A Review of
Deborah
Tannen, Ph.D.
Talking from 9 to 5
Women
and Men in the Workplace:
Language,
Sex and Power
Avon Books, 1994
by Samantha Fung,
University of Hawaii
May 1st, 2003
(1)
The Book’s
Overall Content
The Book’s
Overall Content
In Talking
From 9 to 5, Dr. Deborah Tannen explains and explores the different
communication styles of women and men in the workplace. To better understand the content, I have
identified six major topics to represent the overall content of the book: a)
Conversational Styles, b) Asymmetry in Conversational Styles, c) Gender Roles
Come into Play, d) “WOMEN”: Marked Form of “MEN”, e) Women, Power and Status, and f) Generalizing vs.
Stereotyping.
I find the
topics very intriguing and inspiring because while reading the book, many times
I found myself exclaiming “Aha! No wonder!”
The topics are related and progress from the first to the last. They also overlap with each other to
different extents.
Conservational Styles (Ch.2, p.43-51,
54-57, 66-70; Ch.3, p. 78-79; Ch.9 300-302)
In
the beginning, the book deals with certain conversational rituals that people
often use in the workplace.
Conversational rituals such as saying “I’m sorry”, “thank you” or giving
praises and compliments are being used as smoothers to grease the wheels of a
working environment.
Besides
using conversational rituals, talking in an indirect way also marks the style
of a person’s way of communicating with others. Some people give bald commands at work, but some use indirect
requests that are so indirect that they do not sound like requests at all. Rather, they are just statements of need or
descriptions of a situation.
Another
conversational style that distinguishes a group of people from others is the
use of “rapport talk”, as opposed to “report talk”. Rapport talk is used when the speaker tries to maintain an equal
status with those who are listening and it provides ground for everyone to
speak up, whereas in report talk, the speaker tries to take and keep center
stage.
Asymmetry in Conversational Styles (Ch.
2, p.45-47; Ch.3, p.79; Ch.9, p.301)
A conversation
usually runs smoothly when both parties are using and interpreting the
conversational rituals in the same or similar way. However, if one party construes the ritual in a way that is
different from the other, problem arises.
The differing rituals are even more problematic when the parties think
they are both speaking the same language.
Other than
conversational rituals, indirectness also triggers confusion and
misunderstanding when speakers have different habits with regard to using it.
As in the cases of different uses of
conversational rituals and indirectness, rapport-talkers often find themselves
lacking the chance or feeling uncomfortable to speak up in a group of
report-talkers, and hence an unpleasant feeling builds within them.
Gender Differences Come into Play (Ch.1,
p.23; Ch.9, p.301)
So
how does the asymmetry in conversational rituals relate with “women and men in
the workplace”? It is interesting to note that although individual differences
account for some asymmetry in conversational rituals, most part of the
asymmetry comes from the gender differences of women and men.
The
conversational styles that men often use involve using opposition such as
banter, teasing, and playful insults, and trying to avoid the one-down position
in their interactions. It is also
common for men to form a certain hierarchy among them. Since they were boys, high-status boys
emerge and hold center-stage while other lower-status boys take the role as a
follower. Many men, therefore, are more
used to rapport-talks because of their experiences of holding center-stage as
boys better prepare them to speak up at meetings.
As for
women, it is more common for them to maintain an appearance of equality and
take into account the effect of the exchange on the other person. In order to do that, women often put
themselves in a one-down position so that they do not have to flex their
muscles to get the job done. Even when
they were girls, they tried not to stand out from the group and establish
themselves as someone superior to the rest of the group. To them, standing out means being bossy, and
most women put themselves down to avoid that title.
“WOMAN”: Marked Form of “MAN” (Ch.4,
p.108-109, 111-112)
The
word “woman”, according to the Bible (Gen 2:23), is defined as “taken out of
man”. It seems that since the world was
created, “woman” is the marked form of “man”.
When something is “marked”, it means that it has something extra added
to it, and it is not something of its original form.
By looking
at most of the English words, one can say that the unmarked forms always convey
“male”. Words such as “chairman” and
“chairlady”, “actor” and “actress”, “policeman” and “policewoman” exemplify the
case that being male is unmarked.
Not only
daily words we use but also the surnames of all married women are marked. If a woman chooses to use her husband’s
name, she announces to the world that she is married and will be identified
more by her husband’s identity.
However, if she chooses not to use her husband’s name but to keep her
own, she is said to have “kept her own name”, a case which is also marked. This, however, never occurs to a man because
using his own name is unmarked.
Women, Power and Status (Ch.6, p.160-162;
Ch.5, p.133-136)
One
of the authority figures assumed by many women is the role of a mother. However, some use it as a derogatory against
women when women are the ones who watch out for those who report to them. It seems that when people think of a female
authority figure, they think of their own mother.
However,
in the real world, women, who are in positions of authority, do not act like an
authority figure. It is because they
think that an authority figure is thought to be authoritarian, and an
authoritarian does not make a good manager when it comes to management.
Women are
also found to downplay their authority while exercising it. They hold the notion that “we’re all equals”
and try not to establish a hierarchical relationship with their subordinates. Unfortunately, although they are very
considerate in creating a friendlier working environment for their co-workers,
it is seen by some that these women are incompetent rather than considerate.
Even
women who are not in a position of power tend to remain as equals with their
fellow co-workers. They are, in
general, more reluctant than men to speak up and stand out as an
individual. As a result, they are also
seen by their superiors as incompetent and hardly get a chance to be
promoted. These women are said to be
prevented from rising to the top by an invisible barrier, which many refer to
as the “glass ceiling”. Many companies
thus lose a number of competent female workers who should have been promoted
but are held back by the glass ceiling.
Generalizing vs. Stereotyping (Ch.1,
p.27; Ch.4, p.117; Afterword, p.311-313)
The
terms generalizing and stereotyping both come into use when one talks about
women and men in the workplace. To
generalize means to move beyond a single instance and see its relationship with
other instances. It is helpful to
generalize certain conversational styles at work because that will save time
and effort in discerning every single pattern.
Yet, one
should also bear in mind that there will be exceptions to the patterns observed
and that the mode of generalization should not be taken too far or to an
extreme, or else stereotyping occurs.
Stereotyping is similar to generalizing, but different in its sense of
rigidity. A stereotype is an image or
idea of a particular type of person or thing that has become fixed through
being widely held. Not only
stereotyping does not enhance communication at work, it actually aggravates any
confusion or misunderstanding aroused.
A common
stereotype among women and men in their styles is that men are more focused on
information and that women are more sensitive.
Many times, this does not hold true when it comes to asking for
directions when lost.
The Book’s
Importance
Dr.
Tannen’s Talking From 9 to 5 is important in discerning the different
ways in which men, women, and individuals in general communicate in the
workplace. This helps promote a more
positive and productive professional relationship among women and men.
The
book’s topics are relevant to public concern today where sexism still exists
and some women’s potentials are still limited by the glass ceiling. By reading this book, superiors to female
employees will understand that in many cases, it is a woman’s consideration
that seems to render her incompetent but not her real ability.
The topics
are also relevant to psychology as a field because it helps raise questions
such as how people’s upbringing affects their later way of communication
styles, or how people relate a female authority figure to their own
mother. I think more in-depth
researches are needed to fully answer those questions to help promote a better
working environment.
The book
does not attempt to answer all the questions about miscommunications one can
find at the workplace, but helps readers to be more flexible in thinking to
find out why such miscommunications can take place.
As a
psychology major, I think this book fits very well in this course. It is true that this book does not consist well-cited
research papers, nevertheless, it provides ground for discussion and stimulates
students to think upon what researches could have been done to further explain
a miscommunication problem.
The Book’s
Structure
This book does not have exercises or end-of-chapter quizzes. Not does it have any tables or diagrams.
The Chapter titles give a pretty good preview of what each chapter is about, yet within each chapter, it is not easy to relate the sub-titles with the chapter title. The sub-titles seems a little scattered within the chapter. I think more transitions between each sub-title are needed to make the chapters more comprehensive.
The “Afterword”, I think, can be as set up a chapter on its own. Although it does summarize some ideas brought forward by the preceding chapters, it also consists of ideas that were not discussed previously in the chapters, such as generalizing and stereotyping.
The
index is easy to use and is useful when I need to look up specific terms to
help me refresh the memory of a certain chapter.
The print
is neither too small nor too big. It is
just of the right size.
Critique of the
Book
As mentioned earlier, I found this book very inspiring because it helps me understand why certain people use certain conversational rituals. I am also more aware of the differences in conversation styles of the people around me and I’m propelled further to find out why, without passing judgment, some people adopt a certain communication style.
I think it is wise of Dr. Tannen to constantly remind readers to be flexible when looking for solutions to deal with all different types of communication styles. One quote that I found very interesting is on p. 309 & 310:
“…the
most important key is understanding the parameters of conversational style,
which provides the tools to become more flexible not only in your way of
speaking but, equally important, in interpretinghow others mean what they say,
and in evaluating others’ abilities.”
Needless to say, it would be impossible to list all the solutions in the book, when at the same time, it would be too easy if people can just follow a guide and do according to what the book says.
Another quote that I like very much is on p.43 & 44:
“…Americans
are hypocritical because they ask you you are but aren’t interested in the
answer. And Americans in Burma are
puzzled when Burmese ask, “Have you eaten yet?”—and show no sign of inviting
them to lunch. In the Philippines,
people ask each other, “Where are you going?”—which may seem rather intrusive
to Americans, who don’t realize that the only reply expected is, “Over there.””
I like the fact that cultural differences are included in this book. Though, again, it does not provide all possible solutions of how one can deal with a foreigner, it reminds readers to bear in mind that cultural differences exist and that people should respect them.
To improve the book, I would suggest Dr. Tannen to include a summary at the end of each chapter so that it can wrap up what the chapter has introduced or explored. By doing this, the reader can get a firmer grasp of the chapter by reading the summary before moving on to the next chapter. It will help the reader to better remember and hence connect ideas throughout the book.
Other reviews that I have found of this book can be retrieved at the following websites:
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0380717832/104-2149448-9791902?vi=glance
http://empathy.colstate.edu/Books/talking_from_9_to_5.htm
Additional
Observations
In Chapter 4, the book talks about women being marked in the work place, which I agree, however, if we take the biological point of view, it is the men who are marked. Every person is born a woman with the chromosome pair XX unless something extra, in this case it is the chromosome Y, is added to make the chromosome pair an XY to change that person to a man. Yet, in real life, it is the women who are marked, not men.
Another thing that comes to my mind while writing up this report is that, in my usual writing, I usually write “men and women”, with the word “men” preceding the word “women”, but in this report I always use “women and men”. I guess I was influenced by the title of this book and also the author.
During class, Dr. James has mentioned a couple of times that some other articles written by Dr. Tannen can be found from the web. I decided to look them up and found Dr. Tannen’s home page with a link to many of her General Audience Publications which can be retrieved at http://www.georgetown.edu/faculty/tannend/popular.htm.