Leave a Message for Nitsa Mc
Carthy?PSY. 409
Nov.- 7 - 95
Dr. LEON JAMES
Week 9-11 Report
Self-assessment ratings
How difficult was this week's task (lumping all the sub-tasks
together)?
Circle one.
Very easy 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Very hard
This week's rating = 1
How much Negative emotions did it cost you, in all?
Very little 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Very much
This week's rating = 7
How Valuable for later use is this knowledge or skill going to be for
you?
Not useful 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Very useful
This week's rating = 10
How likely is it that you'll be getting good at this week's tasks?
Not likely 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Quite likely
This week's rating = 10
How satisfied are you with the computer and Internet systems?
Not satisfied 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Very satisfied
This week's rating = 5
How hard did you try to get through this week's tasks?
Gave up easily 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Refused to give
up
This week's rating = 10
Phobia, phobia, phobia! The word itself usually has a prefix that indicates what kind of phobia is being discussed or mentioned. However, I can't find a word for "fear of writing papers." I exhibit all of the symptoms of a phobia when I contemplate writing a paper. I become tense, my shoulders become all tight, and my palms become sweaty. I have a sense of being overwhelmed by the task at hand. Just to even start writing a paper involves rewriting the same sentence over and over again because I feel that my emotions, ideas and thoughts don't make sense. Publishing my reports on the WWW only further compounds the problem and makes my phobia even worse since now not only my classmates and teacher read my files, potentially, it is the whole wide world. I found myself so constantly engaged in grammar and spell checks that I believe, in the process of doing so, I had acquired a mild form of obsessive compulsive personality.
I often exprience the symptoms of techno-phobia as well. Being surrounded by vast quantities of equipment and machines and not knowing how anything works, can be frightening. I feel like an insignificant flea about to be squashed by the burden of which button or key to press. Techno-phobia spans all areas of technologies from bulldozers to computers and telephones. Probably one of the most exasperating modern technologies is voice commands. For instance, if you dial up one of the federal department's numbers it will first give you a five minute description of what the department is all about. Then it goes through categories upon categories of sections of the department. All the while it informs you that if you want such and such a number, "press it now," and if you are like me, worried that you will miss the number you will get the same message repeated to you over and over again because indeed you did miss the number. When eventually you do get to the relevant number there is inevitably another list of numbers to be listened to. It just never ends, much like Dante's nine circles of hell in the Inferno. And each time you think about calling a particular federal or state department, a gnawing fear that manifests itself in waves of nausea and sweaty palms takes over.
The Internet is just another manifestation of the bane of modern technology on civilization. Capture the correct search engine and it vomits out voluminous references that often have no connection to what I am looking for. And all of these buttons presented on the top, such as "back" and "forward;" it was with trepidation that I laid my cursor on them because I didn't know how far back or forward I was going to go. Also, the possibility that my Internet session will be canceled because of one of those endless commands that the computer tells me to follow just confirms my own doubts about towering inadequacies when faced with modern technology. Creating links typifies some of the more mundane problems. There is the constant worry that they will not work. After a while a sense of paranoia physically manifests itself. It was already below the surface and just waiting to break out onto the surface like acne.
This paranoia also takes the form of suspicions of others trying to practice mind control. By engaging in activities we are leaving behind the realties of the everyday for the realties of cyberspace (a man-made invention and therefore subject to control by man?). Information is indeed transmitted widely and into all corners of the globe but it is not verifiable. There is the possibility of the "Big Lie" with cyberspace becoming the reality of our everyday existence. For instance, this past weekend I saw Kafka with Jeremy Irons. Central to the movie's theme was the Castle and the mind controlling influence it tried to exert on the populace of the town. Dr. Mauner, the mad doctor in the movie, was trying to discern how the brain works by reducing it to its fundamental scientific traits. By knowing the secrets of the mind (via science) he could control the world. The potential of abuse of science by people to control the thoughts and actions of the citizens heightens the sense of loss of control people feel they have over their lives. This sense of lack of control is greatly enhanced when they have no understanding of what they are doing or of the technology that they are using. In all forms of media, perceptions and beliefs are subtly influenced. For instance, when we read a newspaper, are we reading a newspaper with stories but are also reading the reflection of the proprietors of these magazines? It is never blatant because human beings are too pompous in the belief that they could succumb to something as silly as mind control. But our perceptions and interpretations of the world around us are fed by what we read, see, and hear. The Internet, therefore, becomes a potential powerful tool of propaganda where as in the Soviet Union during the Stalin's era we invent our own histories and believe them to be true. It is not necessary to have an absolute majority, but a majority of believers is enough. Therefore, the fear of technology as a tool that could be abused by some in trying to control the behavior of others is greatly increased.
Being confronted by a technology that works in ways that appear
incomprehensible gives me the feeling that I'm only a small fly on the wall and
only heightens my phobia. I can no longer understand the whirr of the machine
or why it is making such a noise. Feeling like I no longer have any control
over what I ever did, this sense of helplessness of being tossed around in a
sea of technology over which I have no control reduces my sense of value as
human being. I become nothing more than a lighted candle feebly trying to hold
onto its precious flame while the powerful cold winds from the Arctic north
blow with all of their might. The candle sputters out leaving nothing but an
acrid smell of burning wax of what once was. This is so with technology too.
Machines replacing man. Another life is regarded as worthless because it has
been replaced by a machine, replaced by machines that I neither understand nor
love.
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