G16 Forum Discussions Part 2
Date:
Aftershock,
My post was not a moral attack on
bigger males in a pathetic attempt reassure myself that I'm a good person. Infact, I
honestly wrote that I was "jealous" of Alpha-male, admitted that bigger males
win most of the time, and wished I could trade places.
But you're reply was a satirical
response. It tried to point out fallacies of my personality, but I already admitted them
in the post. But what you said did help in reinforcing my idea that men need to dominate
each other. Physcially or intellectually. If neither, then by shrewd mocking.
It was FULL of personal attacks
against me, but that's OK because I'm used to it. That's not what bothers me. Infact,
nothing that you wrote bothered me, but it did shock me for a good 5 minutes.
You're right, and I'm wrong. That's
usually the case anyway.
-Atlas
Date:
Aftershock,
Oh yeah, you're second hypothesis
dosen't make sense. Aftershock’s Hypothesis #2: Smaller, “weaker” men have
more ambition than "stronger" men but lack the desire to achieve.
Isn't ambition and the desire to
achieve the same thing?
-Atlas
Date:
Name: Aftershock
In response to Atlas:
I like your ideas. They make me
think. Keep them!
Date:
Well hello everyone *in creepy
voice*,
Today I went to
I was cruising in the water by
myself-no one around me-when this stupid @$$ swims right next to me...like 10 ft away. I
turn to this katonk like WTF?!(<---hope I can put this!)I was a little pissed cause out
of the whole damn ocean he has to plop himself right next to me. Next, he cuts me off...5
freekin times! If I was going for a wave, he'd swim right in front of me so I'd hae to
move. I was really pissed off then. I was thinking all the stuff I was gonna say to him:
'What?! You wanna settle this on the beach?' or 'You know what you prick, you wait till
you get out of the water so I can kick your @$$'. I tried SO hard to cross
the red bridge but it wasn't working. I mean, I starting singing to myself, thought that
maybe it was just me, ANYTHING, but it wasn't working.
I mean, my thoughts were positive,
but I still felt like kicking the crap out of this punk. I was totally unsuccessful in
changing my mood and did not cross the red bridge. GRRRR! HE WAS DOING IT ON PURPOSE!!!
AAAAHH! Well, in the end my friends saw me, knew I was amping out, and so we paddled back
in.
On a positive note-after we toweled
off, we went to Magoo's! =)
Date:
Earlier this week, I was driving my
friend in to school, and he was very upset because a car cut me off. He was trying to honk
my horn for me, and was telling me that I should go cut him off back. That was really
really startling to me. I mean, my friend wasn't even driving, and he was very upset. I
tried to explain to him that it was ok, and no one was hurt, and nothing would be gained
out of chasing him down and cutting him off, but my friend still wanted to at least catch
up to him so he could flick the guy off and swear at him. I did not, and I told my friend
to calm down.
Date:
Name: Donovan
frankychan
2/18/02 8:45pm franky- I know what you mean. Did you try talking to him? Or maybe next
time you could move away from him. I know that it's inconvenient, but it could have saved
you from getting so angry...
Date:
Computer can be a great source of
help as well as a great source of pain in the ass. I was writing this super-doper reply to
Atlas regarding my feelings about alpha males (no, I am not going to write it again cause
it took me half an hour). I was pretty proud of what I had to say and decided to post the
message. Well, what do you know? My connection to the web was lost. Needless to say, I
lost the whole half hour of work and the worth of brian cells. Okay, I said to myself,
thats the nature of computers. So I logged on again and decided to switch gear and wrote
an email to my brother. It took me some good thoughts to write it because it is a delicate
situation with him. But regardless, I sqeezed the email out of myself after another half
an hour. "Send mail", I pressed, well, what do you know again!! "Warning.
Your connection to AOL is lost. Please sign on again." Well, Mr. Computer, thanks for
pointing out the obvious because I am so upset at you at this point that Im sure I wouldnt
be able to figure that out had you not point it out!!! I am mostly mad because it wasted
an hour of my time. As I am writing this, I am still trying to cross the bridge. I hope in
the process of composing this piece, I can calm myself down. It aint easy. But if it cuts
me off again, you can bet there will be a hole in the computer in the DWMC household.
-DWMC
Date:
Let's see, this past weekend I went
to
In response to dudewheresmycar #248,
I know exactly what you mean! On Wednesday I was typing a topic paper for women studies
about an hour and a half before the class. I finished the paper about 10 minutes before
class. I tried to save it, and as soon as I pushed save it said, "An error in the
application has occured. This program will now close." I crossed no bridge either. I
yelled @#%! pretty loud. I think this foreign student was afraid because she was next to
me and she stood up and left, but that's beside the point :). Nah, but I think in
situations like that, it's hard to reason with yourself. You (well me too) can't help but
get mad. You know you typed in, and you know you're gonna have to type it again. I'm sure
it has happened to many people before. That's just a sucky situation. At least you got a
message up now. Anyways, take it easy.
Date:
In Response to Frankychan
I thought your episode was funny,
cause my friend when we were in highschool, caught this wave that a local surfer(which
will remain nameless) was going to catch and the "surfer" got so mad at him that
he paddled up to my friend, swore at him and dunked his head in the water. This obviously
is not the right way to handle things. I think you handled the situation quite well
considering other people I've seen, I mean if you hadn't surfed in a long time...you
wouldn't want somebody taking your waves. I guess crossing the red bridge is hard, did you
try singing, "It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood," by Mr. Rogers. That
song always cheers me up! OR next time go country, there's less people and more space.
Date:
On Thursday night I had to study for
this test. It looked really hard when the prof. was going over it in class. All I could
think was that I wouldn't be able to understand or memorize any of this stuff. I mean I'm
not a neuroscientist. I told myself, "okay you gotta stuff all this junk in your head
and it's not doing you any good to have a pitty party for yourself." So I got myself
a big huge cup of mocha coffee, and told myself, "You can do it!" I had started
reviewing a week before, but got caught in the negative about self and couldn't cross the
blue bridge, but this time I successfully crossed into the the positive about self. I
decided that thinking about how badly I was going to fail on a class was not helping me
get any closer to studying or understanding the material. At the end of the night I
thought I can't think anymore and I fell asleep. The next morning I woke up and tried to
remember what I had studied. I remembered some of it and decided I would get to school on
time and study there. When I got there I was studying and then the fire alarm went off,
the class waited outside and there was no fire. That threw off my concentration and after
all this occured my teacher came and we took the test, I ended up taking the test
thinking, "Oh no I didn't get to refresh my memory and I'm going to fail!" but
then I thought "maybe others will fail and we will get a second chance on an easier
test!"
Date:
Name: Atlas
Aftershock,
I'm glad my ideas make you think. Do
your own ideas make you think? I like to trade ideas, but not when it's just
from-me-to-you. Lets make this a fair exchange.
-Atlas
Date:
re: Dudewheresmycar
That happened to me when I wrote my
original draft of "Males and the need for dominance." I spent almost two hours
writing the damn thing and when I clicked "OK" to post, it said "Connection
lost." I couldn't recover it so I had to re-write it again. The second draft lost
much of the punch the first one had.
I spent too much time thinking about
clever crap to post and not enough time on my report 1 draft.
-Atlas
Date:
In response to Raemie Monces (Test
Anxiety) I understand how you feel about taking test. I get that way too with subjects I
have a difficult time understanding. I automatically think that I'm already going to do
bad on the test. This then keeps me in the negative zone. However, I then start to think
that there are just some subjects that I really have to work on and if I get down on
myself because I don't catch I'm just so bummed. I have a midterm on Thursday for a class
that I had to take over again and I'm already thinking that I'm going to bomb. However, I
thought to myself that this kind of thinking will not get me anywhere. It's a
self-fulfilling prophecy. Although I have a hard time with the clinical and methodology of
psychology if I just took things one day at a time in just going over my notes and reading
the chapters over again then it wouldn't be so bad because in doing this I guess I'll
probably help myself with remembering terms I don't know.
Date:
I serve tables at a restaurant.
Anybody who has ever worked in a restaurant before can understand that people can be so
incredibly rude and irritating sometimes. Every time I work, there is always at least one
table who doesn't like what their eating or drinking and feels that they should let me
know. Well, last night at work I had the customers from hell. There were some that didn't
tip, some that tipped but it was so small they shouldn't have bothered, and then there
were the rude ones who complained about everything. It is nights like these where I have
to have the utmost patience and persistence to just get through the night without telling
a customer off. It's really hard, but I try not to let it get to me. There is nothing that
I can really do to change the way my customers act, so I have to find a way to keep them
from getting to me. With the bridge technique, I just remind myself that not all customers
are like this. In fact, there are often customers that are really nice, or tip really
well. The other way that I deal with this is not really using the bridge technique, but it
keeps my mind off it and it makes me feel better. Luckily, there are other servers that I
can talk to and who have to go through the same things. So, often we'll just complain to
each other or make jokes about the bitchy customers. Usually, I'll end up laughing so hard
that the customers don't even bother me anymore.
Date:
In response to Maylyn, I too have
had to take a class over again, and its not that bad. Just think, you probably already had
the material once. Even if you didn't understand it the first time, you were at least
exposed to it, which makes you that much better off than someone who has never seen the
material before. Then only problem that I ran into was the pressure to do well. Since I
messed up the first time, I felt an even greater tendency to do well, to compensate for
the last time. However, thinking like that got me no where. I just had to take it one day
at a time, like you said, and had to have the confidence in myself that I could do it.
Date:
going down that spiral of
hopelessness again ... ... I realize how pathetic this is, but this is also something that
I have noticed for a long time ... I go through cyles of self-bashing. I am always on the
verge of feeling angry and/or irritated, then I find hope and hold on for the brief ride
unless something happens to either validate or invalidate the situation, then I'm either
back in the cycle or riding that wave of hope and validation (I thank the compulsory
education system and the grading system for that ingrained psychotic need for validation
and success -- but that's a different story). You may want to get used to me trying to
explain myself before expressing myself ... (sigh) Well, as some of you may recall, I
coach a speech & debate team at a local high school. We've been having an unbelievably
successful year but I've been looking ahead and trying to plan next year (as I believe
leaders should). Since most of my kids will either be graduating or leaving for the
mainland (military families), I have been worrying that next year we will not have a team,
or that we won't have the momentum to get back to where we are this year. Of coarse, as a
debate coach I can prove or disprove this idea, but since success requires work, it is
easier to believe in failure. Still, I am trying to continue to remain hopeful -- thank
Pandora for that. I asked a friend about their opinion on this matter and he reminded me
that I thought this exact same thing last year when I was trying to plan the current
school year. Which brings me back to this "cycle" of mine... (sigh)
Date:
Re: Loqour -Debate team
I think everybody goes through these
cycles, some more so than others. I am going through one myself lately. I moved from the
mainland(midwest) yet again for the 3rd time, where I wholeheartedly cannot stand. But
unexpectedly, things were going alright just before I left. Then I moved here, everything
has been a funk. No momentum what-so-ever to speak of. There are days every so often when
I'd feel sharp and charming. Yet, for the most part, I just feel normal and trying to
upshift from the 1st gear. My point is, I know what you mean.
As far as your debate team, I think
you said it best. Its really just worries. Worries about things which are out of your
control. The kids will leave whether you dig it or not. Why not focus your energy on
things that you can put a hand on; recuriting for example.
Date:
09:24pm Feb 19, 2002 HST
Name: Misty
Today when I got home from school I
opened a window to let some air in the house, and saw this little bratty neighbor of mine
repeatedly bouncing her ball on my car. I immediately fell into option 1, filled with
rage. This little brat is nine and this is not the first time I have seen her do something
to my car. The first time I talked to her parents, the second time I talked to her, and
this time I did nothing. I figured that maybe this brat wants my attention and by talking
to her about not bothering my car, is giving her the attention she wants. I feel much rage
for this brat because of what she is doing to my car and have stopped saying hi to her
when I see her outside. I do not know what the best approach to take would be in getting
this brat to stop messing with my car, so that I can cross the red bridge?
Date:
09:36pm Feb 19, 2002 HST
This is in responce to Maylyn #256.
Just like you feel like you are already going to fail a test that has not happened yet, I
also sometimes feel that I won't be able to complete projects or papers in time for the
due dates. What I do is try to work on these things a little everyday, so that when a due
date or test arrives I am ready. I know that it takes a lot of discipline to do a little
everyday. I do it because I am a mom now and don't have the luxery of pulling an all-
nighter.
Date:
10:34pm Feb 19, 2002 HST
Tonight was not a good night to be
with my boyfriend. He was having problems at work and I was already irritated with having
to come home to a dirty house just because his family had visited and not cleaned up their
mess. Plus my refridgerator is not working so I had to drive in traffic to get a new one.
And a old lady started yelling at me because she didn't know how to drive. So when I came
to take the clothes to the laundry mat my boyfriend and I started arguing and one thing
led another and we said things we really didn't mean. I know I was both in the red and the
blue negative but at the time I wasn't in the mood to cross over. now I'm sitting hear
typing this knowing that I should have maybe not consolidated my anger and vented it out
on him when in reality I 'm not mad at him or atleast only him.
Date:
10:36pm Feb 19, 2002 HST
In response to Misty I agree that
maybe she wants attention. But what way would be appropriate and bennificial for you and
her? Maybe she needs a friend or friends to keep her busy and not bored bouncing a ball on
your car
Date:
10:38pm Feb 19, 2002 HST
This week my girlfriend really made
me angry. She expected me to remember what she was doing a particular night, (If she tells
me anything I will be in trouble if I forget it.) anyway I called her house and got her
mom. Then the next day I asked "why didn't you call me when you got the message from
your mom, did you go out drinking?" . Her response was, "I'm so angry at you.
You never remember anything I tell you. I HATE YOU!" wholly XXXX!! What kind of
response is that? I became immediately enraged that she would say that to me. My thinking
was impaired but I managed to keep my mouth closed until I had crossed the red bridge.
Then I responded calmly without cursing or calling names. I was able to calm her and me
down. I guess it is easier to cross the bridge with someone you love. I would probably not
have crossed it if it were a stranger disrespecting me or verbally assaulting me.
Date:
10:39pm Feb 19, 2002 HST
to Misty (post #261,
Truthfully, if I was you I'd yell at
the kid first thing. I'd probably say something like "HEY! STOP BOUNCING YOUR BALL ON
MY CAR YOU LITTLE BRAT!" (no joke) so I commend you on not snapping at the youth.
If you haven't done so already, you
should talk to the parents again and tell them that their kid is not respectin' your
property. Maybe they figured the first time was a one time thing but if you press home the
point, maybe they'll get the idea.
But if that doesn't work you can
always flatten that kid's ball! =P
Date:
10:43pm Feb 19, 2002 HST
To me old people are the worst
drivers. It's not the young ones but the ones who can't see or hear and don't have a fast
enough reaction. Today a old lady and her husband (or atleast a man she was with) were
coming out of Daie I stopped but she stopped instead of crossing the road, so I proceded
to go then out of nowhere she starts walking across the road and screams at me that I am
so rude. First of all she didn't even look she just walked and then I just honked my horn
at her and drove off. In this case I said yeah I know your their red bridge but it just
felt alot better at the time to honk my horn at the grouchy old lady. Plus while on the
freeway, a old man didn't even look before turning into my lane almost running me off the
road. I slammed on my breaks and honked my horn. He couldn't even hear me and just kept on
going. If I didn't have any one in the car I would have probably stayed in the red zone
and flipped the guy off. But I ended up breathing and saying "he's just old".
Date:
10:44pm Feb 19, 2002 HST
Name: frankychan
to Raemie
Thanks, but I can't believe that
someone would actually swim up to someone else and dunk someone's head in the water! I
would at least swim up to the guy and tell him 'what?!'
As for singing the "It's a
Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood"...uhhh, I was singing "Simmer Down" by
the Mighty Mighty Bosstones. It actually calmed me down! Go figure!
Date:
10:46pm Feb 19, 2002 HST
in response to sublime I agree with
the way you handled it good job
Date:
10:46pm Feb 19, 2002 HST
In response to samantha 263:
I think it is important to talk with
your boyfriend about what happened and how you can avoid such future disputes. If I am
angry at my girl I always want to talk it out right then. Sometimes it isn't the best
thing but steaming about something for a couple hours or days is worst. Hopefully your
boyfriend can also work on crossing the red and blue bridge. If both of you can do that
you will be in great shape. My girlfriend's changing moods really effect my moods. I have
to learn how to not let them effect me so much.
Date:
10:51pm Feb 19, 2002 HST
Wow, Samantha sounds like old people
and you have quite a bit of close calls. When the old guy finally sees you, he will
probably be so scared he won't need any more verbal abuse to make him learn his lesson.
Hopefully he will be shook up and more careful.
Date:
03:13pm Feb 20, 2002 HST
In response to sublime I think you
handled things well with your girlfriend. If that were me and someone yelled at me for not
reminding them something I probably would have yelled back or said something stupid like
if you know you have to do something why don't you write it down, dang you're old enough.
With a person doing what my first reaction told me to do it would probably make the
situation worst.
Date:
03:22pm Feb 20, 2002 HST
I just got the topic on what my
professor for my women's studies class wants us to write about. All I could think about
was what the hell. She wants us to write a paper and I have no idea what the hell she
talks about half the time in class. I just wanted an elective, but with my schedule and
all that's the only class under the women's studies department that was available. More
so, the class is on the inequality of women and it's cross listed as an economics class
and I don't know squat about economics. With all of this in head I thought to myself that
she's willing to help students with drafts, so it probably wouldn't be so bad. If I picked
topics in the book that really interest me and discuss them her 5-6 page essay wouldn't be
so bad. I was in the negative zone about my self for a while, but was able to cross the
bridge when I told myself even though this is one of my tough classes she's pretty good in
explaining to students when they don't understand and I can always schedule meetings with
her to help me with my paper.
Date:
04:18pm Feb 20, 2002 HST
In response to Maylyn
Sometimes, all of us have no idea
and don't know what to do with a paper due on tomorrow or today afternoon. It is good to
make the bridge early because it will give more time for you to think and write. When we
need to do something, at first we make prejudice- pre judgement. According to social
psychology class, it is our rule of thumb. There could be some negative prejudice or the
positive one. In your case, you already constructed bridge for the negative one. That is
good. Skyrunner
- 04:37pm Feb 20, 2002 HST (#274
of 1145)
Pleasant bridge is contagious and
expandable even from positive mood
I found we can make a bridge when we
are in the positive mood not to the negative mood but to the more positive mood. I played
golf with my father visiting here for 3 days in Turtle Bay Hilton yesterday. I went to
Waikiki to rent a car. Since it was a holiday, so many people rented cars already and only
manual Suzuki Samurai (Jeep) was left. I used to drive manuel before so that it was not a
problem. However, when I took the car, my left foot didn't reach the cluth. I guess
Americans have long legs. We made it by almost kicking the sit from the back. It was an
old car. The milege didn't work so I couldn't figure out how old it is. As I drive near
Pali Hwy, I wanted to listen to music. It didn't work. I didn't try to make any bridge
because I was in the so pleasant mood and I thought of tee time. It was a perfect day for
golf. I met a couple from North Carolina. Only husband played and the wife read a book on
the cart. He gave water to the grass sometimes when it was needed. He sometimes picked up
our club like pitching wedge and handed it over to us after finishing the putting. Good
manner was a good way to construct a bridge.
Date:
04:43pm Feb 20, 2002 HST
Yesterday after the long weekends, I
left my dorm room 4 minutes before the class. It was just enough time to get to the
classroom with my bike. However, I found that my front wheel was stolen so that I ran to
the class but got there late. The topic of the class was PTSD and sadness. I thought of my
emotion. I was upset but not sad. I couldn't understand why people steel something. In the
evening, I decided to use my mother's bike rather than buying the new wheel. As I change
the bike I found my mother's bike has breaks on the front and the back. Then I thought it
would be much safer in the rainy days. I thanked that I could ride safer one by this
event. Later I found it was the bridge I constructed.
Date:
07:20pm Feb 20, 2002 HST
Today in one of my psych classes i
just wanted to scream and tell the class to shut the f*** up. There are always discussions
about stupid sh!t, but todays one was over the top. They were discussing about how it is
unfair that women have to have the babies and can't go back to work right away and other
bull sh!t involved with having babies. First of all that class is hot, and second i was
like if you are complaining about having kids then the solution is simple....don't have
one. But these girls in my class are like trying to fight for equality, thats fine but the
level that they are taking it to is ridiculous. They just irrated the shit out of me. F***
those people just need to wake the f*** up and accept the things they cannot change. The
way that i made myself cross the bridge is that i left class for a while, but i needed to
return because i had to turn in this boys paper. during my break i was thinking about why
these girls are so negative about having children, i personally think that women are lucky
to be able to give birth. i can't understand them but instead of feeling like crap because
of them i decided to just let my feelings go.
Date:
07:25pm Feb 20, 2002 HST
In response to Kailua....
Well i am sorry to hear that you
lost a lot of money. It sure does suck how that dealer just seemed to always beat you
especially since you had such good cards. i think that it was good that you walked off the
table. well hopefully you will have better luck next time you go to Vegas.
Date:
07:30pm Feb 20, 2002 HST
Some Professors are unbelievable. I
had ti miss class today for family reason, my daughter has been sick and I called this
professor three times and let him know what was going on, and in class today he made it a
big deal that I was not there. He must not have listened to his messages. I have a friend
in the class and when I called her to find out what I was missing she told me about what
he had said. He did not know that I have a daughter and he thought that I was making this
line up so I could miss class. Then he started to say that I was to young to have a child
and that he could not believe that I had a child. I find this rude and I want to talk to
him but I don't see how this will make the situation any. I am a mother and proud of it. I
am not a young mother, but rather an average age mother. My question is, what if I was
young and had a child, is that any of his concern? I am a mother trying to get her
education and I just keep telling myself that I am one term from being graduated so don't
worry about this "a**"! I am still shocked that he said anything and I know that
when I return to class on Friday he is going to pick on me... What should I do?
Date:
07:55pm Feb 20, 2002 HST
Re: Maylyn (ECONOMICS)
Here are the major economic theories
to help you later on in your Women's Studies Class.
---------------------------------------------------------------
Democratic Party (Liberalism): You have two cows. The government takes most of the milk
and your neighbors vote on who gets it.
Republican Party (Conservatism): You
have two cows. The government takes some of the milk and gives it to your neighbors, and
then makes you baptize the cow.
Green Party (Democratic Socialism):
You have two cows. The government takes most of the milk and gives it to your neighbors,
sues you for either not making enough milk or making too much milk, and then nationalizes
your farm.
Reform Party (Fundamentalism): You
have two cows. The government takes some of the milk and gives it to your neighbors, and
then excommunicates your cows for blasphemous behavior (indulgent grazing, public nudity,
and pre-marital mating)
Socialism: You have two cows. The
government takes all of the milk and redistributes it to everyone else. All the farmers
stop milking their cows since they know it will be confiscated anyway, and then everyone
starves.
Fascism: You have two cows. The
government says it will let you keep them, until it decides to draft you. The government
still takes your cows.
Communism: You have two cows. The
government takes your cows and puts them in to a barn with everyone else’s cows. Then
you get shot.
Anarchism: You have two cows. Your
neighbors across the street say they will not shoot you if you give them most of the milk.
Your neighbors behind you tell you the same thing.
Feudalism: You have two cows. The
King takes one cow, most of the milk, and sleeps with your bride.
Capitalism: You have two cows. You
sell half your milk at a profit. With the surplus you either buy another cow to increase
production, or buy your neighbors vegetables, depending on supply and demand, inflation,
interests rates, market stability, etc… etc…
-Atlas
Date:
08:11pm Feb 20, 2002 HST
To slick
I can't believe that your prof would
say that kinda crap! One of my friends has had an incident w/her prof. She was in the
hospital w/kidney stones and told her prof what was up. The prof was being a total choad
about it and even threatened to give her a harder test! You know what I figured...some
prof's over here get really "big-headed" and forget that
are paying them.
Now, I'm not saying that All prof's are bad--in fact, most are good but it's that small
few that spoil the rest--but those "big headed" profs should remember that at
one time in their lives, they were students too!
Anyway, what you could do is just go
to class and see whether or not he actually does pick on you. If he pushes the point, you
can show proof after class that you do have a daughter and needed to take care of her.
Maybe express you feelings in a non-accusative tone.
You don't have to listen to me, but
I can empathize w/ya! Persevere cause after this semester, its P-A-R-T-Y T-I-M-E !!!
?
thinks for a minute* Oh wait, graduation="real" job.....aw man!
Atlas-I resent your view on
communism! True, we are bred to hate communism, but communism (ideally) is supposed to
benefit society...unfortunately, w/power comes corruption. =(
Date:
08:37pm Feb 20, 2002 HST
Okay for all you ladies out there
who get the Victoria's Secret catalogue, does it ruin your day? About a month ago I
ordered a pair of jeans from them, waited and waited, they finally came! Well they did not
fit so well, and they sure did not look any thing like they did on the model. I started to
feel horrible inside as I looked in the mirror, I could feel the horrible rush of emotion
that was coming. So many times I had been here before, beating myself up because I'm a
size 12 not 4. Well before I could promise myself I would starve it all week, I put on my
jogging cloths and went for a really long run. This helped me to get in touch with my true
feelings about myself and to sooth the pain I felt when I looked in the mirror. I have now
tried to get on an exercise regimen and it is helping me to not feel so bad about my
weight.
Date:
09:06pm Feb 20, 2002 HST
In resonse to Maylyn #273. Way to
hang in there!
Date:
11:13pm Feb 20, 2002 HST
Dude where's my car (BTW - was that
movie worth seeing, I haven't seen it yet?), thank you for your kind words of support. I
agree. Sometimes a worry far too much. And we are currently working on recruiting on the
intermediate level for next year's freshmen.
Date:
11:20pm Feb 20, 2002 HST
response to Kailua #145 I'm sorry
that this seems so late. I tried to respond to this earlier and I was rudely booted off
the net. Sometimes I wonder if there's some evil freak randomly kicking people off and
laughing at them ... anyhow, I just wanted to say that I believe that you reacted quite
"appropriately" in that situation at work. Catharsis, as long as you aren't
hurting anyone, is important and helpful. Plus, it takes someone with strong communication
skills to leave a situation such as yours with all parties being satisfied. Too bad that
guy wasn't able to bend a little, but gratefully, there are people like that other woman
who tend to "help take up the slack".
Date:
11:41pm Feb 20, 2002 HST
Today, wednesday, I attended my
usual weekly work meeting. After doing a "feelings check" -- in which I
announced that I was feeling tired, stressed, and a little irritated (just refer to this
tuesday's well presented class discussion on the influences of mood and affect) -- then he
mentioned that he was upset because of something happening within the company. He said he
couldn't say what exactly, but added that it has happened before. I have been with this
company for almost 4 years (allow me to also add that this is a state agency). This is my
"real" job (teaching debate and latin and all that volunteer family court
business, I do all that stuff because I enjoy it, but THIS job is so that I can live in my
humble apartment and eat). As a counselor, I enjoy working with the kids there, but
management ... I have seen entire programs get cut, NOT becuase they are not successful,
NOT because they lack seniority, but because the company is short on cash and needed to
cut something. I have seen a nurse, who has been with our company for 2 years, take a much
earned vacation and return without a job. And while I can actually understand why, It
still upsets me. At the meeting today someone tried to justify some of this by saying,
"well, the good thing is that nothing will happen to OUR program". And, yes,
that is the optomistic way to look, but how can you feel security in a company where cuts
are as random as those made by the grim-reaper.
Date:
12:55am Feb 21, 2002 HST
would like to respond to
Jeany,-hey girl!! Don'tyou know that Victoria Secrets is definitely NOT a company that
sells quality clothes? Before you make the mistake of ordering clothing from the catalog
for a second time, take into account the type of garment that you are considering. I have
heard stories about girls who were hoping for a glamourous, sexy outfit and what they
received was a cheap, poorly made body covering. Besides that it was overpriced- made from
poor quality fabric, and too big!The clothes look great because of the lighting
-especially the dresses- have you noticed this in the fall/ winter catalogues? O.K.-
That's enough VS bashing, (for a life-time); time to address what actually made you upset
when you received your pants. You have probably heard this before,but size 12 is a couple
of sizes SMALLER than the national average!! Please STOP torturing yourself by comparing
yourself to a model, whose main pursuit in life is to stay in shape, just to maintain her
career!!! Naturally, it is important to exercise, and to limit our food choices to healthy
food, but it is just as important to be happy with who we are. This may sound corny, but,
a confident person is attractive on various levels, not only because of appearances!! I
think it was good that you seem to have stopped yourself from wallowing in your regret of
being size 12. By exercising, you crossed the bridge through physical action and exercise
is a usefull way to change.
Date:
01:03am Feb 21, 2002 HST
slick - 07:30pm Feb 20, 2002 HST
(#279 of 286)
Your professor is a d***head for
saying what he did. I can't believe that he/she would say such a thing!! You would expect
someone in a professional field at the university-level would be more open minded and
understanding. And, even if they weren't at least have the damn common decency to keep
their mouth shut from expressing their personal opinions on their students. Sheesh.
Jeany - (#282 of 286)
Ugh, I know how you feel. I wish I
was a size 3 and not a size 9. I don't bother looking at those glamour magazines because
it depresses me.
Speaking of your post, I had a
similar experience today. I just went to the UH health clinic and found out that according
to the height-weight ratio chart, I'm "supposedly" 10-15 pounds overweight. Too
good, huh? I gained weight in high school and somehow been losing it slowly over the past
year (I'm not dieting or anything l'dat) ... but I've never had thought my weight was that
bad. Until a few months ago, when a doc I saw at the UH clinic mentioned that I was
"obese."
That's good that you started on an
exercise regimen ... weight issues aside, it'll benefit your body and cardiovascular
system. Also, a very good way to get rid of stress. Good luck and you go girl! (lol, 90's
slang!)
Date:
11:54am Feb 21, 2002 HST
In response to slick #279, what your
professor did was wrong. He should not bring a students personal business into his
classroom. If I were you I would definitely go and talk to him. You don't necessarily have
to be rude about it, but you can let him know that you know what he said to the class, and
that you would appreciate it if he checked his messages and left your personal life out of
his class. Otherwise, you could risk the chance of this happening to you again. Well,
that's just what I would do, but it may not be the best option. Whatever you choose to do,
I hope it works out. I also hope that your stupid professor doesn't do that again, because
what he did was clearly inappropriate and WRONG.
Date:
12:10pm Feb 21, 2002 HST
There are some days that just take
forever to end. Today was one of those days. I had so many things to do and I just needed
the day to be over so that all my things would be done. Unfortunately, it just seemed to
drag. So, I decided to try and not think about all the things I had to do, and just do
them. This worked for a little while, because it got me in a better, more positive mood.
Also, the day didn't seem to take so long. However, as soon as I got home, I realized all
the things I have to do tomorrow and over the weekend. It's so depressing, I just wish
school would be over already.
Date:
12:13pm Feb 21, 2002 HST
you should really say something to
that teacher because no matter what he thinks whatever you do is your own business. And on
top of that for him to bring up soomething like that in class is even more messed up. he
should atleast have the decency to pull you on the side after class and approach you about
it then rather than blowing it up out of proportion and making a spectacle of the whole
thing. Or maybe he likes you and that is his way of trying to get your attention. hmmm.
Date:
12:19pm Feb 21, 2002 HST
The other day I was going to work
and there was a lot of traffic. I was running a little late so I felt pretty rushed.
Everywhere I went no one would let me cut in front of them, and everyone just kept cutting
everyone else off. I promise that I almost saw like 10 accidents and everytime something
like that happened no one would appologize to anyone else. No one thought that they had
done anything wrong. I would have said before that the people who are driving have a
problem, but now I think that society has breed a generation of people that can't help but
being rude and inconsiderate and I think that maybe we need another tragedy thing to
happen to help people realize that things aren't as bad as they think they are.
Date:
02:49pm Feb 21, 2002 HST
Just wanted to say thanks to
Skyrunner, Jeany, and Atlas.
Date:
02:58pm Feb 21, 2002 HST
In response to Jeany (Victoria
Secret) I understand how you feel about wanting to look and be like those models. I feel
that way sometimes. I'm not as thin as my sister, but she kind of made me feel
uncomfortable just because I put on 10 lbs. I lost 5, but her and my mom still get on my
case. Honestly, I think it is unhealthy to want to be as thin as a model. I know I'll
never be as thin as that, but I can eat healthier and work on other things about me, such
as, being a better person. I'm not that tall either and I'm Filipino, so my mom and my
sister have this thing where Asian women are suppose to be petite. I know it sucks
sometimes the way we're bombarded on what beauty is suppose to be about, but hang in
there.
Date:
03:33pm Feb 21, 2002 HST
Hey everyone:) I have been doing a
lot of thinking on the meaning of life and moral philosophy. I do indeed disturb myself. I
was upset at myself for allowing myself to be disturbed. (Does this make sense so far?)
Anyways, while I was feeling upset at myself, my mind just screamed "Get over it and
move on!" I sat there for awhile and said "yeah, why don't I just get over it
and move on?" How simple...now I have a motto to live by. This was a few days ago and
I just feel so much better because of this motto and my resolve to live by it.
This week has been rather good. I
feel happy and have noticed that people have seemed nicer in general...maybe it's because
I don't feel angry at the world for once and allowed myself to view the good that I
usually oversee or take for granted. I took a chemistry exam last week and got back my
score. I got a C. Normally that would have upset me because I studied hard for that exam.
But I just said to myself "no biggie, you're allowed to drop your lowest score...just
try to kick @ss on the next one" and that was that. I didn't ruminate on how much I
studied or came up with my usual paranoid theories that the world is out to get me and
wants to see me fail. I hope I can continue to use my motto and continue to see the good
things in life:)
Date:
03:47pm Feb 21, 2002 HST
In Response to Psyloche
I just wanted to say that I can
totally understand about your loss. My dog Scrappy died over 3 years ago and I still miss
him dearly. I had him since the 5th grade! I grew up with him and remember all the fun and
stupid things we did together. I think of him all the time and try to remember how soft
his fur was and what he smelled like. I don't ever want to forget him. I know what
unconditional love is like because that is how he loved me and I loved him. Sure he would
misbhave, but he understood that I was not disapproving of him but his behavior.
I hope you feel better and just know
that the grief will eventually pass and you will be left with wonderful memories of you
beloved pet to share with your family.
Date:
06:49pm Feb 21, 2002 HST
Hi everyone. I am having such a
stressful week considering that the first draft of our report is due next week. Trying to
balance my time with school and work has been difficult. I just realized thatI have an
exam on the same day that my report is due and I work all weekend long. I feel so stressed
out and I felt like giving up. I felt like I wasn't going to pass and started getting down
on myslef. Telling myself I'm stupid and just ragging on myself. I tried the blue bridge
technique but that didn't help. But today, I got an interesting letter from the School of
Social Sciences. They said I made the Dean's list for last fall. That's when I started to
feel a little better. Although I didn't talk myself over the blue bridge, the letter
helped a lot in my attitude about myself and school.
Date:
07:06pm Feb 21, 2002 HST
In response to Jeany #282 (Victoria
Secret).
I know how you
feel about those models and then feeling the way you do when looking into the mirror in
the same jeans their wearing. I feel like I live with three of those models. My sisters
are thin and very beautiful. But I've been trying real hard to see myself in a different
light becuase I hate to hear that voice in my head saying, "why don't you look like
them (models or sisters)?" I'm always hearing that. Then I realized that nobody else
is calling me fat but me. Sure I'm not a size 4, or even a 9 but I guess I'd rather have a
butt than nothing at all. :) I'm trying real hard to be nicer to myself. I think we both
owe it to ourselves.
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