Report 5
Traffic Vignettes
5 CARtoon Vignettes
- Doug is driving down the freeway and is abruptly startled by honking
horns and flashing lights behind him. He pulls over into the right lane and as the impatient driver zooms by and flips him the bird he sees a bumper sticker that says "Born to Speed". A smile breaks on his face and he stomps on the gas in pursuit. The
impatient driver didn't notice that Doug's bumper sticker read "Born to Tailgate".
- Paul is rushing to an important interview for a new job. On route there, he finds himself stuck behind a car traveling 45 miles per hour in the left lane. He decides to ride the guys bumper until finally the car pulls into the right lane. Instead
of speeding by, Paul pulls up next to the guy, flips him the bird and
shouts several vulgarities that cross his mind. When he gets to the interview he is told to wait about fifteen minutes because the boss isn't in yet. Five minutes later the secretary sends Paul in to see Mr. Hawthorn. When Paul opens the door his heart
sinks as he realizes that the man he was rushing to meet was the man he was tailgating.
- Dave and his new neighbor Rob, have decided to meet a a basketball
game on Friday. When Friday roles around, Rob comes home early from work
so he can get ready for the game. Dave decides to stop at the pub near
his house on the way home. There he knocks back four or five double
martinis to get warmed up for the game. He then rushes home to change and just as he pulls into his driveway he sees Rob pulling out of his and shouts, "I'll meet you there buddy". Dave quickly changes and rushes off to the game. On the way there, he averages 95 miles per hour, gets flipped off
three times, barely avoids two accidents and tailgates nine people before
he makes it to the parking lot. Dave rushes to his seat and finds that Rob
isn't there yet. Rob arrives ten minutes later and Dave thinks to himself, "Rob left before me and I still beat him here, he must not be a very good driver."
-
A man is driving through a remote small mid-west town late on a sunday
evening. Each block he drives by has a stop sign and a four way
intersection. After 9 blocks of driving and stopping at every
intersection and then continueing on as the only car on the road the man
gets fed up with the situation and yells , " This is nonsence." As he
approaches the 10th intersection he looks at the stop sign,decides
not to stop, and cruises right through it. Moments later he sees blue
light in the rear view mirror and is soon getting a ticket from one of
the town's two cops. he comments on his bad luck to the officer and the
officer replys," Luck Hah, me and Frankie, we just wait on oppsite sides
of town fer travelers like yourself to get frustrated so wees can make
our monthly quota."
- Dave, who is inattentive in the morning, until he drinks his coffee, drives to work at 7:00 a.m. and meets slow moving traffic half way to work. It is stop and go, stop and go. This continues for two weeks, until Dave, tired of always having to sla
m on his brakes and spill his coffee the second half of the way to work, decides that tomorrow he'll leave at 5:00 a.m. The next day he's barreling along at 65 miles per hour enjoying the lack of traffic and as he reaches down to grab his coffee cup his
car fades little to the left, he doesn't notice, and he hits a car that has pulled off to the curb to fix a flat tire. He dies of fatal head injuries with his hand still clasping his cup of spilt coffee.