Report 4

My Involvement In Internet


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MOTIVATIONS


I have mentioned what is my motivation to take this class in my Report Two in the beginning. I found it irritating to see my boyfriend having so much fun on his computer while I was sitting in front of the computer waiting for him like a fool. I, therefore, decided to do something about this, so I took this class. I wanted to learn more about the internet and about the computer in order to be able to have fun together with my boyfriend, as well as to stop being a fool in the internet world.


As the class went on, I found myself became very addicted to writing programs for my pages on the internet. I discovered the great sense of accomplishment each time when I see my work on Netscape. This sense of accomplishment is extremely rewarding to me.


Friends told me about how much they enjoyed it, and the suggestions and comments which they gave were very encouraging, although not every suggestions and comments were pleased to listen to. I still found their sincerity and attention very heart-warming, because it takes time to look at the information on Netscape. I know they are very busy like me, but they still took the time. I felt our friendships amid of all echoes in our lives, in this world.


Curiosity and stobbornness were the other motivations which kept me going especially when I was impatient and upset with the computer, with the net or with myself. I am the kind of person who like to challenge oneself. The more it seems impossible, the more I will try to prove it possible, unless it is something unreasonable to me. If there is a very dim light at the end of a dark hall, I still think it is possible to go through, but not without hardships, persistance, and determination. I like to explore, so I love traveling. In the net, I travel the world through the computer. Although, in my opinion, it is obviously much less attractive than being in the place physically, but it is still something fresh and interesting.


The responsibility of being a proper and fit student also played a big role in helping me to finish my work on time, even it means staying up in the nights even when I was sick. I think it is very important to give my professors a good image of myself, although I tried and am still trying to be a good person inside. In Chinese culture, the heart of being responsible is very important and is very traditional, but sadly, I realized that people are becoming less and less responsible and selfish as the world advances away.


  • Report one: My travel through G1 & G2

  • Report three: My searching experience in Internet



    CONFLICTS


    Doing work on net, the biggest problem was that I don't have a computer at home. I often had to go to my boyfriend's house and to use his computer. His house-mates are primarily made up of Asian students, both males and females, from Hong Kong, China and Korea. As being alone in one room with my boyfriend at night and most of the time overnight to do my work, some of the house-mates began to gossip and wanted me to stop coming overnight. I can understand them. But my situation was school during the day and job in the evenings and at nights, and the computer labs only open until mid-night as the latest.


    I am not a superwoman; I still need to take a break in between school and job, and between job and homework. The only time I had left was at night after work into the early, early morning. So I ended up sneaking in and out of the house like a thief, peaking through the door to check if anyone's outside in the living room and the kitchen when I needed to use the restroom or to get a cup of water or some food and diminishing my voice volumn so no one can hear a girl's voice coming out from my boyfriend's wooden-walled room. The pressure of fearing being exposed was stressful.


    In the time of stress, especially when time is tight, the phone line always never got through. The feeling of having to control my temper of impatience against the forever-busy phone line was really a conflict for me. I wanted to destroy the stupid computer with a baseball bat, so that I didn't have to deal with its slowness anymore. I was just one of my fantacies. I just wanted to take a break for a moment and be able to feel for a moment of inner peace. Who said that having a modem is worthy? Who said that computer is efficient? Questions like these often wandered in my mind when I can't get through the phone line or when some errors disconnected my phone line in the middle of my work.


    Searching on the net is something, which I found, is a very time-consuming matter. I am the kind of person who doesn't have too much patience. In Chinese there is a saying says, "three minutes degree of heat" to describe people who loses interest very quickly. My mom always used this saying to describe me when I was in high school. I don't think that I am this type of person. I just always have a lot of ideas and wishes in mind that I wouldn't express all at once. I will tell some and save some, so when people sees me doing something else than the things which I have told them, they though that I have changed my mind. It is just never been said to people before, but it has actually been on my mind for some time. Though it is true that I don't like to wait, therefore, it was a pain for me to search. Searching often took a good few days to find something.


  • My Web Page: Spiritual Experiences In Vision Or Aesthetic Perception

  • To Share: A Place to Share Your Personal Experiences



    DEMANDS & CHALLENGES

    Taking this class, working on the net, and posting my works on the net are all new to me. I have never imagined my works to be posted on the net, nor actually seeing my works on net of course. All these came as new challenges to me. In facing all these new challenges, many demands were met as a result. I had to sacrify my sleep. I think it was something which every student in this class sacrified. I demands a lot of sleeping hours normally, but due to this class, I had to overcome this demand of mine and endured my sleepiness. In another way, it was a challenge to me to overcome my physical demand. I also had to eat more to makeup the bad effect of not getting enough sleep or I will get sick.


    As I have mentioned before, I am not a person with a lot of patience. Learning to wait for the response on the net was really something which I worked on. I don't enjoy seeing my getting upset because I am impatient at something. I had never really known that working with the computer is such a patience-taking matter. I had always thought that computer is an advanced technology, therefore, it should be very efficient and user-friendly. I now have learned that not every computer is efficient enough and user-friendly. It took me some temper-controlling to accept this fact.


    Although I have accepted this fact now, but I still have a long way in working on my impatience with waiting. It has become a challenge and a demand for myself. I demanded myself to accept this challenge to be patient and to be nice whenever I am working with the computer or waiting for a response from it. I have seen myself being inconsiderate and rude to the people around me when I got upset and impatient with the computer. I DO NOT want to continue to be like this. A BIG NO NO!! It hurts me later on when I looked back on how I had hurted others. To further practice to be a patient person, I have just applied for a data entry processor. I hope through this, I can learn to be a patient person overall.


  • My topical index: Index of topics
  • Report two: My adapting to Internet


  • WORTH & VALUE


    I think this class is a very valuable class for people who wanted to learn how to set up homepages on the net but are too lazy to take any action. This class will definitely get these people going because of the heavy demands to every beginners. I, myself, am this kind of person. If no one gives me a deadline, I would not have finished anything or have learned anything by now.


    Other than getting myself going, I have learned more than just about computer, the net, commands, and programming. I also have learned about personal issues such as controlling my own temper, looking into myself more and about my attitude toward others. I used to dislike computer, but now, I have learned to like it, especially on searching materials or just to browse through the net to have some fun. I have a great time when I am not doing my homework!


  • Generation One: A list of G1 students in PSY 409

  • Generation Two: A list of G2 students in PSY 409


    MY INVOLVEMENT


    My involvement with the on-line experience has become increasingly more intensive but yet more fun than it has never been before. I am working on-line to do most of the homework for this class now. I like working on-line rather than doing my work on disc. How involved did I become with the on-line? I would rate myself as 7 on a scale of 10. Before taking this class, I send and receive e-mails on-line. This was all of the experience that I have with the on-line experience. As for now, I am not only sending and receiving e-mails, but I am also doing my homework like this on-line, searching information or just browsing for fun on the net, and most exciting of all, creating my own stuff on-line.


    After having more on-line experience, I have been using more of the computer and of the net. I don't feel so inferior of using them anymore. I feel so free to explore, to click on links and to ask questions about it. It is another way to explore myself, to find fun and to be creative.


  • Generation Three: A list of G3 students in PSY 409

  • Back to the top


    MY IMAGE OF INTERNET


    Internet is like a box of umlimited information and materials from all over the world. It is also a wire which connects myself with the world. A world of words where I can express all of my feeling silently and at the same time, the whole world will know all about me with my permission. It gives a peace of silence. It is cold, a piece of technology, but yet it is warm, because it brings news from afar.


    The internet brings the world closer, but also makes the gap between human wider. People can obtain information about other countries from the internet. We can also e-mail our friends, parents, relatives, bosses or to anyone whom we chose to. Internet speeds up the process of communication between people and society, but at the same time, it takes away the touch of closeness from receiving a hand-written letter from a good friend and from treasuring and appreciating the time and effort in writing. The opportunity of feeling someone's thoughts and emotions from handwriting has been lessen tremendously. One of the reasons is that people are becoming lazier, I think. It is sad!


    I think my site could be a helpful site for people who wants to understand the emotional process of someone working on the net and searching process on the net. My site is about working on the net as a beginner and also as a psychologist. It was new to me, and I think it is new to many people. In fact, internet is still new to many. Many are afraid to deal with it. This site would be good for these people because they will realize that they are not the only one. They can learn to explore the internet without fear.


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