Blog: Workplace Conversational Experiences

April 23, 2003

This past Monday, my partner (another student from the Sociology of Aging class) and I were having a Focus Group Discussion with some elderly, who ranged from 65 years old to 84, at the Moiliili Community Center to find out what were their needs, barriers to accessing available services, and other issues they deemed important. Towards the end of the session, we were listening to an elderly woman talk about her family on the mainland wanting to make mochi. Unfortunately, they were not making any progress because they were pounding raw rice instead of cooked rice. Anyway, the program director of the senior center said that it was difficult finding men to pound mochi as a cultural activity for the Japanese school children to see.

I was able to tape the session and wanted to share this following piece between a woman in her seventies (E) and the program director who is not yet retired (P):
P: "I tried to get people to try and pound mochi the last time but that's why I said that's it because I ended up calling Ethnic Studies people because the older guys say 'I'm getting too old for this, oh, my back.' I can't find younger..."
E: "There's a machine...a mochi machine"
P: "It doesn't taste the same."
E: "Oh, but you gotta be up with what's available today."
P: "...but that's...yeah..."
E: "so that's the interesting thing for you know..."
P: "But we cannot wait one hour. The machine takes one hour from cooking to pounding to be able to cut. If you're gonna be doing this, you're gonna have to be grinding batches one by one."
E: "hmm..."

April 18, 2003

Last month, female co-worker #2 and I were in charge of getting guest speakers. After I gave her the list of people/agencies I contacted, I asked her if she had any. She replied, "Oh, did you want me to start e-mailing businesses?"( I was thinking in my head - why would you e-mail them, wouldn't it be more efficient to call places and ask around?) Well, I told her that she could schedule her guest speakers on days that weren't occupied by my guest speakers, thinking that it would motivate her to start doing something. Unfortunately, even though she claimed 3 hours calling guest speakers, nothing materialized. In the beginning, she claimed to know so many people she could bring in, but what? It didn't even take me more than an hour to call various places and ask for available people. Within that hour alone, I had four people lined up.

At a meeting this past Wednesday, when female co-worker #1 asked female co-worker #2 about her progress, she said that she asked one of the bosses in our office for help in finding a guest speaker. The boss suggested an athlete that she knew. Anyway, female co-worker #2 told us that she hasn't checked her e-mail for the past three days and so does not know if our boss has sent word. (I was thinking - okay, since you go to the office every now and then, why don't you just ask her in person or call her?)

March 6, 2003

Just a recap - our social event went well this past Sunday.

We (female co-worker #1, solo male co-worker, and I) had a meeting today to discuss next month's theme and activities. Female co-worker #2 did not attend - again. I had male co-worker call her half an hour before our scheduled meeting. She apologized for not being able to make it because she thought our meeting was tomorrow, which I thought was a bogus excuse because we were all just talking about it yesterday. In fact, I already knew that she would be a no-show because she kept making excuses of how she'll see if she can come because her friend might have to use the car to pick up someone and she's not sure if it is her turn to drive tomorrow. Anyhow, our meeting was productive; we came up with activities/ideas that should cover the next 2 months. By the way, our theme is Goal Setting and Career Exploration.

If any of you out there want to be a guest speaker to talk about your jobs, e-mail me.

February 27, 2003

We (female co-worker #1, solo male co-worker, and I) met to finalize our agenda for this coming Sunday's Spring Social. Female co-worker #2 could not meet with us because she said that she would not be on campus. She said, "Why don't you guys just meet and give me a call." The three of us were probably thinking the same thought - why can't she put in effort? I mean, even when we meet over the breaks, we put in effort to come to campus so that we can all meet at the office. Nonetheless, we had a very productive meeting. In fact, while thinking of games to play with the kids on Sunday, we tried them out and ended up laughing a lot. Well, I guess she just missed another 'team-building' kind of meeting.

February 24, 2003

There has been a substitute teacher for this ESLL Math class for a few days now. As she was explaining fractions and the concept of multiplication, my co-worker (a grad student in Education) was complaining about the teacher's style. I was standing in the back of the classroom, overlooking the students, reprimanding those who were talking or throwing things around, and she came to where I was standing. While she was whispering in my ear about what the teacher should do instead, the substitute at the front of the classroom told her, "Do you want to do it instead?" It wasn't said with a very friendly tone so I interpreted it as an irritated response to the grad student. Well, the grad student went up and tried her method.

I say both of their methods are good. Students learn in different ways and it helps them see problems done differently to get the same answer. However, students tend to misbehave when there is a substitute teacher.

After directly telling female co-worker #2 to choose 4 people to contact, I find out today that she only chose 2. I used to be quite indirect in requesting tasks done, but yesterday I tried the direct approach and did not get the results I wanted. This leaves me wondering what I should do to get through to her. I'm still trying to figure her out - Could she have possibly not understood what I told her to do? Maybe she forgot? Maybe she doesn't want to listen to me?

At our debriefing today, female co-worker #1 said, "We need to think of an agenda for the party." Female co-worker #2 replies, "--- (our male co-worker) knows a lot of icebreakers. I think to myself, "Good. She's making suggestions, but she's still volunteering someone else. (Our male co-worker had to leave early and so could not comment on her suggestion.) Anyway, we know that we will be eating and having activities. I'm not all that worried about the agenda, especially since our event is only 2 hours, so I focus on the more urgent task of contacting mentors and students' parents. I ask female co-worker #1, "Do you need help contacting mentors? (By the way, we only have 11 reliable ones.) She says sure and brings out the list. I immediately suggest that we divide the list. Since she had a class in 30 minutes, I told female co-worker #2 to pick four to contact. (Remember, this is the co-worker that needs to be told directly what to do or else she won't do anything.) I let her choose first because I will be meeting with female co-worker #1 tomorrow to do a mailout of flyers. Because female co-worker #2 can't meet with us, she tells me that she will leave the list in my box.

Telling her what to do wasn't so bad; maybe female co-worker #1 and I should be more direct more often so that we can get more work done.

I was at a meeting this past Monday and it had just occurred to me that one of my female co-workers is adept in picking up on indirect requests while another female co-worker seems not to notice them or just does not want to volunteer to do a task.

We are in the midst of planning a student-parent-mentor gathering early in March and also want to have guest speakers for a few sessions, but we haven't quite done anything yet, so I said, "Flyers have to be sent out soon. We need guest speakers for career exploration, too." Female co-worker #1 says, "Oh yeah, who wants to do them?" Our solo male co-coordinator volunteers. Anyway, since I have already sent out letters to businesses asking for donations and female co-worker #1 was already in charge of contacting the mentors, I assumed that female co-worker #2 would volunteer to handle guest speakers. It was awkward because she thought of potential guest speakers such as a UH athlete, her cousin who is a singer, etc., but she did not say that she would ask them. Finally, after all this alluding, female co-worker #1 asks, "Okay, why don't you ask them." And I add, "Yeah, since you have a lot of connections. Those people would be good for the kids." Female co-worker #2 finally says, "Umm, I'll see." I started to realize that female co-worker #2 wouldn't do anything until she gets a direct request to do so.


Annotated Bibliography Forms Research Report Book Review Oral Presentation Notes

Back to my Home Page		April 23, 2003 This past Monday, my partner (another student from the Sociology of Aging class) and I were having a Focus Group Discussion with some elderly, who ranged from 65 years old to 84, at the Moiliili Community Center to find out what were their needs, barriers to accessing available services, and other issues they deemed important. Towards the end of the session, we were listening to an elderly woman talk about her family on the mainland wanting to make mochi. Unfortunately, they were not making any progress because they were pounding raw rice instead of cooked rice. Anyway, the program director of the senior center said that it was difficult finding men to pound mochi as a cultural activity for the Japanese school children to see. I was able to tape the session and wanted to share this following piece between a woman in her seventies (E) and the program director who is not yet retired (P): P: "I tried to get people to try and pound mochi the last time but that's why I said that's it because I ended up calling Ethnic Studies people because the older guys say 'I'm getting too old for this, oh, my back.' I can't find younger..." E: "There's a machine...a mochi machine" P: "It doesn't taste the same." E: "Oh, but you gotta be up with what's available today." P: "...but that's...yeah..." E: "so that's the interesting thing for you know..." P: "But we cannot wait one hour. The machine takes one hour from cooking to pounding to be able to cut. If you're gonna be doing this, you're gonna have to be grinding batches one by one." E: "hmm..." April 18, 2003 Last month, female co-worker #2 and I were in charge of getting guest speakers. After I gave her the list of people/agencies I contacted, I asked her if she had any. She replied, "Oh, did you want me to start e-mailing businesses?"( I was thinking in my head - why would you e-mail them, wouldn't it be more efficient to call places and ask around?) Well, I told her that she could schedule her guest speakers on days that weren't occupied by my guest speakers, thinking that it would motivate her to start doing something. Unfortunately, even though she claimed 3 hours calling guest speakers, nothing materialized. In the beginning, she claimed to know so many people she could bring in, but what? It didn't even take me more than an hour to call various places and ask for available people. Within that hour alone, I had four people lined up. At a meeting this past Wednesday, when female co-worker #1 asked female co-worker #2 about her progress, she said that she asked one of the bosses in our office for help in finding a guest speaker. The boss suggested an athlete that she knew. Anyway, female co-worker #2 told us that she hasn't checked her e-mail for the past three days and so does not know if our boss has sent word. (I was thinking - okay, since you go to the office every now and then, why don't you just ask her in person or call her?) March 6, 2003 Just a recap - our social event went well this past Sunday. We (female co-worker #1, solo male co-worker, and I) had a meeting today to discuss next month's theme and activities. Female co-worker #2 did not attend - again. I had male co-worker call her half an hour before our scheduled meeting. She apologized for not being able to make it because she thought our meeting was tomorrow, which I thought was a bogus excuse because we were all just talking about it yesterday. In fact, I already knew that she would be a no-show because she kept making excuses of how she'll see if she can come because her friend might have to use the car to pick up someone and she's not sure if it is her turn to drive tomorrow. Anyhow, our meeting was productive; we came up with activities/ideas that should cover the next 2 months. By the way, our theme is Goal Setting and Career Exploration. If any of you out there want to be a guest speaker to talk about your jobs, e-mail me. *February 27, 2003* We (female co-worker #1, solo male co-worker, and I) met to finalize our agenda for this coming Sunday's Spring Social. Female co-worker #2 could not meet with us because she said that she would not be on campus. She said, "Why don't you guys just meet and give me a call." The three of us were probably thinking the same thought - why can't she put in effort? I mean, even when we meet over the breaks, we put in effort to come to campus so that we can all meet at the office. Nonetheless, we had a very productive meeting. In fact, while thinking of games to play with the kids on Sunday, we tried them out and ended up laughing a lot. Well, I guess she just missed another 'team-building' kind of meeting. *February 24, 2003* There has been a substitute teacher for this ESLL Math class for a few days now. As she was explaining fractions and the concept of multiplication, my co-worker (a grad student in Education) was complaining about the teacher's style. I was standing in the back of the classroom, overlooking the students, reprimanding those who were talking or throwing things around, and she came to where I was standing. While she was whispering in my ear about what the teacher should do instead, the substitute at the front of the classroom told her, "Do you want to do it instead?" It wasn't said with a very friendly tone so I interpreted it as an irritated response to the grad student. Well, the grad student went up and tried her method. I say both of their methods are good. Students learn in different ways and it helps them see problems done differently to get the same answer. However, students tend to misbehave when there is a substitute teacher. *February 20, 2003* After directly telling female co-worker #2 to choose 4 people to contact, I find out today that she only chose 2. I used to be quite indirect in requesting tasks done, but yesterday I tried the direct approach and did not get the results I wanted. This leaves me wondering what I should do to get through to her. I'm still trying to figure her out - Could she have possibly not understood what I told her to do? Maybe she forgot? Maybe she doesn't want to listen to me? *February 19, 2003* At our debriefing today, female co-worker #1 said, "We need to think of an agenda for the party." Female co-worker #2 replies, "--- (our male co-worker) knows a lot of icebreakers. I think to myself, "Good. She's making suggestions, but she's still volunteering someone else. (Our male co-worker had to leave early and so could not comment on her suggestion.) Anyway, we know that we will be eating and having activities. I'm not all that worried about the agenda, especially since our event is only 2 hours, so I focus on the more urgent task of contacting mentors and students' parents. I ask female co-worker #1, "Do you need help contacting mentors? (By the way, we only have 11 reliable ones.) She says sure and brings out the list. I immediately suggest that we divide the list. Since she had a class in 30 minutes, I told female co-worker #2 to pick four to contact. (Remember, this is the co-worker that needs to be told directly what to do or else she won't do anything.) I let her choose first because I will be meeting with female co-worker #1 tomorrow to do a mailout of flyers. Because female co-worker #2 can't meet with us, she tells me that she will leave the list in my box. Telling her what to do wasn't so bad; maybe female co-worker #1 and I should be more direct more often so that we can get more work done. *February 16, 2003* I was at a meeting this past Monday and it had just occurred to me that one of my female co-workers is adept in picking up on indirect requests while another female co-worker seems not to notice them or just does not want to volunteer to do a task. We are in the midst of planning a student-parent-mentor gathering early in March and also want to have guest speakers for a few sessions, but we haven't quite done anything yet, so I said, "Flyers have to be sent out soon. We need guest speakers for career exploration, too." Female co-worker #1 says, "Oh yeah, who wants to do them?" Our solo male co-coordinator volunteers. Anyway, since I have already sent out letters to businesses asking for donations and female co-worker #1 was already in charge of contacting the mentors, I assumed that female co-worker #2 would volunteer to handle guest speakers. It was awkward because she thought of potential guest speakers such as a UH athlete, her cousin who is a singer, etc., but she did not say that she would ask them. Finally, after all this alluding, female co-worker #1 asks, "Okay, why don't you ask them." And I add, "Yeah, since you have a lot of connections. Those people would be good for the kids." Female co-worker #2 finally says, "Umm, I'll see." I started to realize that female co-worker #2 wouldn't do anything until she gets a direct request to do so.

Dr. Leon James, Instructor

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© Michelle Sagucio Last updated: May 7, 2003