspective on Pet Death,” leads us in his work to believe that animals have souls and because of their souls they are allowed like their master’s access after death to Heaven and the Pearly Gates. “The founder of the Protestant Church, Martin Luther believed they went to Heaven.” And “some people believe that what gives animals a place in Heaven is their relationship to humans.” The intent of this reading I think is to shed light on the subject of death and to give hope to those stuck in grief stage.

My initial reaction to this piece was one of total agreement. I want to believe that there is a place for animal souls to go after they leave their physical body and that we will be reunited with them if not in this life, in Heaven. It was interesting to read though that the founder of the Protestant Church believes in animals having souls. It was interesting to read that there is testimony backing up this idea.

In my opinion the afterlife does exist and I believe that if your pet’s soul wants to return to you, it will but if not then you will reunite with them in Heaven when it is your turn to leave your physical body. I agree with the piece, I just didn’t enjoy reading the part about animal ghost sightings. I t is comforting to read that I am not alone in this belief.

I found this information using Dogpile. Dogpile allowed me to find the right combination of key word and search engine. After I found the right combination the search wasn’t that hard. Everything fell into place.

www.pets2rest.co.uk/spiritus.htm

Animal Soul

This is an argumentative piece debating on whether or not animals have souls. Robert M. Young the author, does a good job of offering us the reader different opinions leaving the final opinion up to us. Young starts his piece off talking about Descartes and his belief that animals are simply machines. Following Descartes opinion came a reaction to his beliefs accompanied by alternate beliefs; Sensationalism and the Man-Machine, Evolution, Comparative Psychology, and Behaviorism, and Mechanism and Teleological Explanation. What I derived from this style of report is that the author wants to give the reader the freedom to choose if animals have souls or not.

The main focus of my research is to find information on if animals experience an afterlife. I thought that a good place to start was to see if first of all animals have souls or not. The title of this reading is what caught my eye. It basically told me that the piece to follow dealt with the issue I was trying to research. Initially after I read the piece, I thought it was informative, but confusing. There are now multiple possibilities running through my mind on this subject and I am more confused about animal afterlife then when I started.

I have my own idea of what pet afterlife is, and I guess I am having a hard time researching on this topic because I am looking for specific information that will support what I believe. I do admit that there are some parts in this reading that I do believe, but not all. Overall it was a useful piece. It showed me that this subject is just as complicated as human death and there are too many opposing beliefs for a universal idea to develop.

I was lucky enough to find this piece be chance, I was just trying different search engines and this is what popped up when I was using Dogpile. Until I found Dogpile, I was having a very hard time researching on this topic. I was coming up with the same things and they weren’t exactly what I was looking for.

www.human-nature.com/myyoung/papers/paper59h.html

Do Pets Go to Heaven?

Moira Anderson Allen has a few published readings on the internet. In this particular piece she tries to clarify the question do pets go to heaven? It is obvious when reading her piece that Moira believes in pets going to heaven. She offers valid arguments on the subject starting out with why the Bible doesn’t mention animal salvation. Followed by “what does heaven look like?” “Lessons in love, Do pets care,” and making your decision if pets go to heaven, based on the reading.

Valid arguments are what made me chose to use this piece as part of my research. I really liked how the author challenged herself because she used information in her piece that could persuade the readers against her cause. Initially I thought that the piece was great because it was a perfect fit for my research. Reading this article made me feel better because it has proven to me that there are solid facts that can support the idea of animals in heaven. I personally believe that there are animals in heaven, I believe that this piece is useful not only to support my opinion, but it can be a useful piece to share with someone who is grieving a lost pet.

I found this article with pure luck I was just playing with different engines and key words. When I used Pets in Heaven as my key words on Dogpile this was the first search that came up.

www.pet-loss.net/heaven.html

Pets in Heaven

“Pets in Heaven” uses the ideas of the Catechism of the Catholic Church to explain their opinion on animal afterlife. The Catechism believe that “all living things have a soul.” The “soul is defined as what makes an organic body live.” The idea here is that although animals are living, they aren’t immortal souls and they do not possess the ability to decide between good or evil. Because animals lack the ability for decision, the Catholic Church believes that their souls aren’t in heaven.

I thought that I would use this piece to give an alternative perspective to my animal afterlife theory. It was interesting how in this reading the author tried to manipulate words directly quoted from the Bible and change their meaning. There are contradiction everywhere and I chose this article to show that. My final opinion on this piece was that it was poorly written. I think a little more research should have been done so stronger arguments could have been made against animal afterlife. The reading to me was neither useful or not, it was just entertaining.

I found this piece searching on the internet with Lycos.com. I was a hard reading to find. It was hiding among all the book advertisements.

www.ewtn.com/expert/expert/answers/pets_in_heaven.htm

Rainbow Bridge

I thought that it would be nice to change the pace and offer a lighter side to death. Rainbow Bridge is a lovely poem about life after death from an animals point of view. It describes this place called Rainbow bridge where the animals are free and live in complete happiness. It is like a heaven for animals a place to finally call home.

What caught my eye about this poem was how it made me feel when I read it. Reading a poem like this one gives you a sense of relief, some guilt is lifted when you read that there is really a heavenly place for animals where they are forever happy.

Rainbow Bridge is a place that is harmless to believe in. I think that if you are grieving the loss of a pet it is okay to believe in a place like Rainbow Bridge. Just the thought gives you piece of mind and can help you though the difficult process. Rainbow bridge is useful, right and I agree with its message in totality.

I found Rainbow bridge in every search I did, so I thought that fate must be telling me to include it in my research so I did.

www.petloss.com/poems/maingrp/rainbowb.htm

Everyone has a relationship experience one time in their life. I feel that if we were all fortunate enough to start out with the right tools and understand what the other person needs and wants the relationship would run a lot smoother. The relationship section of my report heads you the reader in the right direction for building the right tools for a healthy relationship. The second part of my report deals with the loss of a pet and opens the possibility to an animals afterlife, hopefully giving some peace of mind to those who has experienced pet loss. From here you can build on these ideas or create new ones, but I guarantee once in your lifetime this information will prove useful.